I have a couple or three tricks to turn off my monkey brain. One involves releasing endorphins, which does work best if you have a partner to help. And then you can meditate on a solvable problem, which you must be careful NOT to get into a what-comes-first cycle. And then there’s alcohol…
He could also Google “causes of insomnia”. (Cancer, diabetes, asthma, gastroesophageal reflux disease, Parkinson’s disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, epilepsy, fibromyalgia, hear failure, kidney disease, multiple sclerosis, stroke, obstructive sleep apnea, narcolepsy, circadian rytm sleep disorders, angina, concussion, Alzheimer’s disease, and more are all possible causes. So are menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause, which would cause Pig some serious worry.)
Oh thank you so much Pastis for reminding me of a song that messed me up as an impressionable youth: People Who Died by the Jim Carroll Band https://youtu.be/7j2GQqu18J0
If Google is collecting our data the way people say it is, the top of his customized list should be “spam”.
I used to have major episodes of sleep apnea, wake up at 4am gasping for breath and unable to go back to sleep from fear it would happen again. Nothing on TV at that hour but infomercials, but I had a massive collection of DVDs so I looked for something light that wouldn’t matter if I managed to doze off in the middle.
I settled on “Road to Singapore”. Just before dropping off, I discovered that South Sea Islanders apparently sing their fertility rituals in Esperanto.
That’s a terrible way to relax and get to sleep. Even if you manage not to stumble on something disturbing, it will set your mind whirring and before you know it the night’s half gone.
I remember one night I was up till the wee hours just trying to figure out what Graham’s Number is supposed to be. At this I failed; I just got dozens of people trying to impress, usually through breathless hyperbole, that it’s too large a number for our puny brains to visualize.
BE THIS GUY 11 months ago
If that’s what Pig is googling, maybe he should check himself in for couple weeks.
BasilBruce 11 months ago
Pig once tried to sleep by counting, but he was frustrated when he ran out of fingers.
DanielRyanMulligan1 11 months ago
I had my brain “on” all last night, like pig, but didn’t NEED to use google to “start” it up!!!! Dan aka….
B UTTONS 11 months ago
Pig was Googling everything that could happen with a Rat as a roommate.
ronaldspence 11 months ago
Pig needs to get off line and into sleep
Erse IS better 11 months ago
I have a couple or three tricks to turn off my monkey brain. One involves releasing endorphins, which does work best if you have a partner to help. And then you can meditate on a solvable problem, which you must be careful NOT to get into a what-comes-first cycle. And then there’s alcohol…
Sanspareil 11 months ago
Simple Pig, look at all the ways you can die and then choose “other”
minty_Joe 11 months ago
I prefer this one. The song’s so catchy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJNR2EpS0jw
iggyman 11 months ago
Yes he did, Rat!
Purple People Eater 11 months ago
He could also Google “causes of insomnia”. (Cancer, diabetes, asthma, gastroesophageal reflux disease, Parkinson’s disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, epilepsy, fibromyalgia, hear failure, kidney disease, multiple sclerosis, stroke, obstructive sleep apnea, narcolepsy, circadian rytm sleep disorders, angina, concussion, Alzheimer’s disease, and more are all possible causes. So are menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause, which would cause Pig some serious worry.)
Croc Holliday 11 months ago
Bad advice Goat; you really ought to avoid screens when trying to sleep. Read an actual book (not a Kindle) before bedtime.
cornshell 11 months ago
Is “peacefully in your sleep” on the list?
Cornelius Noodleman 11 months ago
Google spelled backwards is Elgoog.
nicholasbonnie3 11 months ago
Goat had good intentions, though with someone like Pig, anything could happen.
TampaFanatic1 11 months ago
If one has trouble sleeping, just try to read something by William Faulkner, that will knock you out in a few pages.
James Wolfenstein 11 months ago
Turn to your wife and ask how was her day. You’re gone in 5 seconds! :D
TechInDallas 11 months ago
That is literally the single worst thing you can do late at night in bed when trying to get a good night’s sleep.
Yakety Sax 11 months ago
Soar
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUlaseGrkLc&pp=ygUXY2dpIGFuaW1hdGVkIHNob3J0IGZpbG0%3D
Tumbleweed Tango
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nw0PkHqx6SM&pp=ygUXY2dpIGFuaW1hdGVkIHNob3J0IGZpbG0%3D
Coin Operated
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5L4DQfVIcdg&pp=ygUXY2dpIGFuaW1hdGVkIHNob3J0IGZpbG0%3D
Quantum Jump
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVNJFBI0b-g&pp=ygUXY2dpIGFuaW1hdGVkIHNob3J0IGZpbG0%3D
Material Girl
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyoaLway15g&pp=ygUXY2dpIGFuaW1hdGVkIHNob3J0IGZpbG0%3D
Goat from PBS 11 months ago
Pig, do you really want to learn the countless ways of death?
zerotvus 11 months ago
And get made into bacon……..
Ellis97 11 months ago
Well for one thing, he could end up in a butcher’s shop and get turned into pork chops.
rshive 11 months ago
In alphabetical order, no less.
Chris 11 months ago
oh pig, now you’re not gonna sleep for weeks now. :L
prrdh 11 months ago
If the blue light weren’t enough to keep him awake…
figuratively speaking 11 months ago
No, Pig!
Zebrastripes 11 months ago
Poor PIG! Always goes to extremes…
Count Olaf Premium Member 11 months ago
Better bet being on his phone googling random stuff is the reason he can’t sleep.
ladykat 11 months ago
Not a good subject when you’re trying to sleep, Pig.
klbdds 11 months ago
Only one way to die. I leave that to God; He knows the when, where, and the details of when I will pass. “No worries mate”
WCraft Premium Member 11 months ago
christelisbetty 11 months ago
Google Mike Pence speeches.
CaveCat87 11 months ago
That’s not what Goat had in mind at all, Pig.
Mel-T-Pass Premium Member 11 months ago
Oh thank you so much Pastis for reminding me of a song that messed me up as an impressionable youth: People Who Died by the Jim Carroll Band https://youtu.be/7j2GQqu18J0
zeexenon 11 months ago
I heard Benadryl works. But I prefer Nyquil. (DISCLAIMER, I have no financial interest in either greedy entity.)
Otis Rufus Driftwood 11 months ago
Next time, tell him to count sheep.
Buckeye67 11 months ago
Pig considering your interest, may I recommend the TV show “Autopsy” for your viewing enjoyment.
dlaemmerhirt999 11 months ago
I KNOW!!! Google, “all the living creatures that can go up your urethra!” Sound sleep is guaranteed!;D
The Brooklyn Accent 11 months ago
But we will all go together when we go.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FektWYJ5sBA
NWdryad 11 months ago
Doom scrolling at its finest
dadoctah 11 months ago
If Google is collecting our data the way people say it is, the top of his customized list should be “spam”.
I used to have major episodes of sleep apnea, wake up at 4am gasping for breath and unable to go back to sleep from fear it would happen again. Nothing on TV at that hour but infomercials, but I had a massive collection of DVDs so I looked for something light that wouldn’t matter if I managed to doze off in the middle.
I settled on “Road to Singapore”. Just before dropping off, I discovered that South Sea Islanders apparently sing their fertility rituals in Esperanto.
zodismoon 11 months ago
You need to watch a boring YouTube video.
TheWildSow 11 months ago
Yeah, we used to watch this sometimes: https://youtu.be/-mB9GWFopQA
Kjvman1 11 months ago
Funny!
Buoy 11 months ago
Pig is not very smart, but he sure tastes good.
cosman 11 months ago
I’ll lay on my right side for 3 to 6 mins., then my left..never did more than three flips before falling.
Sisyphos 11 months ago
Pig has a special knack for picking the wrong Google Search….
youarentjackson 11 months ago
Pig listened to Bobby Lewis and the 5th Dimension.
John Jorgensen 11 months ago
That’s a terrible way to relax and get to sleep. Even if you manage not to stumble on something disturbing, it will set your mind whirring and before you know it the night’s half gone.
I remember one night I was up till the wee hours just trying to figure out what Graham’s Number is supposed to be. At this I failed; I just got dozens of people trying to impress, usually through breathless hyperbole, that it’s too large a number for our puny brains to visualize.
Swirls Before Pine 10 months ago
I put on something long that I really want to watch. I’ll be dead asleep in minutes.