Recent Comments

1. 3 days ago on Luann

   I can’t figure out how they can give a haircut to someone in a mask, when it’s the hair around the ears (where the mask loops go) that most needs cutting. BTW, I tried looking for a Flowbee with an eye towards doing it myself, and the website said they were unavailable.

2. 3 days ago on Pickles

   Violets are purple, which is a shade of blue. (Don’t mess with colorblind people!)

3. 4 days ago on Pickles

   Roses are red.

   Violets are blue.

   I’m schizophrenic,

   And so am I.

4. 4 days ago on Pearls Before Swine

   Consistency is overrated.

5. 4 days ago on Luann

   I see I’m not the only one who hasn’t been able to schedule a haircut in 2020.

6. 5 days ago on Pickles

   You’ve all heard this one, I’m sure….

   She: “If I died, would you remarry?”

   He: “I might. After a suitable period of mourning, I might again feel the need of a companion, someone to look after me in my old age. Just as a way of meeting my social needs, mind you, but I’d never think of her as your ‘replacement’.”

   She: “Okay, I guess that makes sense. But would you sleep with her in our bed?”

   He: “I suppose I might. I mean, even if does have emotional associations, we’d talk it over and come to realize that it’s really just a piece of furniture, and it’d be silly to get rid of a perfectly good bed.”

   She: “I understand. But would you let her use my golf clubs?”

   He: “Never. Not in a million years.”

   She: “Really? But why not?”

   He: “Well, for one thing, she’s left-handed.”

7. 5 days ago on Luann

   Readings from the Kama Klutztra.

8. 5 days ago on FoxTrot

   You’re using unfamiliar terminology. If you want Jason’s help, you need to explain it in terms of “up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, and Start” .

9. 5 days ago on Pickles

   I believe that Barry came out with that (which I mangled the wording of ever so slightly) as part of an effort to get him perceived as a sort of rugged, outdoorsy, camping-going kind of guy.

10. 6 days ago on Pickles

    “If you don’t mind smelling like a peanut for a few days, peanut butter makes a darned fine shaving cream.”— Barry Goldwater