Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for December 05, 2023

Lupin comes pre-printed on the naughty list.

Naughty List:

Lupin.

But I’m loving the idea of Santa the Shapeshifting Elf! And look at the absolute GLEE in Ora Zella’s eyes, not to mention her paws in the air. Dad Cat and Mom Cat are NOT happy though.

Well, I don’t know how reckless this is. I mean, don’t we all believe the same things (maybe with some slight variations, but essentially the same things)?

Come on, Burt! How many household chimneys are there in the world that a full-sized fat man could fit through without some kind of shrinkage going on?

… tiny … tortie … toe beans … sqeeeeeeee!!!! ….

Of course he’s a shape-shifter! Kids have known that for hundreds of years. Long before there was a word for it.

So, Elvis, since you reject that idea, tell us the real scoop.

Maybe he’s like the mailman: You never see him, and some say he doesn’t exist…yet somehow he leaves stuff on the floor to open.

OZ is buying it hook line and sinker!!

Santa passed away in 1876 40 years after being responsible for the death of the legendary Dave Crockett and was a Mexican president and maybe a general and not in any way a shapeshifter.

Uh -oh. I can see both Lupin and OraZ staking out the chimney with a butterfly net, hoping to catch tiny-Santa as he emerges from the fireplace.

Who would’ve thought that Lupin would be a story weaver/teller??

I still think it’s logical. How do we prove it?

I’ve never thought of Father Christmas/Santa Claus as an elf. Elves and gnomes are on his staff, but he is sui generis.

And for those who want to know how the operation is run, I recommend the film “Arthur Christmas”.

Santa has to be an Elf or a shape shifter. It’s just all the stories about him being life sized has been blown out of all proportion! There is no way he is 6’5" with a wide girth. Someone, somewhere along the way made him out to be a giant, when in reality he is an Elf (on the shelf)…..LOL!

And now I have “Father Christmas”, by The Kinks, stuck in my head. I can just see Ora Zella telling Father Christmas to hand it over.

Back in the 1800s (and before), every house had huge chimneys, since they were heated with coal or wood. Think of chimney sweeps, also called climbing boys, who went (or were forced) into such flues. The Water-Babies by Charles Kingsely has a heart-rending depiction of their life. Santa, being, apparently, no bigger than a boy, would fit down such chimneys easily.

oPrometheus, is that you?:

https://people.Com/woman-discovers-possum-hiding-in-christmas-tree-8410211

Lupin dont add too much lore thats matpat’s job!

Eh the only shapeshifter creature me is knows is a cat. There tonnes of evidence, lotsa pictures videos and eyewitnesses to proves it. Hence proven that Santa Claws is a cat. Either a cat or an alien. After all it could be a UFO he is really flies in. And ancient astronut theorists say cats is aliens anyways. Why else they be worship by ancient Egyptians after cats made em builds collosal pyramids to sends ancient signals into outer space. So puts one plus one and it two obvious eh.

OT: Tiny Kittens

You mean Lupin wasn’t already on that list?

I meeeeant to ask this last night, but if Santa’s a shapeshifter, does that mean he’s actually a dog?

You can add my brother’s orange cat, Tiger, to that naughty list! He jumped onto the dinning room table, slid on the table cover and spilled flower vase water, all over himself! My nice laughed, as the startled and soaked bad boy ran away, and said, ‘I bet he learned his lesson!’ I countered, ‘I bet he didn’t!’ And…I was right! Last night, I found the table cover bunched up, the vase tipped over, and a wet trail of paw prints!

I just want to add here that Thing 2 believed in Santa until she was almost 12 and to her credit, Thing 1 didn’t let on and take the magic away. We didn’t either and we think Thing 2 kept her belief to herself because her friends didn’t either know, or were too kind to say anything. So I’m all for the cats believing, regardless of how old they get, that Santa is a shape shifter and can enter any house however he has to because…magic! And Santa is magic :)

Hello everyone, welcome to holiday theory!

Loving this, as usual.

Speaking of naughty lists…Cartoon Lady reminded me I still have a dent in my floor where our heavy, leaded crystal vase met its demise, courtesy of Holmes, last summer. Of all the wedding presents we got 30+ years ago, that one was used quite frequently. I’m not sure the Orange one deserves new crinkle balls or kitty nom-nom treats for Christmas. We’ll have to see.

Lupin never leaves the naughty list, does he?

On Christmas Eve Night

Saint Nicholas: Ready to beam in, Scotty. Energize!

Given the way that cats can slip through impossibly small openings, you’d think they’d completely understand how Santa can do it. Clearly, he’s a cat.

I actually like this. Why can’t you add to Santa’s lore? I’m now tempted to add my own inventions when I have kids and tell them about Santa.

I spent the day yesterday with my 10-year old great-granddaughter. She asked some very pointed questions about Santa, and I told her the tale of Santa’s magic as it was told to me and I told it to her grandmother and father. I also explained why I still believe. She said that if I believed, that was good enough for her.

OT…slightly. Here is what I told my family what I wanted for Christmas. I want them to donate food, blankets, pet beds, and toys to the local no kill shelter. I would consider it a gift to me if they helped them. I challenge others to do the same.

I wonder if Beatrix HAS read lord of the rings…

Well what is wrong with that, a lie, er I mean one lore begats another, and another and another. That’s we’re whoppers come from. Little lies that are built upon with more lies.

Elves make toys with love and care

And a bright red sleigh flies through the air

Peace and goodwill everywhere

Thought Christmas was that way

But now it may not be that fun

Up and down chimneys ain’t for everyone

So many things cannot be done

With a toy sack in the way

I’ve looked at Yule from both sides now

From up and down and still somehow

It’s Yule illusions I recall

I really don’t know Yule at all

Lupin’s tales make Ora squeal

(That’s not how Pucky and Elvis feel)

Shape-shifting Santa’s a big deal

As Lupin tells it that way

But could it be just another show?

Or is loquacious Lupin in the know?

If he’s naughty, don’t let Santa know

Don’t ruin his Christmas day

I’ve looked at Lupin’s both sides now

From naughty or nice and still somehow

It’s his elocution I recall

I really feel much love

When he explains it all

- Joni Mitchell – Both Sides Now

OT: Latest PEW PEW PEW at TinyKittens!

OK Elvis. Let’s see you and/or Puck come up with a better explanation that Ora Zella can accept! Unless and until you can, Lupin’s explanation must stand.

Santa Claus runs a worldwide surveillance program with no accountability or oversight, enforcing an arbitrary system of morality with a spotty-at-best appeals system. Rise up! Reject the “naughty” label! Overthrow the Claus-ocracy!

Well, I dunno, it makes enough sense to me, more so than some other explanations I’ve seen for it.

And if the rest of you really have such a problem with it, then why don’t I hear any of you coming up with alternative explanations, hmm?

This comic strip is pure genius!!! I wish I had this kind of talent and a creative mind!!!

I am so impressed that Ora knows Lord of the Rings.

I have an old fashioned fireplace, and a wood furnace, and a propane furnace. The guy fixing my chimney leak sent me a pic of the thing (I’m too old and acrophobic to go up there myself) and the chimney is not as big as it looks from the outside. It’s only got two 4to6-inch round openings. If Santa is not adjusting his size as needed, he’s never getting down those. Of course I may always be on the naughty list.

That would explain how Santa manages to deliver all the presents in one night.

Santa is a massless plasma, which can generate a temporary, but solid avatar from any available matter. Don’t even get me started on his reign dears… ;-)

OT: Update on Trouble ❤

No lore, just fact.

As a child, one of my favorite things on Christmas Eve was the NORAD intercept of Santa in his sleigh.

Update on orange plush

Puck frowns on your shenanigans, Lupin

Usually I’d side with Puck and Elvis, but this time I think Lupin might be onto something. Come to think of it the famous poem does say he drives a miniature sleigh with tiny reindeer. Santa has magical powers; maybe this is one of them.

It’s Christmas magic. Even Santa himself doesn’t really understand how it works.

This is going to be interesting….

By the way, I wore my Lupin Ghost of Christmas Presents shirt to school today. :) Two of my favourite things, BCN and Dickens

Good zinger, Burt!!

Haha they did bring up lotr elves!

Because of course I missed this when it debuted yesterday …

… since I was scheduled as an elf yesterday morning.

With the chain saw comic I loved Burt. Today not so much. Why snark on the obvious truth about Santa?

Matpat needs to investigate