That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for July 22, 2022

“Mr. Rubens said he wants to sign us to long term contracts for future modeling as long as we don’t diet.”

“Ladies this will stay just with us and that guy who is painting us.”

At the Weight Watchers meeting, Kelly came up with a genius idea to meet her weight target. “Guys, there are no rules about cloths!”

Female Elon Musk impersonators.

♬It’s just a jump to the left♬

♬And then a step to the right♬

♬Put your hands on your hips♬

♬You bring your knees in tight♬

Dude, that’s gross! Why does the one in the middle have toilet paper stuck to her rear?

I always use Aphrodite Wrinkle Cream. It comes in the economical Cornucopia size.

What we have here is a Rubens sandwich.

Movie poster for “Bridesmaids Two; the morning after”

Shemp? No, that one is a member of the Three Gracelesses… nyuk, nyuk!

Another wardrobe malfunction on the set of My Three Daughters

Petticoat Junction, the later years.

That was a good year for women.

Reimagine corpulent copulation.

Mine’s not bad… don’t think much of yours though…

She had said “we should all hang out some time”. And now it does.

Rubens sure had a thing for fat.

One blonde, one brunette one redhead. The rules for girl groups were written longer ago than you think.

“I don’t know what they’re for either—but belly buttons sure are funny!”

The moment Paul Reubens was inspired to make “Pee Wee’s Big Adventure”.

“What do you mean you forgot the sunscreen!”

Playboy models gathering after the pandemic lockdown

Is “Peter” PeeWee’s nom d’art?

I could have been a Rubens model…

The Lumpy Bummies meet!

Medieval version of photochopping young chicks’ heads onto old (but cheap) models’ bodies.

C’mon, children read these things. This is disgusting

walmart customers

Here have we the Graces – there’s three -/

Conferring clandestinely../

Though in charm they are rich/

They don’t own a stitch/

Of apparel: it’s painful to see..///

There’s another Grace. She’s somewhat thinner./

She is has not be invited to dinner./

Her last name is Kelly/

But she lacks the belly/

The belly that makes you a “winner”..///

She eschewed after-dinner mints,/

She never ingested a blintz,/

She was svelte, she was slim,/

She favored the gym/

But it won her the wealth of a Prince..///

Kelly’s triumph, however, was brief/

(As was she – who at last came to grief)/

The obese. Grew inflamed!/

Now “fat-shaming” is shamed/

And we all breathed a sigh of relief !

As a professor once told his art appreciation class, Rubens was “quite the fan of soft, squishy broads.”

“I’ve been working out – feel my muscles!” “Me too! Feel my muscles” “We’re all getting so buff! Feel my muscles too!”

Their initials spell “EAT” or “ATE”

Peter Paul, as you know, was a Fleming/

Aversive to hawing and hemming…

They lacked central heating/

Thus depended on eating/

For warmth- so it’s not fair condemning!

Not Fragonard’s “ girl on the swing”/

Not Botticelli’s slim “Spring “/

They ain’t French, they are Dutch/

And therefore a bit much./

TOO much of a very good thing!

What is this twerking thing?

And now kids, you can see where the term rubenesque originated.

This is what happens when you leave your Graces in the dryer too long after it’s done.

They were painted a long time ago/

By an artist whose name we all know/

One who reveled in “meat”/

But was less skilled at feet/

(But nobody’s eyes go that low)

The first meeting of the Anti-Body Shaming League comes to disorder.

Kardashians?

“Ladies, I do believe we’re a shoo-in for the new woke Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue cover!”

I don’t think “Buns of Steel” apply here.

“See me, feel me, touch me….”

The Three Graces, 40th Reunion Tour. Tickets go on sale tomorrow at 10!

“Shouldn’t we make the Chubby Chasers work harder for it than this, girls?”

Gentlemen, let’s be honest: would you kick any one of them out of Bed?

The Three Graces: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"File:Rubens, Peter Paul - The Three Graces.jpg" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Yahoo, Bing, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and click the first File: found for info and links that point to more info about this roughly lifesize, oil on oak panel painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2964 (July 22, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with the artist info I used to point to here. So far 12 works, by this artist, have been used here (13 originally attributed to him).

Listen up here June Bug, this here is what REAL women look like.

Thalia thinking “I’m the grace of youth & BEAUTY” not “BOOTY.”

I thought the Fourth Grace was Zeppo.

Wait—wrong wrong franchise.

/// “Well, at least they all have pretty faces,”

men said, being dismissive of places

“just too fat.” That’s not cool.

Mother Nature don’t fool,

and remember to never dis Graces.

They used to like ‘em healthy, didn’t they? (cf. Bennie Hill: “Oi loiks ’em ’ealthy, oi duz.”)

Where’s the eye bleach?

I’ve heard nude dancing does wonders for cellulite.

the gals are holding a beautiful body contest, it’s a three-way tie for last place.

I’ve got wood… in my garage.

Zeus has played the three Graces a trick

(at which skill he is known to be slick.)

To get at the Graces’

most intimate places

He disguised himself as Lady Schick.

Have you seen how Venus reduced her cellulite using laser technology?