That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for October 19, 2022

Mme. Mayeur just couldn’t find a painting that would go with her new couch.

/// The rich heiress falls down on her knees;

she is numbed by the beauty she sees.

Focused on art’s perfection,

she won’t feel the injection

from her sister, the would-be marquise.

“Or do you prefer this gentleman? He comes from a well to do family in Spain, and speaks three languages as well as being a champion horse racer”

“I think maybe that tree should be more to the left.”

“I still say you’re holding it upside down.”

these three d photos never work for me!

Madame is not easy to please/

But she’s pleased by the artwork she sees/

the painting is nice/

And it’s brought the old girl to her knees///

She’s glad that she’s brought her young niece./

She will offer is the artist a piece/

As her aunt did with her/

(That old art connoisseur !)/

When the two of them visited Greece. ///

Now the old woman’s beauty is gone/

But the statues that litter her lawn/

Are a tribute to when/

for her favor would grovel and fawn..///

For the male is a simple brute/

Little more than an ape in a suit../

He will readily part/

With a great work of art/

for a man can be played like a flute.

This artist is cockeyed, like this painting! my husband wated more breasts not noses.

Madame: “And what is this odd little creature in the stocking cap and red-striped clothing that hides cunningly amongst the crowd? Is it an elf or a goblin?”

Curator: “Ah, Madame has an enviable discerning eye for detail. That is the pooka that some call “Waldo.” For those sufficiently pixilated, it sometimes appears [clears throat tentatively] as a large nattily-dressed creature, um, of the “Lepus” persuasion, um, so to speak…”

Companion: [sotto voce] “Oh, after half a beaker of elderberry wine, she is liable to see ANYTHING.”

Madam, you can’t keep swiping left. I’m running out of portraits — I mean profiles.

This mirror would be great if it were hung on a wall.

“Madam, it is only a picture of the king, you don’t have to kneel.”

Beatrice completely insulted the artist and his painting style while throwing in a few comments about his mother. Only then did she realize she was looking into a mirror.

She was floored by the image

Lydia’s mother showing her the companion picture for her talk about the birds and the bees.

The first “I Spy” picture.

“Now, we could paint you thinner, and brush-shop those warts away.”

What was so compelling in that painting that she would trade her wheelchair for it and why would the art dealer want her wheelchair?

We’ll never know.

These new paint by the number you’ve finished will absolutely get you into the Art Academy Jean.

“I told my sister that, while she might have a crush on you, I would only come to your miserable little gallery at the point of a dagger. And so here we- ow!”

Why is this woman on her knees? Just the artists way of tricking her into dust mopping his floor? Or getting a down gown/ blouse peep?

“I can also lay it on the floor if you like.”

No, that’s not him. The beard was longer and he had a sharp nose.

Madam’s keeper is using a very short leash.

She: Oh darn, I was hoping for an escape……………

A Visit to the Studio: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"File:Jean Carolus, 1889, A Visit to the Studio, oil on canvas, 78 x 95 cm, private collection.jpeg" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first File: found, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. Other versions has the strip coloration image.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3014 (October 19, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with my comment pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, 5 works by this artist have been used here. The October 14, 2022, strip has the prior.

I have to ask – is the name of the smaller painting near the statues called “Basic Instinct?”

“Oh yes, this nude painting is very accurate, I have to get very close to see my husband’s…”

It is bad when the artist must tell you what he painted.

“No, ma’am, I’m sorry, it is too heavy for me to lift any higher. If you don’t want to see the embracing nudes statue in your peripheral vision, you will have to lean down even farther.”

maybe she’s looking for the animals hidden in the picture?

The Marquise will receive her regards/

(Neither Boucher’s, nor Fragonard’s)/

Not “Man in a helmet”/

Not Elvis on velvet/

But a number of dogs – playing cards !

“No, ma’am, it’s a mirror, not an abstract.”

The early version of Tinder. But instead of swiping left, you throw it in the trash can.

Baroque is passé, as you know/

Today it is all Rococo../

No fantastical flourishes/

It’s simple- butnourishes:/

When they go high, dear, we go low.///

Depicting the life of the peasant/

As though it might somehow be pleasant/

A shepherdess sweet/

(Disregarding the heat)/

For the Marquise, a perfect present..///

One hopes that this elegant gift/

Will give the old biddy a lift/

For when she’s at her best/

She’s a godawful pest/

And we’re trying to mend a rift.

Yes mother, just craw through the painting and you will find the man of your dreams. the I will take your house, car, and bank account, plus your young husband.

now, in this still taken from a surveillance camera, you’ll see that your husband was, in fact, leaving thelma’s apartment at 2 in the morning…

/// Since she got here she isn’t complete.

Head and torso and arms, but no seat.

And now things are much worse

in this weird “Metaverse.”

Zuckerberg gave the other two feet.