Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for April 09, 2021

The annoyed elephants are the worst.

Anyone want to go political on this?

If it’s anything like life, the degree of self-certainty is usually inversely matched by their comprehension of the topic.

for some strange reason Paradise by the Dashboard Light comes to mind with the line “parking by the lake, not another car in sight”

Not only that, you must do them WELL.

I hope he can play “Crocodile Rock”

No! No! Adarsh, that’s not a snake! … it’s a crocodile!

No! No! Akshay … crawl away very, very slowly. That’s not a cobra! … its a black mamba.

Arggg … This is the last time I will take a field trip to Africa!

That looks like an alligator. There are no alligators in India. Is this Florida?

His charming skills were a load of croc.

This is what happens when you have your charm school by a swamp.

As the sly crock waits for an attack…

“Okay, ‘Step 1. Find a snake’. Oh, I found one! See ya!” I said just before I dropped the course.

For the sake of the teacher, I hope the guy who didn’t follow the steps paid his tuition in advance.

And it’’s mating season in the land ‘o gators…

Ivan, the seated Flautist, is about to demonstrate why #2 is so important.

I think the hardest part about charming a snake is learning to play that flute thing.

This reminds me of an episode of M*A*S*H where Hawkeye and BJ have to disarm a bomb by getting instructions over a radio.

“Cut the red wire … but first.”

Sounds like IKEA instructions to me.

That shake charmer is safe. As a vet once told me when taking my dog’s temperature, “I’ve never been bitten by this end”.

Any new experience can leave a lasting memory.

At least the gator is facing the other way.

Crocky seems to object, he says the flute player’s order is just fine by him. (urrp, burp, smack, smack)

Some people have to learn the hard way.

The VCroc is thinking " The heck with the flute, there’s a golfer on the other side"

The crock got tired of waiting for a scene in Pearls Before Swine, and is moonlighting on Non Sequitur.

Somewhere in here is a tail of caution.

That’ll work like a “charm”!!!

Like the great M*A*S*H episode where Hawkeye and McIntyre are defusing a bomb:

Cut the red wire.

But first remove the fuse.

Fatal instruction. Snakes are deaf to high frequencies – alligators are not.

“We’re gonna need a bigger basket.”

I was always told that a snake in the grass was something else…

Am I the only one who read “snake charm school” and thought, Miss Manners teaching snakes proper etiquette?

My niece is an herpetologist, but her master’s thesis was on the life cycles of salamanders living in ponds that dried up in rainless periods (or something to that effect).

You could play that flute all night waiting for that “Log” to coil up and lift up it’s head.

Unless it’s Hungry, that is. Rumor has it that they are Always Hungry.

I’d be more interested in enrolling in Bear Charming School.

The “flute” is for show, the snake has no ears.

Snakes can’t hear a flute. And gators and crocs are not green.