Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for June 10, 2019


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  1. Badass uncle sam
    hawgowar  2 months ago

    Look before you back it in, lady.

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  2. Gerri lutton
    g.lutton  2 months ago

    Just buy a smaller toilet.

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  3. Rick o shay
    wiatr Premium Member 2 months ago

    Big pipes in that plumbing!

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    Z51 Premium Member 2 months ago

    YES! But he forgot to block the sewer grates!

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    Brian G Premium Member 2 months ago

    Why is it that only men are capable of lowering the seat?

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    littlejohn  2 months ago

    The Wiz’s loo must be a sink-hole for this to happen.

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    littlejohn  2 months ago

    Oh well, at least you know that there aren’t any root problems in your sewer lines now.

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    paddy  2 months ago

    Yes, but before that, you left the toilet seat down!

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    Troglodyte  2 months ago

    Poor Wiz – shouldn’t have to put up with THIS crap!

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    Fishenguy  2 months ago

    We have to lower the lid every time because our cats like to jump on it to watch my wife when she’s doing her hair.

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    Little Caesar  2 months ago

    “Just a turd in the sewer of life….”

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    VTX1800F  2 months ago

    they have Really B I G crapper.. besides if She fell in. who flushed the crapper ?

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  13. Millionchimps1
    tripwire45  2 months ago

    It doesn’t work that way.

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  14. Led001d
    Tentoes  2 months ago

    “Women make war over this. Many deaths.”

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    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member 2 months ago

    No, she left the toilet seat up.

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  16. Chanter
    Brian Fink  2 months ago

    I close both the seat and the lid, and I still get yelled at.

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  17. Marvin
    Smokie  2 months ago

    Why does a toilet have a lid if it was not meant to be down? At our house we keep it fair. Everyone has to put the lid down as well. Keeps the toddlers and the pets out.

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    wirepunchr  2 months ago

    Splish splash she was takin’ a bath!

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    James Wolfenstein  2 months ago

    Yeah… right… with that fat ass she can fall inside…

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    Zebrastripes  2 months ago

    Wow! Big toilet for HER to go down….lol

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    flemmingo  2 months ago

    I heard not putting both down causes water spray to not go into the room getting on things like your toothbrush.

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    bobbyferrel  2 months ago

    I have little sympathy for anyone who goes into the bathroom, pulls down their pants and sits down on something they haven’t looked at.

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    Herb L 1954  2 months ago

    Early water slide ;)

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    jasonsnakelover  2 months ago

    Looks like she fell in.

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    guyjen2004  2 months ago

    Those are storm water grates you see along the streets – they’re not connected to the sewage system. Just saying. But it’s still funny :)

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    Al Nala  2 months ago

    Always put the lid down. Keeps the moat monsters from climbing up.

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    micromos  2 months ago

    Toilets don’t come with seats. Seats are an accessory!

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    karlykru Premium Member 2 months ago

    My Dad, a widower, left the seat up … unless I was visiting, then he immediately lowered it – after he discovered I returned it to upright position and actually told me in that firm father’s voice to leave it down because he was quite capable of raising the lid. (He was 90 when this discussion happened.)

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    indysteve9  2 months ago

    How about looking at the seat before you sit down?!

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    sparkle 13 Premium Member 2 months ago

    And SOMEONE is going to DIE!!! lol

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    nufalready  2 months ago

    Oh, if only!

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  32. Booby
    Snolep  2 months ago

    Lowering both the seat and lid, preferably before flushing, is more sanitary and aesthetically pleasing, and keeps stuff from falling in.

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  33. Booby
    Snolep  2 months ago

    The above is true whether you’re male or female, btw.

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    David Huie Green  2 months ago

    “But the important thing is, did you have a nice swim?”

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    hsawlrae  2 months ago

    Ever try being a lady by leaving the seat UP?

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    cubswin2016  2 months ago

    Beg for mercy, Wiz even though you won’t get it.

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    Ebenezer Stooge Premium Member 2 months ago

    Oh, good grief, Blanch! You are such a sewer loser!

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    Josh Lyons Premium Member 2 months ago

    I remember my mom telling my brother when he been in the bathroom too long,“did you fall in?”

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    Bobbo76  2 months ago

    Women leave it down and so men have to raise it. If men are lowering it for women then why shouldn’t women leave it up for men?

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    jrlind55  2 months ago

    I once sat on a toilet when the seat was raised and proceeded to whine about it.

    My mother, who was across the hall doing the ironing, looked up, fixed me with the patient gaze a loving parent has for an idiot offspring and said, “Jeff, you’re 5 years old. You’re old enough to look at a toilet before you sit on it.”

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    parkperson  2 months ago

    At most women….Do you cross the street before looking?

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