Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 23, 2024

When I go for my annual physical, my doctor’s assistant asks me how I feel. I answer: I feel fine until you tell me what wrong with me.

RAT’S LOGIC IS UNASSAILABLE!!!! DAN AKA…PS DOESN’T MEAN HE’S RIGHT, THOUGH…

I feel fine, but there must something wrong with me. I’m going to die sometime this century.

Well, I was just diagnosed with something that’s very aggressive… and small when it was found because I do go see the doc pretty often. My odds are better than they would have been if I’d waited more months.

I find that I never have cavities until I go to the dentist.

Eh better keeps this way Rat. Otherwise if you goes to them they will makes you takes loads of unnecessary tablets and all.

I like Rat’s logic.

He’s alive, isn’t he?

Heh. Wish I could think like this. My stupid brain assumes I have every health issue until told otherwise because of my anxiety.

Lots of older people in Spain refuse to go to the doctor because the doctor might find something wrong with them. In the previous generation (the 80s and early 90s) doctors were still holding back information from older patients, such as a diagnosis of cancer. They might tell the person’s family but not the patient.

Saddest story ever. Poor man wins the lottery. The first thing he does is go to the doctor for a check up because he’d never been able to afford one before. Gets a terminal diagnosis.

>

Rat will live forever.

Their job is to diagnose what is ailing you, in your case, you need more than one doctor. But without going to the doctor, I’d say you are one sick twisted freak.

Rat’s people are a threat to restaurants everywhere and his ancestors carried the plague, so he’s probably not as healthy as he claims.

They’ll find something; they need their kickbacks.

Talk about issues, Rat has a complete set of Readers Digest going back to 1955.

MLK’s son is dead because he did not get his PSA (prostate-specific antigen) levels checked in time. Men, have your GP or your urologist check your PSA at least annually when you turn 50, or before if there’s prostate cancer history in your family. This PSA (public service announcement) brought to you by one who’s been there.

Doctor’s should not have an apostrophe.

“Doctors never give you good news. It’s never like the doctor will come out and go, ‘Good news, the blood test came back: you’re immortal’. They just tell you how you got nothing yet. Keep coming back and I’ll give you this piece of news, it’ll shatter your life.” — Norm MacDonald

For most of my adult life, I managed to avoid doctors – and thankfully, any serious health issues. I’ve always maintained that when doctors say they are practicing medicine, that’s what they’re doing -practicing! And they bury their mistakes!

I’ve jokingly but truthfully remarked that I’ve seen more doctors in the last few years than I did in my entire life.

I guess that I’m like an antique car. I require a little more maintenance to keep me on the road. Fortunately, so far, I haven’t required any major repairs – just a 3 to 6-month checkup to monitor my blood pressure, cholesterol, and prostate. Not bad for an old jalopy who’ll turn 80 this year!

I agree with Rat’s conclusion. I didn’t know I had thyroid issues until I went to a doctor for a check up. It is easier to control my weight now than before.

Well, it makes sense from an illogical point of view.

Sometimes I think Medicare is more about gathering info for govt-funded studies. “On a scale of 0 – 10, how do you feel…?”

Some of us don’t have a choice, Rat – I’m pregnant, and the bloodwork is basically mandatory, because after all, it’s not just my health that’s in question at this point.

WebMD……..oh it’s nothing …..

After I took magnesium citrate for one reason it surprisingly also shrunk this arthritis bump that had emerged on my wrist!

What you don’t know, can’t hurrrrrr ACK! MY HEART! ajagagag’gf’g’,

Ignorance is bliss. What you don’t know can’t hurt you.

Take profit out of health care

When I didn’t have health insurance I’d avoid getting things like Fred mammograms and other free diagnostics. I worried that if something were found I wouldn’t have the resources to get treatment. Life in these United States.

I’m sorry to be a kiljoy but I wish my brother had seen a doctor annually. He might still be alive if he had.

If you don’t see a doctor, how do you know you are in good health?

no news is good news. ;)

Rat, you’re only fooling yourself. There’s a good chance that you might have health problems that you don’t even know about, unless you happen to come upon a doctor who might just deduce that you’ve got lots of health problems while you’re out in public.

I had a boss who had that attitude. He died at 57.

A lot of men are like this. Just ask a doctor.

Anecdotes are just that, not statistical data.In general it is better to get treatment from something before it becomes a big problem, even if it means having to take pills regularly. There may be no pills that fix a big problem.

I go to the doc when I need an RX filled. That’s it!

He told me the ins cos want us to go every 3-6 months and I said not going to happen! What a bunch of bullcrap!

It’s ok he eats an apple everyday.

First, let me state that I do not hold with Rat’s beliefs on the matter.

That said, my MIL (who, ironically, worked for a cardiologist her entire working life) refuses to see a doctor because she reasons that they will just find something wrong, and she doesn’t want to know.

Except for fiber myalgia and close to total vision loss, she’s doing fine at 91. Lives alone and manages fine.

I know it’s illogical but still, I can relate. Ignorance really is bliss a lot of the time.

This comic is not about doctors; it is about elections. In particular, the 2020 and upcoming 2024 elections.

My late wife had that same attitude. Lied (hid) symptoms for several years and one night had a massive heart attack and died. Don’t mess around with your health!

When I got Covid, I went to a horse vet. He gave me some medicine, I’ve never felt better. And he’s cheaper. (Didn’t care much for his hospital, though.)

Same logic as my sister-in-law, but I’m working on it.

Rat’s right… with health care having become a profit-driven industry, they have to find something wrong with you

Amusing fact, I was reading all this, but was interrupted by a “Phone Visit”with my Doctor, in order to get some prescriptions refilled.

I like to say: A donut a day keeps the doctor away. (They told me to change my diet or not come back…)

Logic can prove that logic can’t prove anything.