Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for March 02, 2019

It just seems longer.

You should have some prunes just like wifeys face.

I know how you feel, Buddy.

It’s all about what is added to a salad or a potato. There is nothing wrong with a baked potato with the skin and some low fat sour cream and chives.

They live longer because if their don’t listen and stay healthy, then their wives will kill them anyway.

Technically, you could have the potato and then find a new wife if that was a prerequisite to living longer. Win win.

Well, I suppose she has you best interest at heart. I mean really, without some over site or rules the rich would be living in Yellowstone park and bathing in the natural springs.

They live longer JUST so they can dance on her grave…

I’m sensing some misogyny in this thread.

Some facts here that might change this.

Married men live longer lives than single men, apparently having someone who cares about them keeps them from getting depressed leading to better life choices.

Married women live shorter lives than single women, apparently because the additional stress of married life takes its toll.

We men really have no cause to complain as we’re getting the better end of the bargain.

It just seems longer… (“now I’m praying for the end of time”)

Oh! And as to salads. Salad dressings are an abomination and should never be allowed to smother what should be a tasty dish.

Married men don’t live longer – it just seems that way. (Just kidding dear.)

Butter AND sour cream?

You live longer, but you don’t enjoy it, what’s the point?

Yes, and we should be thanked more often…put the dressing on the side and forget about it.

Just add the chives to the potato and there you have it – salad.

females don’t have the corner on the market on healthy meal choices

Three pieces of lettuce with a bucket of dressing.

Married men DO live longer, and I think it actually is because their wives make them go to a doctor when they need to.

That’s perhaps based on wife’s jealousy of his free-range diet, given that he just wants to eat tasty stuff; she may actually covet a cheeseburger & fries. In all fairness, it took a good woman to introduce me to good salads, quite apart from the iceberg & thousand island in my parents home. My first hot fresh spinach salad with bacon, garlic, oil & vinegar changed my world. Nowadays, I follow Lydia’s kitchen on PBS.

Take the real bacon I was going to add to the potato and put it on the salad.

In defense of all wives everywhere I am tired of being blamed for our husbands’ health problems. ‘Why didn’t you feed him better?’ ‘Why didn’t you make him take his medicine?’ ‘You really should get him to exercise more.’ It’s as if all husbands are 5 year olds who can drive! If a husband has medicines he is supposed to take each day, why should the wife have to remind him to do so? (Note: Doctors recommend that you don’t remind him because that keeps him from remembering on his own). If a husband choses to stop at a fast food place on the way home or to buy a bag of candy to eat in the car, why is that the wife’s fault? We can buy healthy foods and fix healthy meals but there is absolutely nothing to stop a man from shopping on his own and getting whatever junk food he wants. Of course, when the wife is obese, it’s not the husband’s fault — ‘Boy, she really let herself go!’

I have the greatest incentive to live longer. I’m married to the most wonderful woman in the universe and I want to spend as many years as I can with her.

What I usually do is order a bun-less bacon cheeseburger (keeping the veggie toppings) and instead of fries, I order a side garden salad (with NO dressing and NO croutons). I then cut up the burger, add it to the salad, bring my own olive oil and use that as dressing, along with salt and pepper. I really love THAT salad. :o)

That was my mother-in-law. My father-in-law was a diabetic with a heart condition and for a while had an ulcer. He said that he would die from malnutrition since virtually every food known to man was excluded from his diet.

My MIL did a good job cooking healthy for him. When they went out, people asked how he knew what to eat.. He says, “If I order the wrong thing, I get ‘the look.’”

Have both – you only live once ;o)

But how much FUN do they have?

I used to get salads in restaurants drowned in bleu cheese dressing, which I love. I finally got smart and get the dressing on the side and put just a teaspoonful on the salad and spend a couple of minutes thoroughly mixing the salad so every bite has a thin coating of the dressing. I am convinced that I take in a lot less calories that way.

And bring some ranch on the side… never mind; just leave the bottle. And don’t forget the cheese and bacon crumbles.

WOW, bet you have a lot of excitement in your life. Even old fools like you should have a little bit of excitement in their life. Maybe you ought to try the 1/3 pound steak.

Taking a brand new tract — is that guy at the counter wearing a MAGA hat?

My father wants me to eat healthy so when i take him grocery shopping he’s always buying for me “low fat” foods. He bought some “low fat” cheese 6 years ago. It still hasn’t gone mouldy. I figure people who eat low fat died a long time ago, they’re just preserved

I was surprised and pleased that almost all of today’s comments were about food rather than the politically charged phrase “oversight committee”.

So true. So very true. And my husband agrees.

Not the salad, the dressing…

Longer, perhaps. Happier?

A funny cartoonist when he keeps his politics to himself

When I was in college, I used to go to McGuire’s Irish Pub.

They served a Chef’s Salad that began with an entire head of lettuce, piled on the Ham & Cheese until it was embarrassing and was served with a Quart jar of salad dressing and a Ladle.

The only place I’ve ever seen where you Needed a doggie bag for your Salad.

My daughter in law’s dad was a doctor, so she never had to GO to the doctor, she was treated at home. She still requires a tow truck to get her to one, even when she has pneumonia. To make matters worse, she is 15 years older than he is, and if married men live longer than married women, chances are he will outlive her. Sigh.

Well, yes, salad. There’s also the extra exercise gained by well behaved husbands.

A self portrait of Wiley and the Missus ?

And then the replies began.

Married men don’t live any longer….it just SEEMS that way!

Which is a conundrum, because most married men are so much more willing to die . . .