Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for December 12, 2022

No disbelief on the part about BUTTS!

Our big glutes makes us one of the best animals in the planet’s history at walking on two legs for long periods of time.

Kangaroos are technically even better, but their whole strategy is a lot different than ours.

I wonder if McD’s decided to avoid the classic “aristocrats” joke. If you’re not familiar with that one, be careful when looking it up.

It was a then-21-year-old secretary for McDonald’s advertising department, Esther Glickstein, who gave it the name Big Mac.

Looks like that kid’s taking a leak into the wind under that tree. “Gone with the Wind”

Calling the Big Mac “The Aristocrat” would akin to putting lipstick on a pig….

Imagine what these animals would be doing while staring at Kim you-know-whose butt!

I believe Ketchup does, trying to get rid of the watery 1st squirt might cause the whole bottle to be a little thinner

Don’t we also have the largest brains in proportion to body size?

Where’s the special Mac sauce?

A lot of things become thinner when you shake them. Including me.

And my ex’s butt accounted for most of that disparity.

Take care, may proud derriere cataloger Randal “We Must Contemplate The Hidden Functionalities” Keisterord be with you, and gesundheit.

Of course it becomes thinner, the water separates out to the top.

The Aristocrat would have been the perfect companion to the Royale with Cheese.

Well, if they are using Americans for that first factoid, then I guess it is accurate.

The two founders of the McDonald’s restaurant were Mac and Dick McDonald. Their most famous burger is named after one of them.

I’m really glad they went with Big Mac.

Another burger? Sure.

Russian POW calls home: ‘Mum, I’ve been captured’.

Mum: ‘Where are you?’

POW: ‘Ukraine.’

Mum: ‘Can you get us a Big Mac?’

Moving on to “butts”

What’s the difference between a butt kisser and a brown-nose?

Depth perception.

How many researchers DID it take to measure the butts of lions, tigers, and bears, oh my?

Then of course, how and where do you find an octopus’s butt?

Plenty of sugar-laden tomato-saucin’ condiment

on your frequent, size-of-a-continent,

hot-off-the-grill-o

Aristocrats

- drats! -

will leave you totin’ your own sofa pillow.

Sometimes when I’m shopping, I’ve almost said out loud, “Look at that big butt!!!”…

Oh come now. The butt of an elephant is more than what I weigh altogether.

May the Lord be with you as He is with me.

Elephant butts are bigger,except for more than half of the mother-in-laws

Would we still have the biggest butts if we were bent over at 90 degrees like the animals?

Or am I horses-patoot for even asking?

I thought that’s why we shook the ketchup bottle!

Another Kardashians story?

Yeah, someone in the tasting group probably referred to it as “Afistocrap”.

Human women also have the biggest boobs in the animal kingdom. On average.

Larger containers are preferable so the ketchup can be spooned the same as mayonnaise.

Why did Steve’s admittedly unpalatable joke wind up at the BOTTOM here? Did Tuco do this? After all, RBION did start the whole big butts topic today—an obvious temptation. And my previous comment on his joke disappeared too. Plus, I have not seen Mr. Shrilly here in quite a while. Somebody kicked somebody’s b*tt down the ladder here!

This would’ve been less creepy if it featured an adult instead of a kid.

“And what do you call these burgers?”“The ARISTOCRATS!!”Anyone who knows that joke sure ain’t eating one.

Thinner, but it also prevents all of the separated water/vinegar/runny liquid from going all over whatever you are applying it to!

It’s interesting that someone with the last name beginning with a “K,” first came to mind, with the “big butt” part.

Technically, Ketchup sets itself up as a semi-crystalline solid and shaking will break that bond thus allowing it to flow more freely . . . similar to quick mud in an earthquake such as Port Royal’s or the dry lake bed upon which some major cities are built!

Or in the universe if you’re a kardashian or some other big bummed, botox injecting, empty brain idiot

I don’t know; I’ve seen horses’ a- uh, butts, and they looked pretty big.