Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 27, 2016

I would stay 6 feet away from you if I didn’t have such a strong desire to punch you in the nose.

Actually, that space barrier is to avoid getting bicycle riders’ doucheness on the rest of us.:If that’s not a word, it should be.

Go to the countryside where there is less people.

Around here that would preclude ever going to a coffee shop on a weekend morning.

Sounds like most idiot cyclists. I’m waiting for open season on them.

Hmmm.. I see the Trump supporters are on GoComics tonight.

Jef’s a poseur. He’s acknowledging that someone other than himself (Pig) exists, and is actually having an interaction with him! That proves he’s not a real cyclist.

I bike on a local path thru the woods which is for walking and biking. When coming up from behind, I ring my bell to warn people, many bikers don’t bother. They lack comprehension that hitting someone can also injure them. Basically Jeffs!

And to wonder why there are so many white bicycles in my city,

If bicycle people want to ride on streets with other vehicles then they should: have insurance, pay registration, get bike inspected and pass a driving test. If you want to run with the big dogs you must act like a big dog :-}

So there is a chink in Jef the Cyclist’s armor. He does not know how to spell “ORDINAIRINESS”. I knew that there was something fishy about him, ……. other than his being a cyclist.

I think that the other 90% of bicyclists (and while we’re at it vegans) are getting a bad name lately. Yes there are plenty of both that are pretentious jerks, but we characterize the group by a few bad apples.

Jef’s case of “I”-strain is getting as bad as Rat’s!

We have a bunch of pedalists that ride by in front of our property. If I happen to be out front when they pedal by I will give an acknowledgement ( a slight wave or a head nod or even sometimes a spoken hello) I have not had a single one responds back, even if they are riding in pairs or alone. It isn’t that they haven’t seen me before or are speed riding.However, that said, it pizzes me off to no end the buttholes that won’t move over if the left hand lane is open. Those DA’s won’t move over to give room. They do the same to pedestrians, or people working along the road. It must be too much effort to do so.

Jef would take great offense to those of you who spelled his name with two Fs.

The guy sounds exactly like today’s liberals.

And to think that when I was a young man I’d ride my bike everywhere and regarded it as a useful form of transport – I completely overlooked the fact that I was saving the planet and displaying my superiority to mere mortals…

They should register and pay a fee—have license tags so others can report their reckless driving.

Wow….didn’t take long for some idiots to drag politics into a non-political comic strip.

I live in a major US city and no single subject engenders more angry letters to the editor than the conflict between drivers, bikes, and pedestrians.

We could slash the number of traffic accidents down to nearly zero if we banned all cars inside towns and cities.

Should be: “any of us cyclists that ARE walking around”. On the other hand, I can’t draw very well at all.

Hmmm… is Pastis hitting us with a Mallett here?

“…us cyclists is walking…” It should be ’…we cyclists ARE walking…" Pastis, you know how to construct a sentence. What happened?

“Go to the countryside where there is less people.” Does the poster mean headless, armless or legless people? Probably not. The poster probably means “fewer” people.

As we drive next to the cyclists that ride side by side instead of in a line, I want to stick out my arm and knock them off of their bikes.

Jef should move to Seattle. His dream is becoming a reality in a city with seven hills and a deserved reputation for rain. Smart.

Jeff doesn’t want to get any ordinariness on him, and we don’t want to get any of his odor-ness on us.

I like cyclists. They make cute squeaking noises when they fall down. (Not that I have any idea why they fall down.)

The thing I hate most about bicyclists is picking the bits of hair and flesh out of my grill.

It’s very simple. Automobiles have the right of way. Period.

what a dweeb

I knew it! Jef’s from Portland!!

Have we ever seen Jeff the Cyclist actually cycle?

Shots fired at “Frazz”. Again.

Cyclists seem to have a reputation for being arrogant.

Oops, Maybe I should add “Some” cyclists do.

Just to be safe.

xxx

You should live here in Eugene, Or. Nine out of ten bicyclists don’t have lights or reflectors on their bikes. At night it’s hard to see them and if you hit one, of course it’s your fault. They demanded bike lanes, and got them but, ride anywhere they want too. They buy a $500 bike but, are to cheap or “cocky” to buy a $10 light.

I always thought that lane was for bonus points and 2x points for hitting people on bicycles.

This strip proves that Jef the Cyclist knows less than nothing about cycling. “Bike lanes” are extremely hazardous, and real cyclists avoid them as much as possible.

I did ride on Western Avenue after it was bike laned, and got my knuckles rapped. Thereafter, if I couldn’t get to a destination without using Western, I struck it off my itinerary.

Jef the Cyclist, you are not Captain Marvel, so stop behaving like such an Entitlement Boor before someone decides to flatten you on the pavement and add a notch to his vehicle’s score!

Cyclists have equal rights on the road,but too many of them don’t practice safe cycling,or obey the road laws.I like to cycle recreationally,but I stay off major roads especially truck routes.Too scary for me.In many European cities cycling rules the day,and that attitude will pervade North America eventually.Might as well get used to it!

Screw ‘em all until they start riding one by one, not 6 across on a two-lane public highway. Cycling ruling the road in the U.S.? Ain’t NEVER gonna happen with the distances and living situation (far away from work) so entrenched here.

Modest, ain’t he?

Yeah. I’ll try REAL HARD not to run your arrogant ##!%%& down when you drift into my lane.

He was ahead of his time

He got his wish.

This is so true where I live.

The origins of social distancing

Well, Jef, I don’t to get your arrogance on me, so it’s a deal!