That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for December 08, 2023

/// In the Studio young Hertha froze,

having taken off all of her clothes,

while the painter, (old goat),

wears a long heavy coat

and he’s bundled up head to his toes.

/// Hertha knew that the job required stripping,

but she trembles, her nose red and dripping.

The stove gives off no heat,

so she clenches her seat,

and requests the flask from which he’s sipping.

“Sir, your model is just outside.”

Despite the lack of heat, as long as the old man kept his clothes on, Helga didn’t mind stripping hers off.

It certainly paid better than honest work.

oh…I thought you said embarrassed. not Im bare a$$ed…

I think you are embellishing my lumps.

Where’s the bathroom?

Yes, the cold does make them stand up

“That looks nothing like me. In fact they don’t look like my breasts at all.”

When he revealed that he was the janitor, Margie quickly covered herself. When she saw how good he was, she decided against kicking him in the groin.

“Have you never seen a naked woman before?”

I’m no legal expert, but I don’t think he’ll get away with painting a nude underage girl by claiming she’s a nymph.

Old artist Paul had about seen them all,

Fat women, skinny, short, and tall.

Although his paintings still sold well,

He no longer cared, “What the h3ll,

For me, mere nude women no longer enthrall.”

.

Mimi was a free spirit, not of the sort

To be so shy as to refuse to cavort

Sans clothes before artists admiring her a$$

And transferring sublimed lust to their canvas.

A shame that most men considered her sport.

.

A shame that Paul and she were ages apart

He looked past her body and into her heart;

She looked past his body and into his, too.

Oh, Time, you cruel thief, why are you

Not synched with Eros — your arrow, his dart?

I’m over here, you’re looking at the stove!

You should have used the buttery while on my butt.

“That’s her! That looks EXACTLY like the woman who stole my clothes! But can you at least bring me a blanket? It’s been three days…”

“This is going to be Dagwood’s best Christmas present ever!”

“My butt’s not that fat!”

“I like big butts, and I cannot lie…”

Not being the brightest girl, Nicki finally decided to question Gustav’s motives, when he offered to show her how he held his painting pallet, without using his hands.

Diane: “When Sam sees this, he’ll love it. He’ll forgive me,”

Semenko: “He’ll hate it, and he’ll hate you for doing it.”

“Can you blur out my face? I don’t want China Joe’s corrupt DoJ targeting me.”

That’s a beautiful wardrobe, seriously. And she’s not bad either.

You know Godiva, the lady who chose / To wear her tresses instead of her clothes / I’ve a mind to paint her / Hope it’s not a bother / Undo your hair and strike a new pose!

Could you fill out the cheeks a bit? I’d like people to think I have a Kartrashian butt.

The likeness quite suited Annie/

TThe old artist, whose skill was uncanny/

Was able to render/

The spectacular splendor/

Of the goose pimples on her fanny.

Do you think you can airbrush out that mole?

Artemis, throw some more coal in the stove or I am out here…….

It looks to me as though the woman in the painting has rather more flesh on her bones.

There was a good reason that old Heinrich liked to keep himself warm, his studio cold, and his models nude.

Heinrich loved sharing pictures of his grandchildren, but it just made everyone else at the senior center uncomfortable.

“Now give this to the agent at Window J, and your driver’s license should arrive in the mail in a week to ten days.”

Ebenezer Scrooge and the Ghost of Christmas Whoopie

“Step a little closer, Dear, I’m trying to get a good down-blouse look …”

“Could you make them bigger? I really want to wow ’em on Tinder.”

“My eyesight and memory aren’t what they used to be, my dear. Did I get everything in the right place?”

Before he can paint, he must swaddle/

Himself- and nearby place a bottle/

But he won’t pay for fuel/

He’s both cheap and he’s cruel:/

He’s not one to coddle the model.

The pile of clothes to the left shows that the model kept forgetting to get dressed after every session.

“Silly blind fool! You’re painting my hat and dress on the door hook! I’ve been behind you trying to find something that fits me in that pile of clothes you left me.”

In the studio or Studio scene: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Paintings of female models in the artist’s studio" Wikimedia 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, Ecosia and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found and once there find the text string Rettig, and click its link for info and links that point to more info (perhaps best viewed using the Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox browsers, which can automatically translate most webpages if necessary) about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting, including a Description (albeit in German). 

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3233 (December 8, 2023) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. Only work by him used here so far.

“Um. I hate to ask, but can you paint me as a natural blonde?”

“So this is what I’ll look like after treatment? I’ve heard all you chiropractors are quacks.”

artist mac Donal found that painting cloths was much cheaper than buying them.

The model, who works in the raw/

Is probably breaking the law-

She is only sixteen/

and the pose is obscene/

And he is her own grandpaw../

“No matter how wicked and immoral her life became, she remained young and beautiful while her portraitist got older and uglier.” — The Picture of Daria Gray

“That’s what I love about painting high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age. Alright, alright, alright.”

Gotta keep your upper parts perky, since your bottom parts are sub-par.

You want somethin’ in the mornin’? Oh hell no. Ain’t gonna be nothin’ in the mornin’ with me!

Paint one, get the next one for free? Oh hell no. You better turn up the heat before I say ok to that!

Herr Rettig? It’s my sister that has the birthmark….

Clever.

Great you gave me bigger boobs…………

The pressure had grown too intense/

And he never quite knew from whence/

His courage returned/

And the worm at last turned/

And the name of the worm was Mike Pence.

Yes, from this view, I do need to see a ‘gardener.’