Brutus is an idiot, but so are many, many people. I read that A&W tried to promote 1/3 lb burgers, but it was a failure because the idiotic public thought 1/4 lb burgers were bigger.
A guy goes into his proctologist’s office for his first exam. The doctor’s new nurse took him to an examining room and told him to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see him. She said that he would only be a few minutes.
After putting on the gown that she gave him he sat down. While waiting he observed that there were three items on the stand next to him. A Tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove and a beer .
When the doctor finally came in he said “Look Doc, I’m a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for and I know what the glove is for but can you tell me what the BEER is for?"
The Doctor became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung it open and yelled to his nurse .. . . . . .
I would just walk away from her. I couldn’t tolerate that abuse and would not want to get in an argument with her. I am surprised he doesn’t say, “Gladys, come get your mother.” I had a disagreeable MIL and I found infinite reasons to leave the house when she would show up unannounced.
I guess thinking Lite refers to its mass rather than its caloric content is a reasonable assumption. But, what’s really stupid is Mother Gargoyle’s put downs of Brutus. The man loves her daughter, Gladys, he provided her with a grandson, he works to provide for his family, has a regular job with some security, is a good father to his son, and is kind. Those are rare enough plusses for any man. What’s really stupid is mother’s continued attempts to run Brutus off. That’s grade A stupid.
True fact. I used to work for Coca Cola. They had 5 gallon “Boxes” of syrup that we would deliver to restaurants/bars and what not for fountain drinks. Without a doubt, the regular Coke boxes weighed WAY more than the Diet Coke boxes. Obviously because of the sugar, but it was weird picking up the exact same size box and have it be sooo much lighter!
Ah the loving battle-axe strikes again. I’d be interested to know what came before her little jab. Was it provoked or just the first thing to pop out of her alleged mind? My guess is she just felt she hadn’t insulted Brutus sufficiently today so she pitched that lame tidbit. Good on our hero for not responding.
Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member about 1 year ago
Also spracht the Acid Queen.
Robert4170 about 1 year ago
Brutus is an idiot, but so are many, many people. I read that A&W tried to promote 1/3 lb burgers, but it was a failure because the idiotic public thought 1/4 lb burgers were bigger.
angelolady Premium Member about 1 year ago
Shhh, Brutus!!
Ahuehuete about 1 year ago
Only if it’s Bud Light!
Baarorso about 1 year ago
Brutus; “You’re no Mensa candidate yourself, Ma GARGOYLE!”
Jeff0811 about 1 year ago
Light beer has kind of an amber color, dark beers are, well, dark in color.
dcdete. about 1 year ago
This reminds me of a children’s puzzle. “Which weighs more? A pound of butter flies, or a pound of dragon flies?”
GROG Premium Member about 1 year ago
So much for the tastes great/less filling debate.
Richard Howland-Bolton Premium Member about 1 year ago
Actually it is, since the ethanol molecule is heavier than water and light beer contains less of it. So there!
Meg: All Seriousness Aside about 1 year ago
Oh, come on. Everyone knows lite beer has more lumens.
Doug Taylor Premium Member about 1 year ago
A guy goes into his proctologist’s office for his first exam. The doctor’s new nurse took him to an examining room and told him to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see him. She said that he would only be a few minutes.
After putting on the gown that she gave him he sat down. While waiting he observed that there were three items on the stand next to him. A Tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove and a beer .
When the doctor finally came in he said “Look Doc, I’m a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for and I know what the glove is for but can you tell me what the BEER is for?"
The Doctor became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung it open and yelled to his nurse .. . . . . .
Darn it!!! I said a BUTT LIGHT “
Just-me about 1 year ago
Depends on the scale you’re using Brutus. Weight by volume is the same, however the “light” beer weighs a little less on the caloric intake scale.
tcummings1952 about 1 year ago
They just “lite” up the fridge after dark
flemmingo about 1 year ago
Well, well the old battle axe comes in to spread her love!
rhpii about 1 year ago
And his laptop is a lot lighter after he deleted all those files.
Chris about 1 year ago
maybe it says lite cause it’s brighter then most other beers. :D
Moonkey Premium Member about 1 year ago
I would just walk away from her. I couldn’t tolerate that abuse and would not want to get in an argument with her. I am surprised he doesn’t say, “Gladys, come get your mother.” I had a disagreeable MIL and I found infinite reasons to leave the house when she would show up unannounced.
MRC112 about 1 year ago
All down to the specific gravity of the beer
assrdood about 1 year ago
Lite beer is like decaffeinated coffee. Why bother?
ladykat about 1 year ago
Weight is the same, alcohol content is different, Brutus.
preacherman Premium Member about 1 year ago
I guess thinking Lite refers to its mass rather than its caloric content is a reasonable assumption. But, what’s really stupid is Mother Gargoyle’s put downs of Brutus. The man loves her daughter, Gladys, he provided her with a grandson, he works to provide for his family, has a regular job with some security, is a good father to his son, and is kind. Those are rare enough plusses for any man. What’s really stupid is mother’s continued attempts to run Brutus off. That’s grade A stupid.
Alberta Oil Premium Member about 1 year ago
Speaking of weights… what does electricity weigh? Does a fully charged EV weigh more than one that has a flat battery?
ChessPirate about 1 year ago
“Aw, go haunt a Cathedral!”
ᔑ(•ʊ̯•)ᔐ
raybarb44 about 1 year ago
Sorry Big Guy. 12 ounces is still ounces. Though it is lighter in calories. So by that measure, you are not wrong in your perception…..
andersjg Premium Member about 1 year ago
Brutus just wants her to light out on her broom.
bigplayray about 1 year ago
True fact. I used to work for Coca Cola. They had 5 gallon “Boxes” of syrup that we would deliver to restaurants/bars and what not for fountain drinks. Without a doubt, the regular Coke boxes weighed WAY more than the Diet Coke boxes. Obviously because of the sugar, but it was weird picking up the exact same size box and have it be sooo much lighter!
mistercatworks about 1 year ago
No, but a “Lite” beer is one letter lighter than a “Light” beer.
Brent Rosenthal Premium Member about 1 year ago
Ah the loving battle-axe strikes again. I’d be interested to know what came before her little jab. Was it provoked or just the first thing to pop out of her alleged mind? My guess is she just felt she hadn’t insulted Brutus sufficiently today so she pitched that lame tidbit. Good on our hero for not responding.
Dapperdan61 Premium Member about 1 year ago
Light Beer is for lightweights
Sir Davecelot about 1 year ago
I thought so too…
beharford about 1 year ago
Old, tired response: “Yes, Mother Gargle, I AM indeed stupid…remember, my first stupid act was marrying your daughter”
Not the way he really feels, I am sure, but it may slow down her attacks for a wee…
kathleenhicks62 about 1 year ago
Poor fellow sarcasm at work and to only get petty sarcasm at home.
cuzinron47 about 1 year ago
It’s hard to insult a simple man.
Lola85 Premium Member about 1 year ago
That’s OK, Brutus. In this case, a snippy comeback wouldn’t have worked.
Gina Carson about 1 year ago
If it has fewer calories it should weigh less, right?
T... about 1 year ago
Brutus thinks, “No wonder Romona is so nasty she’s in AA”…
T... about 1 year ago
Well Ramona is right about something, Brutus is really a prize, one that Gladys won…
heathcliff2 about 1 year ago
No need. Two words were enough to send her on her way.
christelisbetty about 1 year ago
Since she said “Lite beer”, It would be Miller, if it was liter it would be a measure of volume.
kjnrun about 1 year ago
Any light beer is like drinking water. <<<<<<beer snob
Chris Sherlock about 1 year ago
Mother G takes the prize for being annoying. No one else comes anywhere close.