Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 01, 2012
Transcript:
"Elly Elephant was sick of Henry Hippo. So she sat in her kitchen and tried to envision her dream man. 'I will take this empty basket and put in one avocado for each trait I want in a man.' So she put in one avocado for sensitivity, and one for handsome, and one for adventurous. 'And I want him to be dependable,' she said, putting in another avocado. But when she did, out fell adventurous. 'Well, he at least needs to be non-superficial,' she said, adding another avocado. But out dropped handsome. 'Okay, he can't be needy,' she said, squeezing in another. But out fell sensitive. 'The basket can't hold all the avocados,' Elly cried in despair. 'I'll simply have to learn to be happy with the few avocados I have.' Which was none because Henry Hippo turned them into guacamole." Goat: Oh, this is an uplifting tale. Rat: "So remember, people. Be happy with the crappy partner you have." Pig: I will strive to be alone forever!
arson549 over 12 years ago
Happy New Year everyone!
doc white over 12 years ago
crap as avocado? Green crap.
chireef over 12 years ago
eventually all avocados turn into crap
Harryfan over 12 years ago
If you can’t be with the one you, love the one you’re with.
comicsgeniusguy over 12 years ago
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Sisyphos over 12 years ago
Great! Pig is the most practical. Goat remains the idealist. Rat is the philosopher for neo-nihilists.
SusanSunshine Premium Member over 12 years ago
Elly, Elly…. don’t put all your avocados in one basket.
finale over 12 years ago
When life gives you advocados; make lemonade!.(Guess I shouldn’t have had those last 4 pints of Guiness last year).
SusanSunshine Premium Member over 12 years ago
Finale — maybe it’s “When life gives you lemons, get some avocados and make guacamole.”
farwingedselene over 12 years ago
‘Avocado’ comes from the Nahuatl word ‘ahuakatl’, which means ‘testicle’. ahem
Hugh B. Hayve over 12 years ago
Is a hippopotamus just a real cool opotamus?
zero over 12 years ago
Wait ’til next year!
mabrndt Premium Member over 12 years ago
HAPPY 2012!
poppy48 over 12 years ago
go to work
Michelle Morris over 12 years ago
She’s gonna need a bigger basket!
chris_weaver over 12 years ago
Just like Henry Hippo to ruin a perfectly good metaphor.
rshive over 12 years ago
Rat, though as usual he overstates the case, has a point. All of us are human (more or less) and have faults. Expecting perfection is a sure way to neither get nor hold happiness.
Happy, happy, happy!!! Premium Member over 12 years ago
no pig. “alone” sucks.happy, happy, happy new year everyone.
Lowtech over 12 years ago
wait…today’s sunday?
Kaputnik over 12 years ago
Durn, thought for sure this was going to be a setup for one of Stephan’s puns.
Happy New Year comics fans!
T. Shepherd creator over 12 years ago
Henry Hippo: Mr. Good Enough.
LongLiveCartooning over 12 years ago
Happy 2012 Everybody!! Thanks for the laugh Stephan! Happy 10th again, and I wish you another great year! You’re off to a avacado-tastic start!!!
PShaw0423 over 12 years ago
Pig’s last remark aside (as usual, he completely misses the point), this strip is a very wise little parable. And it is uplifting: it’s saying that you don’t have to wait for perfection to be happy…you can be happy with what you can actually have, if you decide to be.
LongLiveCartooning over 12 years ago
Pig’s the smartest one today! And hey, Goat: avoid snarky envy. Rat put it on your list of things to strive for, remember? (Reference to a strip from awhile back for anybody who doesn’t get it)
TheSpanishInquisition over 12 years ago
Guacamole is awesome, Elly.
fmasroor over 12 years ago
Feel the sensitivity and handsomeness and adventureousness grow inside you!
cedes29 over 12 years ago
╭ ━ ━ ━ ╮ ╭ ━ ━ ━ ╮ ┈ ┏ ┓ ╭ ━ ━ ━ ╮┗ ━ ━ ╮ ┃ ┃ ╭ ━ ╮ ┃ ┏ ╯ ┃ ┗ ━ ━ ╮ ┃╭ ━ ━ ╯ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┈ ┃ ┃ ┗ ┓ ┃ ╭ ━ ━ ╯ ┃┃ ╭ ━ ━ ╯ ┃ ┃ ┈ ┃ ┃ ┈ ┃ ┃ ┃ ╭ ━ ━ ╯┃ ┗ ━ ━ ┓ ┃ ╰ ━ ╯ ┃ ┈ ┃ ┃ ┃ ┗ ━ ━ ┓┗ ━ ━ ━ ┛ ╰ ━ ━ ━ ╯ ┈ ┗ ┛ ┗ ━ ━ ━ ┛Happy New Year
Marc Schiffres over 12 years ago
A valuable lesson given by Pig.
cork over 12 years ago
I can hang with that!
walruscarver2000 over 12 years ago
They do taste alike…I’mt told.
Sherlock Watson over 12 years ago
Reminds me of an old children’s joke:How do you divide 16 apples among 17 people?Make applesauce.÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷÷Stephan, have you thought about making semi-serious children’s books, like Berkeley Breathed and Gary Larson have done?
Number Three over 12 years ago
Oh, Don’t say that Pig.
There’s someone special out there for everyone!
xxx
Chepi89 over 12 years ago
I’m with Pig. Guacamole is nasty.
drnoobkiller over 12 years ago
Always hated avacado’s
Snoopy_Fan over 12 years ago
I don’t like guacamole either. But chocomole is pretty good…
Gokie5 over 12 years ago
My Aunt Naomi (lived in NC) got together with some neighbor kids and they decided they’d try their first avocado ever. She prepared it, and nobody liked it. She said it was terrible. When she told my mom, Mom started laughing. Seems that Aunt Naomi had peeled off the soft stuff and tried boiling the pit :-D!
abaffuto over 12 years ago
Do I have to convince anyone how great this strip is?
comicnut4636 over 12 years ago
HAPPY LEAP YEAR!!!
bobballewie over 12 years ago
It seems we all more than is realistically possible. We think we need more avocados than would fit in our basket. If you are fortunate enough to have someone in your life who loves you and who strives to meet your basic companionship needs, you should count yourself lucky.
thirdguy over 12 years ago
Some women will learn from this strip, and some will just decide that their bowl doesn’t have enough avocados to make them happy. So they make their guy as miserable as they are. That’s when it is time to leave.
bobballewie over 12 years ago
If you have someone in your life who values you and who strives to meet your basic relationship needs, you should count yourself lucky and embrace them.
lakita_lover over 12 years ago
Rat’s most realistic story yet.
pocounohamster over 12 years ago
We all have Henry Hippo’s in our lives…..but we put up with them anyway…glad Rat is able to share the downside of men ;0) Happy New Year Everyone!
foofee_adventures503 over 12 years ago
I will also strive to be alone 4ever! lol :D
Keno21 over 12 years ago
Wow, it’s amazing that some women actually feel the point of this strip is that men aren’t good enough…Ladies, think about this; if you ever actually found that ‘perfect’ man (as if he could actually exist…), what in the world makes you think he’d settle for YOU??
JR6019 over 12 years ago
I’m surprised that Rat has such a sensible attitude.
vladmac over 12 years ago
Never complain about your spouse’s faults. If it weren’t for those faults, your spouse would be married to someone better than you.
Zebrails over 12 years ago
Anyone notice Pig’s grin looks like Rat’s?And, the moral to this story is… Stop counting the perks if you know you’re dealing with a “Basket Case” of choices.
LegendaryColChuckCrustwoodRet over 12 years ago
“I went to school with a girl named Teresa Tickell.We called her Tess. She hated it.”
LOL! again
shaggy92420 over 12 years ago
i always love Pig’s manic reaction to Rat’s ideas…
bmonk over 12 years ago
Elle is a basket case. But then Harry is a few avacados short of a salad, so they might be perfectly matched.
rgcviper over 12 years ago
Although it isn’t too bad, I’m surprised “crappy” went past the censors..It sure is poetic, though.
DGWillie over 12 years ago
Pig, you’re doing a great job of it, so far…
evanisdaman over 12 years ago
freaks. we all know that avacados are made of human skin
LegendaryColChuckCrustwoodRet over 12 years ago
“I went to school with a girl named Teresa Tickell.We called her Tess. She hated it.”When I was a kid we lived next door to the Scrotums. Their daughter was named Harriett.We called her Harry. She hated it.
tegm over 12 years ago
yeah how funny when it’s the ohter way around, the expectation is that women will try as hard as they can to be the woman a guy will want, and get mad at themselves when they don’t live up to it.
RonBerg13 Premium Member over 12 years ago
Avocados also have pits.
wishingonafallenstar17 over 12 years ago
lololololol :) I<3Pig
egomantheegotistical over 12 years ago
the return of elly elephant!! i want more danny donkey and angry bob and stevie sheep and elly elephant!!!
Alms4Thorby over 12 years ago
Actually, Pastis made good points. You can have adventurous or dependable; non superficial or handsome; sensitive or wealthy. In each case the two traits are mutually exclusive.
lattewoman over 12 years ago
Who says, “You can’t have everything.” Oh yeah. Pastis. How’s that workin’ for you, guy?
Tdog123 over 12 years ago
Wow… what a happy 2012 comic strip… think.
elimarslovescomics over 12 years ago
Will Elly continue to be denied her share of the love?
Goat.Sun about 12 years ago
in a few weeks ill slap rat with a frying pan if he doesnt relax…
KatP Premium Member over 11 years ago
I’m with Pig 100%.
Josequeen almost 3 years ago
Use grapes
CesarSantos almost 3 years ago
You want all those things but you are none of them.