Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for March 31, 2021

They also put the “rate” in Pirate.

The way I played hopscotch is that once I reached the end, I turned around and headed back. I moved the stone on the way. Balance matters. Maybe this is a test to see who has been drinking all the rum.

Tell him you don’t know how to play hopscotch, and you don’t have to walk the plank.

All those people standing around yelling “Hop, Hop!”

I don’t think he’s totally onboard with this game.

Put bells on the end to ring for dinner.

H-m-m-m a send-off with style. Don’t see many of those these days.

maybe the board game he would rather play is chess!

I thought you have to play against someone and the loser has to go over the end. I would challenge the captain.

First the plank, then the plunk!

“Hop the Plank.” Does he get to turn around and hop back when he reaches the end?

This could be an inspiration for an extreme sport.

To extend the theme, place a can to kick at the far edge. (Or, more aprapos, a bucket.)

I would have corrected them and said, "You mean ‘on putting’ ". Same outcome, but one does what one can.

“Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated!”

Oh! I get it! Trump is the evil pirate lying to his victim!

But Captain Uncle Joke is doing a swell job with all of his straightforward sweeping accomplishments at the behest of his wicked Prince BHO!

hop scotch to yer doom.

So really, who the heck was Roger?

Well done, Cap’n Biden.

“Always look on the bright side of death…. just before you draw your terminal breath…”

of course, if wasn’t jolly, where would the fun be in it?

They need to cut a hole around the 10.

The way it is now, they get to turn around and go back.

The physics here is off

Next guy gets a hula hoop.

Johnny, please tell us what parting gifts we have for our contestant.

He’s going to make a meal of it.

Another great chuckle :D

Plank Prank…

Scotch? SCOTCH? That there is a hoprum plank if ever I saw one.

I got a really good laugh from this – and that’s my favorite kind of cartoon.

If you are captured by quantum pirates, you’ll have to walk the Planck!

Not so jolly, how can he pick up his marker with his hands tied?

It’s all fun and games, until someone gets eaten by a shark!

The Party Pirates – cursed precursors of Carnival Cruises. No repeat cruisers.

Does anyone else not read comments on comments?

I wonder if the prisoner is even Scotch?

Shades of a cartoon I’ve seen in which the heads from a guillotine roll down into a bowling lane.

“Except we call it “hoprum” instead of “hopscotch”."

Don’t know who’s supposed to be having all the fun.