Herman by Jim Unger for January 19, 2021

Timely.

Not only do I get pardoned, I get my weight in gold as compensation for the stress of arresting an innocent man.

Just say “Yes!”

With hooded eyes, glasses are useless .

Why, yes! Yes it does!!

“Nah. It says ’Don’t forget to pick up milk and eggs on the way home.’”

Would I ever lie to you?

IQ test for the condemned…

My wife likes to buy grotesque, “1950’s Florida Female Tourist” glasses just to annoy my son. Out granddaughters think they’re cool – as long as they are not out in public with her when she wears them.

I’ve borrowed them a couple of times, usually to add a tip to the bill when at a restaurant. I glare at the waiter and say, “Laugh and you get 5%.”

Well, er. . .um. . . yes! I believe it does. Be seein’ ya’

Why, yes…Yes, it does!

Maybe it’s even to the right address.

“Yes, it does, this is great.”

“Thanks, that IS great, it’s for tomorrow’s execution, now I can plan to take tomorrow off.”

Why yes, yes it does.

Winston Zeddemore: Ray, when someone asks you if you’re a god, you say “YES”!

“Pardoned? No, that’d cost you $2 million!”

Yes.

And remember the penalty for perjury.

You might want to ask someone a bit more impartial.

Yes, it does……

I don’t know. I never learned how to read. Lets ask a member of the mob waiting to witness the execution what it says.

Why, yes — yes it does!

no, really crucifixion (Life of Brian).

why, yes, yes, it does

“What? No, it doesn’t say anything like that. Why would I be — Oh, I mean, yes, yes, sure that’s what it says . . . "

“Yes, yes it does.”