Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 15, 2016

If she doesn’t want the job, Scioscia can outsource it to some guy in Bangalore.

Chelle and Stephan have a strange resemblance. Creepy.

Is there a reason Rat hasn’t hit Cartoon Boy with a baseball bat for that one?

I CAN’T EVEN SAY IT ONE TIME FAST!

How do you come up with these steeply punchlines, Mr. Pastis?

… and I shtill don’t understand.

As long as she does it by the seashore.

O.K., Steph. I got a contract out for a guy to twist your tongue!

She lives in the Sechelles.

Chelle shall see Hell if she sells out.

I want some of what Pastis has been smoking.

well done

Just once, from that dumb Pig, is enough.

Groan!

“it-it-it”What’s so hard about that?

Why is there an extraneous “so” after Chelle? Grammatically it doesn’t make any sense, or was she supposed have a last name in the first panel? and I agree with Johnathan, surprised Pastis didn’t have her from the Seychelles.

how do i get the knot out of my tongue?

I don’t think you can even WRITE that three times.

And on the weekends she sells sea shells by the sea shore.

My aching tongue!

I’d like to see a verbal duel between Cartoon-Boy and the Fox in Socks.

…i can’t even READ it through without having to backtrack.

Pathetic…

get tired of not being paid enough, post something offensive…then delete it later. Shouldn’t be too hard to offend a bunch of people over nothing.

Anybody who doesn’t have a lisp try to say this will suddenly develop one.You wait.xxx

Wow my brain hurts

Rat? Goat? Pig? Will no one rid me of this pun-ishing Cartoon-Boy?!

How is Scioscia supposed to be pronounced?

I couldn’t say it once let alone three times.

Yes, it CAN be said last three times. With practice.

How hard can it be to say it 3 times fast?..s̷̸̱̦̙̖̽ͣͬ͑ͬ̇̕͢͝o̠͉̗͋ͩ͗ͤ͛ͫ̅͟͡ͅ ̰͂ͅͅ͏̴̷̶̮̙̮͙́͗͗̌ͮ̃s̸̵̸̺̯̦̲̦͉̹͛̌͂̐̿ͩ̌͡h̵͕̟̲̱̱̥̀͂̆͌̕o͍͉ͨ̈́u̓ͩ̿̓̉̀̓̓͢҉l̽̄̅͟d̛̝̟̪͇͌̂͊̂ͬ̂͊̚͢͠ ̧̹̝̲̘̜͔͍̪̪̒̅͑̍ͮ͢͠ç̲͍h͙͍̲͕̜̝̞̱̲̟̓̅͒ͤ̄ͪ͜͡e̠̬͔̯̦͓̫ͯ̇̓̈̍ͦ̿ͫ̇ḻ̤͎ͭ͢l̺̇͏̭̳́e̵̯̹͇͊ͭ̚҉̥̰̙̽͢s̵̳̘̾ͣ͐o̵̱͓͈̎͒̌ͫ̀͛̏ ̭̹̙̲ͬs̯̣͈̱̙̩̝̭͒̊h̳̠̅ͧͫ͆̊͑̏ͩ̎͜͢͞i̱̇ͅḽ̷̵̢̧̧͕̗̫̮̰̓͛͂ͪ͂̀̕ͅl̮̪ͣ̄ͭͥ́̆͡҉̜ ̵̰̙̬̱̥̠͙ͥ́̇̔ͧ͐̽͛͘͘͜ś̡̪͈̥̒ͬͧ̈͢͞č̴̯̟̰̫͒̎ͣ͠͏̴̵̠̈́ị̣̰̱̍ͅo̴̶̡̡͓͔̖͇ͣ͛̊̄̀ͬ͑ͫͧͦͣ͘s͉̦̹͔̜͔ͭ̈́ͫ̆͌̕͏ͫ͌c̵̦̬̪̃̆͂̂ͬͩ͜͜ǐ̯̼̱̑̓̕ḁ̷̠͌̔͗ͦ̈́̃҉̵ ̧̼̟̝̲ͭͯ̀͊͋ͭ̄̃̂͞s̴̵̡̫̫̯ͦ̓ọ̡͓̘̹̭́́̒͂̀̏̈́͝c̹ͅi̧͐̎̂a̢̯͉͂ͧͭͪ͡͞ͅl̞̯̝̒ͦ͋ͤ͐̂̍͘ ͙̝̤̟̝̤̬̃́͘͞m̵̧̹̺͕ͣ͂ed̳͛ỉ̷̯͙̫̬͓̝̩͍ͩ̂͛ͭaͭ̊?͏̳̘̩̝̩͕́̈́̍͑͗͘s̷̸̱̦̙̖̽ͣͬ͑ͬ̇̕͢͝o̠͉̗͋ͩ͗ͤ͛ͫ̅͟͡ͅ ̰͂ͅͅ͏̴̷̶̮̙̮͙́͗͗̌ͮ̃s̸̵̸̺̯̦̲̦͉̹͛̌͂̐̿ͩ̌͡h̵͕̟̲̱̱̥̀͂̆͌̕o͍͉ͨ̈́u̓ͩ̿̓̉̀̓̓͢҉l̽̄̅͟d̛̝̟̪͇͌̂͊̂ͬ̂͊̚͢͠ ̧̹̝̲̘̜͔͍̪̪̒̅͑̍ͮ͢͠ç̲͍h͙͍̲͕̜̝̞̱̲̟̓̅͒ͤ̄ͪ͜͡e̠̬͔̯̦͓̫ͯ̇̓̈̍ͦ̿ͫ̇ḻ̤͎ͭ͢l̺̇͏̭̳́e̵̯̹͇͊ͭ̚҉̥̰̙̽͢s̵̳̘̾ͣ͐o̵̱͓͈̎͒̌ͫ̀͛̏ ̭̹̙̲ͬs̯̣͈̱̙̩̝̭͒̊h̳̠̅ͧͫ͆̊͑̏ͩ̎͜͢͞i̱̇ͅḽ̷̵̢̧̧͕̗̫̮̰̓͛͂ͪ͂̀̕ͅl̮̪ͣ̄ͭͥ́̆͡҉̜ ̵̰̙̬̱̥̠͙ͥ́̇̔ͧ͐̽͛͘͘͜ś̡̪͈̥̒ͬͧ̈͢͞č̴̯̟̰̫͒̎ͣ͠͏̴̵̠̈́ị̣̰̱̍ͅo̴̶̡̡͓͔̖͇ͣ͛̊̄̀ͬ͑ͫͧͦͣ͘s͉̦̹͔̜͔ͭ̈́ͫ̆͌̕͏ͫ͌c̵̦̬̪̃̆͂̂ͬͩ͜͜ǐ̯̼̱̑̓̕ḁ̷̠͌̔͗ͦ̈́̃҉̵ ̧̼̟̝̲ͭͯ̀͊͋ͭ̄̃̂͞s̴̵̡̫̫̯ͦ̓ọ̡͓̘̹̭́́̒͂̀̏̈́͝c̹ͅi̧͐̎̂a̢̯͉͂ͧͭͪ͡͞ͅl̞̯̝̒ͦ͋ͤ͐̂̍͘ ͙̝̤̟̝̤̬̃́͘͞m̵̧̹̺͕ͣ͂ed̳͛ỉ̷̯͙̫̬͓̝̩͍ͩ̂͛ͭaͭ̊?͏̳̘̩̝̩͕́̈́̍͑͗͘s̷̸̱̦̙̖̽ͣͬ͑ͬ̇̕͢͝o̠͉̗͋ͩ͗ͤ͛ͫ̅͟͡ͅ ̰͂ͅͅ͏̴̷̶̮̙̮͙́͗͗̌ͮ̃s̸̵̸̺̯̦̲̦͉̹͛̌͂̐̿ͩ̌͡h̵͕̟̲̱̱̥̀͂̆͌̕o͍͉ͨ̈́u̓ͩ̿̓̉̀̓̓͢҉l̽̄̅͟d̛̝̟̪͇͌̂͊̂ͬ̂͊̚͢͠ ̧̹̝̲̘̜͔͍̪̪̒̅͑̍ͮ͢͠ç̲͍h͙͍̲͕̜̝̞̱̲̟̓̅͒ͤ̄ͪ͜͡e̠̬͔̯̦͓̫ͯ̇̓̈̍ͦ̿ͫ̇ḻ̤͎ͭ͢l̺̇͏̭̳́e̵̯̹͇͊ͭ̚҉̥̰̙̽͢s̵̳̘̾ͣ͐o̵̱͓͈̎͒̌ͫ̀͛̏ ̭̹̙̲ͬs̯̣͈̱̙̩̝̭͒̊h̳̠̅ͧͫ͆̊͑̏ͩ̎͜͢͞i̱̇ͅḽ̷̵̢̧̧͕̗̫̮̰̓͛͂ͪ͂̀̕ͅl̮̪ͣ̄ͭͥ́̆͡҉̜ ̵̰̙̬̱̥̠͙ͥ́̇̔ͧ͐̽͛͘͘͜ś̡̪͈̥̒ͬͧ̈͢͞č̴̯̟̰̫͒̎ͣ͠͏̴̵̠̈́ị̣̰̱̍ͅo̴̶̡̡͓͔̖͇ͣ͛̊̄̀ͬ͑ͫͧͦͣ͘s͉̦̹͔̜͔ͭ̈́ͫ̆͌̕͏ͫ͌c̵̦̬̪̃̆͂̂ͬͩ͜͜ǐ̯̼̱̑̓̕ḁ̷̠͌̔͗ͦ̈́̃҉̵ ̧̼̟̝̲ͭͯ̀͊͋ͭ̄̃̂͞s̴̵̡̫̫̯ͦ̓ọ̡͓̘̹̭́́̒͂̀̏̈́͝c̹ͅi̧͐̎̂a̢̯͉͂ͧͭͪ͡͞ͅl̞̯̝̒ͦ͋ͤ͐̂̍͘ ͙̝̤̟̝̤̬̃́͘͞m̵̧̹̺͕ͣ͂ed̳͛ỉ̷̯͙̫̬͓̝̩͍ͩ̂͛ͭaͭ̊?͏̳̘̩̝̩͕́̈́̍͑͗͘

So, Americans pronounce it SO-sha but Italians pronounce it SHO-sha.