Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 31, 2020

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    BE THIS GUY  over 3 years ago

    Rat, you’ll be shot dead before you can get close enough to use that.

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    MatthewHecht  over 3 years ago

    I use that weapon all the time. I once defeated 999,999,999,999,999,999,999 tigers with one.

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    B UTTONS  over 3 years ago

    Rat, you’ll get maced and spayed before you leave your house with your mace.

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    BasilBruce  over 3 years ago

    Ever see the 1980s TV show The Charmings? Snow carried that kind of “mace” too.

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    sirbadger  over 3 years ago

    If you’ve never used one before, there is a risk of hitting yourself.

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    halibaitor  over 3 years ago

    Rat should be avoided on all days of the week.

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    hariseldon59  over 3 years ago

    Rat days and Mondays always get me down.

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    hariseldon59  over 3 years ago

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    Gent  over 3 years ago

    Yes. Some still use those to beat infesting rats.

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    GROG Premium Member over 3 years ago

    So he’s the one hoarding all the toilet paper, paper towels, etc.

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    Breadboard  over 3 years ago

    Rat did you have your coffee yet ? Might take the edge off :-) … Croc Power !

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    pekelopan Premium Member over 3 years ago

    Are we on team Goat or team Rat?

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    Troglodyte  over 3 years ago

    Deaths in Rat’s neighbourhood will soon “spike”, and Covid-19 will have nothing to do with it!

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    jpayne4040  over 3 years ago

    It sounds good in theory, Goat. The problem is pulling it execution!

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    iggyman  over 3 years ago

    Like the Mammas and Pappas said Monday, Monday can’t trust that day!

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    tripwire45  over 3 years ago

    I’m sure Hawkman does, but then, I was always impressed by an alien, resurrected hero who can fly and uses medieval weapons.

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    Purple People Eater  over 3 years ago

    I’m already upbeat, and I want to make sure everyone else is to, so I plan on beating everyone up.

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    Ellis97  over 3 years ago

    You should avoid people like Rat. That’s for sure.

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    Andrew Sleeth  over 3 years ago

    “Do people still use these?”

    No, people don’t, but cops use them all the time.

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    Reader  over 3 years ago

    So that’s what the plague was all about, huh.

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    MartinPerry1  over 3 years ago

    That’s a weapon that takes too much practice. Most beginners begin twirling it about and then end by smacking the back of their own head. Being a knight was a full time job.

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    Otis Rufus Driftwood  over 3 years ago

    Rat’s attitude about Mondays makes Garfield look cheerful.

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    LaughterIsJoyMuliplied  over 3 years ago

    I’m beginning to believe there are times when it would be very useful to have Rat beside you — not behind but beside you.

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    Northgalus2002  over 3 years ago

    As far as I’m concerned, Rat is a pessimist, Pig is an optimist and Goat is a realist. I am choosing to have Goat’s viewpoint that this will ultimately end and we will move on. And we should concentrate on what we can do in the meantime (i.e. wearing masks, social distancing, voting, etc.) and realizing we have no control over what others do. The pessimist says, “We’re in a long, dark, tunnel!” The optimist says, “Hey, I see light at the end of the tunnel!” The realist says, “If you’re seeing light at the end, that’s great. But right now we’re still in the tunnel!”

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    Steve Prime  over 3 years ago

    Antifa uses similar weapons. Carrying one might not be worth it.

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    zeexenon  over 3 years ago

    When I took long weekends off, it always included Monday. Friday’s are the best.

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    Zebrastripes  over 3 years ago

    RATS lost it….

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    marilynnbyerly  over 3 years ago

    Technically, it’s a flail, not a mace, because of the chain. But, no, I wouldn’t recommend it because you’re more likely to hurt yourself than someone else. As a short being, Rat is also at a disadvantage because his reach is far less than most of the other characters in the neighborhood unless he uses a sneak attack. Projectile weapons are his best attack. Just ask Guard Duck.

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    Sisyphos  over 3 years ago

    Yo, Rat, my man! If the mace works for you, by all means use it!

    Reminds me of a great gory tale in pre-code (early 1950s) Weird Comics (I think it was), about the Black Knight and how he got his title….

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    DCBakerEsq  over 3 years ago

    On Mondays, I stockpile ammunition and toilet paper.

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    Boots at the Boar Premium Member over 3 years ago

    I’m with rat. All your base are belong to us.

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    RobinHood  over 3 years ago

    I need one of those for my skittle bowl.

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    bob.gaston45  over 3 years ago

    Yes you can still use it. They are handy for walking home from the grocery store.

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    AngoraRabbit13  over 3 years ago

    Some guys you should avoid on mondays… including Garfield

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    asrialfeeple  over 3 years ago

    I heard Rat’s toy is called a Surprise. It certainly isn’t a pleasant one.

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    RohanDemon  over 3 years ago

    Taking a Mace/ flail to a gunfight

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