Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for November 30, 2023

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    rmremail  6 months ago

    That’s awful lot of mourners, for a lawyer.

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    sirbadger  6 months ago

    Eventually a human or robot will dig him up, so he won’t be there for eternity.

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    Ubintold  6 months ago

    At least it wasn’t “under the ocean.”

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    saobadao  6 months ago

    My dad was a lawyer. One of the most ethical individuals I have ever known. My father-in-law, a realtor, would on occasion say terrible things about lawyers and would preface his remarks saying, I know your dad was a lawyer, but….as if that made it okay to disparage other lawyers but not make it personal, gah! As if realtors are a higher form of humanity.

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    PraiseofFolly  6 months ago

    Is that coffin specially iron-clad … or is it just boiler-plate?

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    phritzg Premium Member 6 months ago

    That lawyer may have made the world a better place – by leaving it.

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    walstib Premium Member 6 months ago

    It can go both ways. My sister was a bit overbearing with my mother’s estate lawyer, and after 20 years relationship with our family, the law firm fired us as clients. They charged nothing for services already provided, just to stop having to deal with my sister.

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    mourdac Premium Member 6 months ago

    No loopholes in that contract.

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    Differentname  6 months ago

    “A totally nondenominational prayer: Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that I be forgiven for anything I may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness. Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to insure any possible benefit for which I may be eligible after the destruction of my body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be, in such a manner as to insure said benefit. I ask this in my capacity as your elected intermediary between yourself and that which may not be yourself, but which may have an interest in the matter of your receiving as much as it is possible for you to receive of this thing, and which may in some way be influenced by this ceremony. Amen.”― Roger Zelazny, Creatures of Light and Darknes

    If you’ve never read Zelazny, you’re missing out. If you have read him, you should be telling people about him.

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    dflak  6 months ago

    My cousin was a lawyer. He made fun of his own profession. “So this guy takes a dive on my client’s property …”

    I took one course in law myself in grad school. It was geared towards engineers so it focused on intellectual property and product liability. What I learned was justice is proportional to the amount of money you are willing to spend on it.

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    ladykat  6 months ago

    Encase him in concrete so he can’t escape.

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    HOTLOTUS1  6 months ago

    they’re just all lawyers

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    sandpiper  6 months ago

    Disparage them how you will. Just be sure the one you need hasn’t read your insults.

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    monya_43  6 months ago

    A ironclad contract that no one can get out of, not even a shyster lawyer.

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    PlatudimusAtom Premium Member 6 months ago

    Just happy to learn they didn’t put him in escrow.

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    mindjob  6 months ago

    Not to exceed eternity. Hard to enforce

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    Mike Baldwin creator 6 months ago

    Buried in paperwork.

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    jvscanlan Premium Member 6 months ago

    How’d he die?

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    T...  6 months ago

    That reminds me, how many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb – none, they all are writing insurance briefs and contracts for the one they hire to do it…

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    [Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce]  6 months ago

    If he’s with DC or Marvel comics, he won’t be dead long

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    christelisbetty  6 months ago

    ..and that is before the fine print….

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    NoSleepTil_BKLYN  6 months ago

    …Good Start…!

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    keenanthelibrarian  6 months ago

    He/she, being the party of the first part …

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    Richard S Russell Premium Member 6 months ago

    That one large guy in the back might’ve been responsible for there needing to be a requiem in the first place.

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    Bilan  6 months ago

    The length of the term is nonnegotiable.

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    Bill Löhr Premium Member 6 months ago

    To eternity and beyond.

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