Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for September 18, 2022

I think we just found out what Zonker’s middle name is.

“Hey, what if those crop circles are just ads for Target?” — Dennis Miller

“I’m my PARENTS! I’m my PARENTS !!!”

Instead of trampling the circles, use a torch and burn them in. That way you can sit around and inhale.

Oh c’mon … who bookkeeps using paper ledgers anymore?

That idiot should be jettisoned from this strip, and pronto!!!

Leslie King Geral Ford “Zonker” of Walden

seriously Zonk. You used to commune and talk to your crop. Now you just leave it to be violated by your nephew.

Oh dear, spot on! Perhaps he will hear you and rescind on his permission.

What’s a little destruction of property between neighbours?

Doonesbury is still great every week, but I miss the relaxed smiling Zonker. Seems like several years since we’ve seen even a grin or smirk, let alone a surfer smile…

No, Zonker’s middle name is “Wimp”!!

Make the crop circles in the neighbor’s crops like a respectable vandal.

He didn’t even have to start singing: “Dear Prudence…”!

Dear Zonker Prudence Harris, won’t you come out to play?

Even after the people that made the crop circles admitted to it, there are people who insist it was done by UFOs. The reasoning: “That’s what ‘They’ want you to think.”

How about harvesting the crop as you go through so it’s not wasted?

If you would spend as much money as you will lose on a prank to entertain your neighbor, go for it. It’s worth it.

Zonker remembered he has a reputation to uphold and prudence never played a part in his past.

Watch out, kid…you’re risking triggering a full-blown identity crisis.

Also, shouldn’t that be a surfboard?

Amazing to see Zonker as the responsible one…

One of my favorite gags in the “Invader Zim” animated series is cows rolling around in a field making the crop circles.

All it takes is some string, maybe a board, someone with too much time on their hands and no respect for the hardworking farmer.

I have a vague memory of Zonker’s middle initial being T, as in “Zonker T. Harris.” But that memory may be false.

Trying to look it up, however, I learned that, per Doonesbury: The Musical, his full name is Edgar Zonker Harris. I don’t know if that’s considered canon.

Outdoor crops in Colorado at this time of year? Rain is not a pot growers friend when the buds are out.

Crop circles are seen from space, so the neighbors must be able to fly

Am I the only one who thinks that rope looks like a noose in the opening panels?

This has me thinking. Zipper is Zonker’s nephew. Do we ever see Zonker’s brother or sister who is Zipper’s parent?

Ha. PHISH.

Well played.

Dear Prudence, can you come out and play?

First time I’ve seen Zonker’s eyes wide open!

To get the straight scoop on crop circles (as well as ESP, homeopathy, chemtrails, chakras, and endless other flights of fancy), I recommend a subscription to Skeptical Inquirer magazine. You can look up particular past articles (including ones about crop circles) at their website, skepticalinquirer.org.

Am I the only one who’s noticed that overall the men on “Doonesbury” have aged a lot better than the women?

In a sign of how things are changing, today I saw an ad on YouTube for a cover to get sufficient dark periods to cause plants to flower. At first I couldn’t figure out what they talking about, then I saw what the plants were.

It’s amazing how Zonker spent years lazing about, sponging off his parents, pretending to babysit Sam for BD & Boopsie, and being a “professional tanner” aka lying around in the sun, and then finally found his true calling that he’s actually willing to work at!

A little more that 20 years ago an F1 tornado came through our yard and damaged several trees before continuing on into our neighbor’s wheat field, creating crop circles. Our neighbor’s response was to put up “No trespassing” signs at the edge of our property. So while I’m pretty sure the fancy geometrical circles are the work of vandals, it’s also possible that the simpler ones are made by Mother Nature.

The terror of being thought of as “establishment” rears its ugly head

Am I mistaken, or do the first two panels reprise a way older opening with Zonker and his surfboard?