Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for December 08, 2021

You’re regifted.

Moldy.

Hard as a rock. All the time. Even for the young Meg Nog that is too much.

Soak him in rum. He’ll be quite the new man.

Some people are like that. They are well-seasoned.

Some people are (like) fruitcakes.

i love fruitcake, but it is best served warmed up a little

All fruitcakes can be regifted to my “Home for the Unappreciated Baked Good.” Each item we receive will be lovingly and thoughtfully savored. Probably with coffee.

Makes one wonder how old the oldest fruitcake is.

The scientists who tried to create cold fusion got it wrong. The secret is to stack up old fruitcakes until they reach critical mass.

(sigh!) NOBODY wants Fruitcake at Xmas!

If everybody hates fruit cakes why are they even sold? Are they joke gifts?

I keep saying that to myself too. Sigh.

Fruitcake the gift that is forever. Not like most stuff today, Fruitcake will last forever. From B.C. to the Space age of Brewster Rockit and beyond.

Meg was also frigid.

Not seasoned – - – seasonal.

Old fruitcakes never die. You just pour another half- cup of brandy on top before passing it on.

When I do make a fruitcake, and that isn’t often, it only lasts a few weeks. It’s an icebox fruitcake, heavy on candied fruit and pecans.

So freddys a sugar daddy?

No Brewster, he is a door stop.

Poor Meg Nog, her first Christmas was her last Christmas. It was a relationship that was never meant to last.

Seasoned with rum.

Usually I find fruitcake jokes…er…stale. But I laughed out loud at this one. A welcome variation.

Many times

To enjoy a fruitcake, eat just a pinch with a mint tea, and contemplate the season.

Come to me. I like fruitcake.

(At work, they left the note telling all that everything in the freezer and refrigerator will be thrown out at the end of work before Winter Break (sometimes referred to Christmas Break but includes New Year’s…). I said, “You mean I can have whatever is still in there then?” followed by discussions of assorted food poisonings. There are some lovely molds growing there!!)

Apparently, he’s having a mid-life crisis and goes for a hot young girl. What a fruitcake.

But she realized that those years made him hard-crusted and left him.