Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for October 21, 2021

The undertaker buried his doctor, attorney, and financial advisor.

Living Dead prequel

That demanded a rimshot!

Next question would be whether he knows of someone who passed away that was a regular customer.

Well, then make fresh food in your restaurant.

It could be great in his next advertising campaign.

He doesn’t really care so much about bringing them back to life …

… as he is having them die again.

Would that be such a good idea? If they were brought back to life, wouldn’t the undertaker have to refund the fees paid for their previous funeral? (Sign seen at my local funeral parlour, ‘All sales final. No refunds. No Returns!’)

You stab ’em, we slab ’em.

Repeat business from other members of the family…

He wants to un-urn the past? Will he then re-urn the future? Or will all that work go up in ashes?

Check the voter roles in Georgia.

This will be quite the undertaking.

Couldn’t get any new customers?

I hitched a ride and was very Grateful!

So the Wizard of ID, invented Zombies !!!!

Oy! …and so the story goes…the beginning of the greedy business man

Poor judgement there undertaker, the family is the customer. The dead are the product. …yeah I know. My time is coming.

If they demand brains well that won’t end well

Well, he could tuck Dracula in every morning just before dawn in some nice crypt.

Wouldn’t finding a different career be easier?

Jesus raised from the dead and reigns forever!

I picture the undertaker sounding like Vincent Price.

He’s from the covid vaccine companies

I would like to ask the mortician about his “lay away” plan…

Uh oh

He should try to get jazz musicians as customers. They’re cool cats.

Bury me once, shame on you, bury me twice, shame on me.

Jesus Christ raised Lazarus from the dead. Lazarus had to die a second time. When I die and my soul is resting in Heaven for eternity, do not bring me back!

“Lazarus had to die a second time.”

Or did he. There is no record of it.

Hebrews 9:27 And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:

Yep, that’s the problem with undertakers, no repeat customers, although there appears to be an inexhaustible supply.

it is not the dead people who are the customers it is the friends/family that are the customers