Tail-slap contusions, bites, then finally dragged underwater for a breath-holding contest. (Beavers can remain underwater between breaths for up to 15 minutes.)
It was the cell phone tower made to look like a tree that set them off. Nobody knows why they chose to attack the family of the Bat Mat Factory employee of the month. It is assumed that they were just the nearest people to the beavers at the time when they flew into their murderous rage. In lieu of flowers, it is suggested that donations be made to the coats for kids program at the Froglandia Beaver Pelt Coat Company.
You WOOD think those DAMNED beavers would be more careful! He was walking by the pond, minding his own business, when all of a sudden, out of the pond comes three Bucky beavers and started to attack him, bitting him and smacking him with their mighty tails. He lost his balance and they dragged him through the murky waters till they used him to finish off their work. He wasn’t found for three days when a hiker spotted him at the front of the dam….the water falling over his lifeless body, entangled in the fortress of stick’s and logs, bugged eyed, and not a Bucky beaver to be found! They all abandoned their home and moved on….no one knows where…this is an unsolved wet cold case for sure! Police are baffled. Any tips or sightings of the Bucky Beavers- gone -wrong-gang, please contact the Forest Rangers office.
The lovely nature sketch provided by Unctuous and Plantem, Froglandia’s leading funeral home and urn dispensary, to comfort family and friends as they contemplate eternity.
Made me think that “SS-Beaver” would be a great name for a submarine … but using Gaggle for “submarine names” (U wouldn’t believe the number and diversity of sub names), I found there was a Naval submarine tender, USS-Beaver:
“Beaver was built in 1910 (at a cost of $1,300,000) as a steel-hulled, single-screw, freight and passenger steamer at Newport News, Virginia … She was converted to a submarine tender at the Mare Island Navy Yard and was commissioned there on 1 October 1918” … it served in both World Wars and was decommissioned July 17, 1946 … CaFfEiNe WHEW …!
Who would think that this Currier & Ives setting is inhabited by a vicious rogue band of killer-beavers?
This Friday will be a half-day off in the AM for all Froglandia Bath Mat Factory employees (except for designated emergency maintenance personnel) to attend (either in person or virtually) services for the late employee, Woody Forest.
Donations for a commemorative plaque honoring Woody will be accepted through your shop stewards beginning Monday morning….
Wow, what a way to go! The Bath Mat Factory sure knows how to do a send off! First they give you employee of the month, and award the golden spork, and then Mr. Bigwig Taskmaster gives an eloquent succinct retirement speech (see yesterdays comic), and you are given the rest of the day off to wander the beaver pond and reflect on your accomplishments and prepare yourself for your final contribution and take your rightful place as another brick in the wall, or in this case, bone in the dam. Come sunset, as the beavers are placing the final bits and pieces, the festivities really start to ramp up. What a sight to behold! I can only hope that my retirement will be so comely. I mean, I don’t know who stuck the roman candle in the derrière of the retiree on top of the dam, but nice touch!
Attention, Bath Mat Factory employees! The deadly beavers are still on the loose! We recommend you remain at home, behind locked doors and drawn shades, for an indefinite period!
Randy B Premium Member about 3 years ago
Tail-slap contusions, bites, then finally dragged underwater for a breath-holding contest. (Beavers can remain underwater between breaths for up to 15 minutes.)
Baslim the Beggar Premium Member about 3 years ago
Well, if he hadn’t been trying to feed them branches of fake trees, they might not have been so upset…
The Old Wolf about 3 years ago
That’s what she gets for trying to make off with their wood.
3hourtour Premium Member about 3 years ago
… of course, Fatally Attacked By Beavers was his Froglandia name…
….to the rest of the outside world he was Larry…
…Golly, Wally…
…it was not what he meant when he prayed for a threeway….
… what did the creek say to the beavers?…
…well, I’ll be damned…
…The Beaver Local school system officially protests this cartoon as anti- beaver…
…but you can’t hate someone for liking the same things you do…
…thank you Mz. Burrito for our (almost) daily dose of Frog Applause….
Kaputnik about 3 years ago
Beavers can be quite resentful of even minor success.
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 3 years ago
Jolly good news we can use.
Wanted dead or alive
Trapper John and Jukebox Jive
The 50’s female band Beavers take a bite out crime, McRuff hear.
Brass Orchid Premium Member about 3 years ago
It was the cell phone tower made to look like a tree that set them off. Nobody knows why they chose to attack the family of the Bat Mat Factory employee of the month. It is assumed that they were just the nearest people to the beavers at the time when they flew into their murderous rage. In lieu of flowers, it is suggested that donations be made to the coats for kids program at the Froglandia Beaver Pelt Coat Company.
Zebrastripes about 3 years ago
You WOOD think those DAMNED beavers would be more careful! He was walking by the pond, minding his own business, when all of a sudden, out of the pond comes three Bucky beavers and started to attack him, bitting him and smacking him with their mighty tails. He lost his balance and they dragged him through the murky waters till they used him to finish off their work. He wasn’t found for three days when a hiker spotted him at the front of the dam….the water falling over his lifeless body, entangled in the fortress of stick’s and logs, bugged eyed, and not a Bucky beaver to be found! They all abandoned their home and moved on….no one knows where…this is an unsolved wet cold case for sure! Police are baffled. Any tips or sightings of the Bucky Beavers- gone -wrong-gang, please contact the Forest Rangers office.
coltish1 about 3 years ago
The lovely nature sketch provided by Unctuous and Plantem, Froglandia’s leading funeral home and urn dispensary, to comfort family and friends as they contemplate eternity.
PDawg Premium Member about 3 years ago
Where’s OSHA when you need them?
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 3 years ago
OSU Beavers and the mascot… Hmmmm crime in Hitler…
Plods with ...™ about 3 years ago
I would hate to be killed by a beaver.
Howard'sMyHero about 3 years ago
Made me think that “SS-Beaver” would be a great name for a submarine … but using Gaggle for “submarine names” (U wouldn’t believe the number and diversity of sub names), I found there was a Naval submarine tender, USS-Beaver:
“Beaver was built in 1910 (at a cost of $1,300,000) as a steel-hulled, single-screw, freight and passenger steamer at Newport News, Virginia … She was converted to a submarine tender at the Mare Island Navy Yard and was commissioned there on 1 October 1918” … it served in both World Wars and was decommissioned July 17, 1946 … CaFfEiNe WHEW …!
Sisyphos about 3 years ago
Such a lovely, peaceful-looking country scene!
Who would think that this Currier & Ives setting is inhabited by a vicious rogue band of killer-beavers?
This Friday will be a half-day off in the AM for all Froglandia Bath Mat Factory employees (except for designated emergency maintenance personnel) to attend (either in person or virtually) services for the late employee, Woody Forest.
Donations for a commemorative plaque honoring Woody will be accepted through your shop stewards beginning Monday morning….
willie_mctell about 3 years ago
Sad. Beavers do detest bath mats.
InquireWithin about 3 years ago
Well, I’ll be dammed.
katina.cooper about 3 years ago
That employee must have been a little too hard on the beaver.
Radish the wordsmith about 3 years ago
Lucky Pierre.
6turtle9 about 3 years ago
Wow, what a way to go! The Bath Mat Factory sure knows how to do a send off! First they give you employee of the month, and award the golden spork, and then Mr. Bigwig Taskmaster gives an eloquent succinct retirement speech (see yesterdays comic), and you are given the rest of the day off to wander the beaver pond and reflect on your accomplishments and prepare yourself for your final contribution and take your rightful place as another brick in the wall, or in this case, bone in the dam. Come sunset, as the beavers are placing the final bits and pieces, the festivities really start to ramp up. What a sight to behold! I can only hope that my retirement will be so comely. I mean, I don’t know who stuck the roman candle in the derrière of the retiree on top of the dam, but nice touch!
Randy B Premium Member about 3 years ago
If you think beavers are neat, keen, and the cat’s pajamas, there’s a fillum for you to watch:
https://www.thebeaverbelievers.com/
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 3 years ago
https://youtu.be/rg9QUK7bigQ
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 3 years ago
1 word… AUTOMATION Will prevail in the marriage of replacement. The worker will not be missed from beaver murder.
Sisyphos about 3 years ago
Day 2!
Attention, Bath Mat Factory employees! The deadly beavers are still on the loose! We recommend you remain at home, behind locked doors and drawn shades, for an indefinite period!
Your pay will be docked for missed work shifts….