FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for June 06, 2020

the courgettes are going to run their course

Do as Opal does in “Pickles”: Leave them on the neighbors’ doorsteps in the middle of the night.

Is this where obsession with zucchini started?

I planted a bunch of seeds but only one came up. I planted a bunch more and one more came up. I’m afraid to plant more. One successful plant is enough for me!

And what is the point of growing zucchini in the first place? It’s not as if you can eat the things.

Don’t know how big our neighbor, Mamasan’s. zucchini was but hubby asked her daughter if she was going to feed the whole block with it.

In the 80’s a friend of ours was in her garden picking more zucchini, again. It was a bumper crop year. She looked up and saw a bear at the end of her garden. She thought it might like she zucchini, after all, she had too much already. She lifted some zucchini and was about to throw it toward the bear when the bear took one look at the zucchini, turned around and ran away. Obviously he had had too much already, too.

Well, Paige’s boyfriend problem is temporarily solved….

I’ve heard if you put coconut oil in the pan before you cook zucchini, it’s easier to scrape into the trash bin.

Okra’s easy to grow, too.

You can easily identify a person who has no friends or acquaintances that have gardens. They are the one buying zucchini.

After some googling, I found out that a single zucchini plant will yeald about 6-10 pounds of zucchinis, and that a single zucchini weighs about 7 ounces, which means that each plant will bear about 20 medium sized zucchinis. Andy’s 45 plants will therefore yeald about 900 zucchinis.

I have a brown thumb. There is no danger of me having a bumper crop of anything except crab grass and weeds.

I heard in MI one summer that you had to keep your car windows up and doors locked or someone would fill it with zucchini.

some prankster replaced the zucchini identifier with a watermelon one so I had 4 hills which proved to me world hunger IS a HOAX! 10 acres of this could feed the world!

this hits the big problem with zucchini (which we love to eat) its feast or famine , you will have nothing for a month but flowers and leaves next day there are 32 fruit to eat, sand if you let some continue to grow they get massive and taste terrible. so your friends get a hand full each lol

In small towns in the South, most people only lock their houses and car doors in the summer to keep neighbors from leaving their ridiculous largess of zuchs, cukes, and yellow squash inside. The fear of cucurbits is real, folks!

The key with zucchini is to pick early. Ones the size of your arm don’t taste as good and weigh pounds. If you gather them when they’re 8 inches or less then you have better product and it’s not so overwhelming.

Love this arc…

How do you tell someone has no friends? They are buying zucchini in the store…

I feel sorry for Andy’s family..they will be eating this the rest of their lives..probably paired with eggplant and tofu.

I’ve got a recipe for zucchini.

1. Graciously accept from your neighbor the zucchini he planted much more than he caould possibly use.2. Peel the zucchini,m aking sure to save the peelings for your neighbor uses to grow the big beautiful tomatoes he uses to brie you to take the zucchini.3. Cut the peeled zuccchini into 1-inch cubes. Boil the cut zucchini in unsalted water.4, Mash the zucchini as you would potatoes, but don’t add any butter or cream. Allow to cool.5. After dark put the mashed zucchini on your neighbor’s compost pile.

For a vegetarian, Andi sure is ignorant about vegetables.