Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for July 24, 2022

Not very observant are you.

That unicorn is too small to be a one horned rhinoceros so she will probably point that out to you and ask for something else.

I think we are related … we have the same family apparently

there would be a turtle with a unicorn too

Finally! One off-handed comment about turtles and that was all I have been given for years. Free at last!

Hope she kept the receipt !

You did that on purpose did you not.

I hate to say but that flattened one, on the floor behind her, looks like it was run over by a truck.

At least it isn’t another $#! turtle!

A clueless friend once gave me an unflattering sweater that didn’t go with anything I owned.

As I opened the gift box, she exclaimed proudly….

“I was so glad to find it for you, because you don’t seem to have anything in that style or color!”

My bet is that the gift giver has pink unicorns all over her house.

A turtle lover, but nothing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

a little slow?

I do know people who collect “themes.”

I do too. I have several sake sets and I have about two dozen coffee mugs: all from the various squadrons and companies to which I once belonged. One of them celebrates the 25th anniversary of the Air Force which is now approaching age 75.

Start a new collection. Is there anything else in life worth collecting?

I could use that “Uni-pig” for my collection!

Oy

Maybe if it had a helmet…

Somebody once gave her a green turtle. She put it on a shelf to be polite. Everyone thought she liked it & gave her green turtles. She’d always wanted a pink unicorn. They lived happily ever after.

Turtles, she likes turtles.

Clueless.

I can’t tell you how many times I have been gifted earrings for pierced ears. (1) I do not have pierced ears. (2) I never wear earrings.

I’m guessing frogs?

The oblivious gift giver has had her head in her shell her whole life.

Duh!!!

One of my co-workers said one time that she just didn’t understand how I had such good taste when picking presents for her, but poor taste in shopping for myself. I did a lot of tongue-biting and said that I just tried to pick things she liked for her. She said that was a good idea; she usually bought presents she liked for others.

talk about tone deaf

It’s the thought that counts. Just pretend the pink unicorn is a turtle.

She must be blind.

There are two models of this type of collector: one where you can get them anything “turtle” (in this example) and they’ll happily take it; OR collectors that are SO thorough and specific that you are essentially barred from getting them ANYTHING “turtle” because they only have six very specific gaps in their collection, and that’s ALL they’re looking for that they know of (think also Beanie Babie collectors, Hummel figure collectors, gaming card/baseball card/ comic book/ sci-fi collectors, etc.).

Once there was a comic of Garfield pointing at a tennis racket and saying “It takes guts!”. I liked the thought so I bought a little PVC (about 2 inches tall) of Garfield pointing at a tennis racket and put it on a shelf with other knickknacks. Christmas came and I got 3 more Garfields plus Garfield cards.

If this person puts out that unicorn, that will be the next batch of presents.