Tom Toles for March 27, 2020

He never cared a whit about cleaning up the government. His primary concern is enriching himself… unless it’s making himself feel better / important. National debt means nothing to him, obviously… but I’m sure he’s thinking about how to get his and Jared’s hands on some of those $trillions.

The “Book of Trump” will end in Chapter 11….

Two trillion more to the deficit, and most of it goes to corporations that don’t pay taxes, great.

Donnie walked out on his own presser again today after 30 minutes of looking, and sounding, like death, and mostly babbling incoherently. The MSM has made no mention of it. Alternative sources, and people who actually watched it, are the only sources of info. Apparently, and blissfully, the world is now officially ignoring him…

He’s pissed because COVID-19 is getting more attention than him. He doesn’t like to lose the spotlight!!

DC comics will be deeply incensed, and nauseated.

Now the asshats at fake news, and the loony right wing websites are all piling on Dr. Fauci for making dumpty look bad. lou dobbs is practically having a stroke over it. Good. I hope they all get it.

From the toxic D.C. Swampy bums, something dripping this way comes: “Trump Thing.” It carries the Pachyderm Party thru the deepening muck and miasma of rising deficits, and we hear:

.

“The Wall Street Wile Sing”

A loose imitation of “Wild Thing” (Apologies to The Troggs / Chip Taylor)

Trump Thing, you’ll make our stocks sing,

You’ll make every-thang mellow, Trump Thing.

Trump Thing, we now just Like you,

But we wanna be true-blue,

So another two trillion might

Make us Love ya, Babe.

.

Trump Thing, you made the Dow swing,

It made a real bummer, Trump Thing!

Trump Thing, you said you’d save us:

“Just wait, Mitch will waive us

From big loss and corporate shame.”

You said you’d carry us through.

.

Trump Thing, our bottom lines would “ding”

From this bail-out bill thing.

So come on, come on, Trump Thing,

Send checks, send checks, Trump Thing.

Shake the Fed piggy and make it squeal,

Shake it, break it, rake it, doooo it!

.

Trump Thing, carry us through like before,

Don’t let us get burned once more.

Come on, and ssssssock the dough to us again,

Give us an obscene bail-out bargain.

Make it quick with majority rule,

And Man, we’ll worship you!

.

Trump Thing, you’ll make our stocks sing,

You’ll turn things back to same-old, Trump Thing.

Shake it, shake it, Trump Thing!

Come on, come on, squeeze it,

Come on, come on, send it,

Come on, come on, spray it!

We think we Lust you, Trump Thing …

Sewer King. Make America a S**thole Kuntry.

You would think that knowing that the resident’s proclivity for bankruptcy would dissuade the GOP from taking his advice, but they seem to let greed be their guide. Instead of having a rigorously enforced lockdown for 3 weeks and a manageable relationship with the effects of SARS-Cov-2 and a functional economy, doing nothing will incur months of damage to the economy and society. Has the resident given up the idea of reelection?

The party deserves to die for cowtowing to this patently obvious con man.

“The Art of the Swindle”

Shark bait…ooooohaha….

{Off-topic:}

Trump-themed Tropes – {4 beats/line, then 3}

The virus makes us each a recluse,

depressed that we’re governed by brutish Yahoos

and dismayed by incessant Trump-era news.

We’re beaten. We’re on the ropes; -

- the non-stop Trump-themed tropes

have dashed our forlorn hopes.

[{ … to the Editor: Close-enuff rhyme-wise? }]

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

If you’re going to say any swamp was drained under this administration, you’d have to admit it was just to turn it into a cesspool

Work in Progress; actively demonstrating the fallacy of “Too Big To Fail.”

So who knew that Elephants and PIGS like to wallow in the same pits of ooze??

And the bill passed unanimously in the Senate. Because crumbs for the people.

“Deficit spending is a liberal disease.” Where have I heard this sentiment expressed?

Great comments today – as always! But the most disturbing part of all this is that 49-60% of the country, depending upon the poll, think Agent Orange is handling this mess well? What the…….????

Dow down 842 points, the Trump admin has been a miserable failure.

Due to Trump’s incompetence the whole country needs to be on lock down.

I’ve never understood how the victims of Trump’s cult can NOT understand that Trump and all of his fellow swamp things spend all of their time throwing elbows at each other while they slop at the public trough. Maybe William Barr held their heads under water in the swamp, and the resulting lack of oxygen can explain it?

n 2017, the White House’s National Security Council Directorate for Global Health Security and Biodefense survived the transition intact. Its mission was the same as when the Obama administration established it after the Ebola epidemic of 2014: to do everything possible within the vast powers and resources of the U.S. government to prepare for the next disease outbreak and prevent it from becoming an epidemic or pandemic.One year later, the White House dissolved the office, leaving the country less prepared for pandemics like covid-19.The U.S. government’s slow and inadequate response to the new coronavirus underscores the need for organized, accountable leadership to prepare for and respond to pandemic threats.In a health security crisis, speed is essential. When this new coronavirus emerged, there was no clear White House-led structure to oversee our response, and we lost valuable time. Health systems are struggling to test patients and keep pace with growing caseloads. The specter of rapid community transmission and exponential growth is real and daunting. The job of a White House pandemics office would have been to get ahead: to accelerate the response, empower experts, anticipate failures, and act quickly and transparently to solve problems. It’s impossible to assess the full impact of the 2018 decision to disband the White House office responsible for this work, but it is clear that eliminating the office has contributed to the federal government’s sluggish domestic response. What’s especially concerning about the absence of this office today is that it was originally set up because a previous epidemic made the need for it quite clear.When asked about the slow roll-out of coronavirus tests in the U.S. on March 13, President Trump responded, “I don’t take responsibility at all.” Trump is not just responsible for it. He owns it The Trump Plague is not just his responsibility. It’s his fault.

[off-topic (and plenty bad!) song parody based on Li’l Donnie wanting to open up his OWN hotels around Easter—of course, he couldn’t care less about other hotels……..]

Here comes Donnie Fulla Wrath

Hopping down the virus path:

“Lie lie lie” (he says while jump jump Jump!)

He brings disease to girls and boys

Baskets full of poisoned toys

“Lie lie lie” (the same ol’ Donnie Trump!)

We need a bailout FROM the investors

The Creature from the Red Lagoon