Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for March 15, 2020

I think it strange the first to GO was TP! They totally WIPED out the stores! This just “cracks” me up! Praying everything “comes out” ok!

I think people would settle for sandpaper right now if it was labeled as toilet paper. The only thing people have no more of is their marbles. They have totally lost their marbles!

One of the first things to run out in a national pandemic is toilet paper. Look at Venezuela. The lesson people learned from Venezuela, is that you have to hoard toilet paper.

I had to go to the grocery store Friday night. On the way in, I saw a man leaving with a shopping cart loaded with toilet paper. Nothing but toilet paper. Okay, what can anyone do with that much? Even if you expect massive diarrhea from a COVID-19, could anyone survive having that much diarrhea? Shouldn’t you match that with Gatorade, or something else to keep you hydrated?

The store was out of TP and Kleenex by the time I reached that aisle. They were also out of bread, hand sanitizer and assorted cleansing wipes (but not basic soap bars), large bags of rice and distilled water, and canned soup. The vegetarian section was untouched, so I didn’t have any problems shopping. In fact I went back before dawn Saturday morning and snagged some vegetarian meat-substitutes. They were on sale.

One bright spot: the store has always kept hand-sanitizing wipes by the doors. They were empty on Friday night. Now we know what it takes to get Americans to wash our hands.

It’s the large purchases of bottled water that confuse me. Do these people live without running water?

Those wrestlers are not showing the appropriate amount of social distancing.

Whatever it takes to get down the road and cover your as$ at the same time. Pin it to the fridge..

I could point out the wrong spelling for the contraction, but I won’t be so picky here cuz this is Froglandia after all and very little makes any sense. . . Question though- – is Froglandia located in DC ?

… initially, this reminds me of Jacob wrestling with God…

…old wrestling poem: …

… if a wrestler drank a quart of buttermilk before he started …

…how long could he wrestle before he farted?…

…if the wrestler was to use his wit…

…he could grapple 3 periods before he sh*t…

…thus grappling = toilet paper…

…Froglandia wins again…

My local store was sold out of potatoes & onions!

Ain’t it supposed to be aren’t … not are’nt …? Sorry, just trying to distract myself from all the possible TP alternatives … ai’nt it all grand ..?

The daily newspaper may be quite helpful whenever the toilet paper stockpile depletes..

I’ve got plenty of T.P., if you’re out DM me. $100 a roll. Sanitized silver or gold only. Put it in the basket and I’ll toss a roll down.

Obviously, few, if any, survivors of the Spanish Flu 1918-19 are still around, but.. is that the last time something even close to that magnitude hit the globe? Other than the Black Plague, of course. I’m not worried about COVID-19. I’m worried about the right now and the aftermath of this pandemic. People’s panic is what is most troubling.

Besides the panic buying the stores aided it by letting a few people clean them out.

Since only outlaws shake hands now, I have been employing the deep bow. Consequently, I now have the abs of Thor.

… why haven’t stores started a one package of T.P. per customer policy?…

The oldie-time Wrestling Bozos are forced to speak to a contemporary issue, toilet tissue. They can’t help it if they are less than totally convincing. They were just written that way….