FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for April 02, 2020

the drink sounds more like an horchata to me

“Just like how raising this finger is ‘virtually’ a thumb’s up”.

I hope that bun is gluten free, that eggplant is organic and that brown rice paste has a new and improved flavor.

“It’s got raisins in it. You like raisins.” #EqualFail

I would call this an April fools joke, but it is the 2nd of April.

My wife cooks healthy food for me, but somehow she manages to make it taste good.

I think that I might have just thrown up in my mouth a little bit.

Eggplant french fries? Sounds intriguing.

I know comfort food. Comfort food is a friend of mine. This is not comfort food.

Oh ugh.

It’s a safe bet that Carly Simon did not have “Anticipation” for Beetsup

Some of the fake burgers aren’t bad, but they aren’t tofu based. Blech.

I kept hoping that someone would scream that it’s an April Fool’s joke. There’s no virus. Go on as you were. But it didn’t happen.

Everything she just presented to Peter sounds…absolutely… disgusting.

Mom must be your favorite, your kids not strong enough not the right food.

On the bright side, at least he HAD school.

“What better way to cheer you up than to serve you favorite meal?” Andy really is an idiot. My parents knew what foods their children would and wouldn’t eat. They wouldn’t spend good money on food we wouldn’t eat.

Worst mother in the world.

Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful.

That isn’t his favorite meal so much as it is a mockery of his favorite meal, I don’t know if she’s intentionally insulting him or is just so stupid/narcissistic that she genuinely thought he’d like that. I bet she would go straight through the roof if her husband were to give her an imitation of her favorite designer purse or makeup.

Beetsup would be interesting. But why would ketchup be bad? It is made with a vegetable (or fruit if you want to get technical).

I eat a lot of “health” food, and can always find things that taste good to me. This meal sounds awful.

Urp! Puke!

I don’t mean to be unkind, but how long ago did this gag stop being funny?

Since “Cat”-sup isn’t made of cats, what is “beet”-sup made from?

And some people can’t figure out why the kids were so excited about having grandma’s cooking.

I was struggling to think “ maybe, ok” on the burger and fries..though they both sound scary; that crap in the glass makes me want to vomit.

Andy is either being very cruel or totally clueless. Not sure which is worse.

WhattaMom!!

I watch a lot of crime shows. This here is what’s known as, “Justifiable homicide.”