Baby Blues by Rick Kirkman and Jerry Scott for May 22, 2023

Good call Wanda. Zoe is annoying enough she doesn’t need weapons.

How is it that right now is the first time I realized what Zoe’s preferred job category will surely be?

She can’t do any harm if you give her a whistle.

I’ve been a lifeguard. A whistle is required. Sorry, no taser allowed.

is she even old enough?

A whip would be nice…

Instead of rescuing drowning swimmers, she’d be reprimanding them for letting themselves get into danger.

Zoe with a Taser? Shudder!

A taser near a pool? Seems like even more of a bad idea than a taser alone!

If Zoe acts as the lifeguard for “our/their”pool, that means she can’t swim and Hammie can fart all he wants.

Put Zoe to work blowing up the pool. She is full of wind.

No…, And not on your life!

Let her have the taser. That way she can have a lesson in how water conducts electricity. It would be educational.

Wanda, this is a perfect time to explain to Zoe what all she will have to do, including growing older, to become a certified life guard.

I was a life guard in my teens, but back then you had to be a proficient swimmer, take and pass both Jr. and Sr. Life Guard training classes to guard at a pool. Now there is so much more to the process, with extensive First Aid training, CPR/AED training. Many kids today just don’t want to go through all the training for what is still a relatively low paying job. In this area it is $10.00 an hour.

It’s one of the reasons that in this area, public pools are closing and being replaced by Splash Pads. We used to have 30 public pools in our city, now we have 3. The city struggles every year to find enough certified lifeguards to keep the pools open.

This might not go swimmingly.

No tasers for you, dear, you’d have too much fun using them.

Zoe needs to work on her water stamina.

Kids with whistles…See Roughing It where Mark Twain describes an exchange between Brigham Young and a salesman.

Tasers incapacitate, Cattle Prods on the other hand only agitate. A good chain gang boss should know better.

As far as I can remember, this is the first strip in which they have a pool on their property.

My brother is also a lifeguard.

The taser was a bridge too far, kiddo.

That’s a scary image.

…killjoy

TEST OF A LIFEGUARD——when somebody says “Let’s make bubbles”

Back when I managed pools, I wanted to give my Lifeguards tasers. Very useful tools. The kids would be incentivized to police each other. Even more importantly, though, when it’s time to close the pool you just give them a count down.

My other idea was paintball guns…

Throws the the taser in the pool.

Haha! XD