Brevity by Dan Thompson for January 19, 2021

“Ah, mand!”

Is milk of magnesia next?

Almond milk is just nuts!

Kale milk.

Is it really “milk” if it doesn’t come from a mammary gland? Sounds like Marketing got involved.

I’ll stick to good old milk milk, thanks.

I love my lactose-free milk!

When I see l teeny-weensy people sitting on little teeny-weensy stools, squeezing it from little teeny-weensy almond udders…or oat or soybean udders…

that’s when I’ll believe that stuff is “milk.”

Or maybe when the little almond calves gather round the almond cows and suckle…. and it helps them grow into big almonds.

Just get OAT!!

A couple of years back I was running the dairy department at work, and we had a meeting of all the dairy managers in the district

They told us then to look for huge growth in milk alternatives and they were right

Oat milk was very new at the time, it didn’t really take off in our store until about the time covid hit

For a few weeks, it was one of the few things I had in stock

Thought they were going to prohibit the use of the word MILK for these sickening concoctions.

Still waiting to see barley “milk” in my local stores. It contains complete protein, along with fiber, calcium, and good fats, and it has 50% less sugar than other flavored plant-based milks.

Is it just me or did soy milk seem to fall out of favor; like overnight?

I think I would’ve put Soy into that middle position.

(Even so, my own jam is Coconut.)