Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for November 19, 2019

The bit of reversed newspaper text is from a story titled “The Female Blondin” (about a woman tight-rope performer) in The Illustrated London News in 1861. The book “How To Keep Your Husband Happy” is by William Orr in 1958. Here’s an excerpt:

https://www.mensuck.com/how-to-keep-your-husband-happy/

Back in the day, women were subservient, but BABY! LOOK AT US NOW!

How To Keep Your Spaghetti-O’s soggy was sold out.

Johann Sebastian Bach, new spokesperson for Chef Boyardee™.

Last time I tried to say it with 28% copper, my fillings hurt for a week.

I’m sure there is one titled “How to Keep Your WIFE Happy”. There has to be.

Diggin that wiggin…

Momma’s highchair…

Keeps the carpet shape, fair and square…

Suck the pasta down for coppers are gonna bust you in a snapshot…

Call the carpet cleaners, Daddy’s waggin his spork and wills away his laptop…

Pasta Down For Coppers would be a good title for a NYT best-seller about mental health options for cartoonisters and Their readers.

I remember when Wilma sang;

Make your hobby, hubby

Keep your hubby happy

When he’s a little chubby

He’s the happy pappy

With Rockenschpeel

Where’s the Skipper? I hope he is OK. Oh, no! Maybe he went on a 3hourtour again!!!

But … but … there’s always “Happy wife, happy life” …!

I’ve said it with flowers, candy, and even pottery… but I’ve never said it with copper. Maybe that’s my problem with women. (I don’t know ANY women who would follow those “Christian” guidelines. It sounds great and all, but ultimately, I’m not sure I’d expect any woman to give up who she is for my comfort and convenience.) With such an enlightened attitude, you’d think the chicks would be knocking down my door, instead of knocking it down to get away from me. Go figure. Sorry to vent here. Feeling down in the relationship department. Need a good woman. I wonder if it’s because my skin is blue. Any tips? Where can I meet a good woman in Froglandia? (The bath mat factory is mostly filled with women wearing hairnets, not fishnets, and who wear big granny panties)

Best explanation ever.

I like the yellow duckling. Reminds me of a story my big sister used to read to about a little duck named Ping. I’m not sure but I think it was one of those racist titles stereotypical of Asians, kind of like Little Black Sambo.

Afloat in a bowl of cheap canned spaghetti, hubby is kept happy and snappy (in accordance with good Christian Guidance) with an amazing 28% copper input!

—His trousers must be a bit soggy by now (if he has them on)….

I’m not sure this is a win-win circumstance. How snappy is soggy?