Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for September 24, 2023

A bit premature perhaps

A little too cocky, perhaps

So, turn sideways.

Peacocktease

From Not Always Right :

(I am sitting by myself on a bench in the local mall, waiting for my husband who has run to the bathroom. I happen to have long hair with streaks of teal in it. I’m replying to some work emails on my phone, not looking around at anyone, when a guy comes up to me.)

Guy: “I just had to tell you…”

Me: confused, startled look

Guy: in what is probably an overly passionate tone for an eight-dollar box-dye job “Your hair looks like a cascade of peacock feathers trailing down your shoulders.”

Me: really taken aback by his earnestness, but honestly appreciating the compliment “Oh. Um. Thanks!”

Guy: “So, I was thinking—“

(At that point, my husband walks up to me.)

Husband: “Okay, honey. Where are we getting lunch?”

(The guy looks at my husband, who is only just noticing him and gives him a polite, inquisitive smile. Then, the guy gives me a positively acidic look.)

Guy: “Okay, TEASE!” turns and storms off

(It was confusing, but mostly funny. Sorry my teasing, come-hither cascade of peacock hair lead you on or whatever, my dude. Hope you chill out some and grow up.)

Next time, first enter the room, then take the viagra.

Pride goeth before a fall.

Darn extensions.

Apparently she didn’t need the display. She’s already there and waiting.

maybe if he turns sideways and limbos….

So, is he a shower or a grower?

Another website for eating up my time LOL

She’s a Pea hen not a deer, dear me.

P-cocks are all over S. Florida. These birds are:

1) Nasty

2) Crap all over everything.

3) Sit on your roof and squawk so it sounds like someone is getting killed.

4) If they see their reflection in your car, they will peck at the car until it is destroyed.

5) Terrorize your pets so that they can eat their food.

6) lots of other unpleasant things.

Some people here love them, and some hate them. They are a protected species and cannot be killed. Then can be relocated, however.

Pros: They eat iguanas.

All I get around here is wild turkeys who flash their tailfeathers at me if I get too close. That includes my car. I am sure tailfeathers from a turkey would protect it from a full-sized car in motion. I patiently wait for the male, the females, and all the little babies, and if I am lucky, I can sneak in a picture of the slow-moving family.

Did you hear something go “Schwingggg!?”

so size does matter!

Maybe if you shed those feathers, it would help.

Put your tail down and back away. Then run!