Frank and Ernest by Thaves for March 16, 2024

I was lucky, they found me

Don´t die.

Own the distribution rights to “Gilligan’s Island.”

Become a Democrat voter in Ohio

and spend the rest of eternity hitting the “unsubscribe” icon….?

No such thing, everything will come to end and everything will cease to exist, but thankfully not for a very, very, very, very long time…LOL

You don’t even need to subscribe to anything. Just create an email account. The spammers will find you.

Set up automatic bill paying schedule.

I’m still receiving notices about vehicle warranties for my MIL’s car that was totaled in 2015 and she passed in 2018.

Make one online purchase from Orvis does the same thing. No, The Count is not interested in fly tying classes. Insect bondage sounds gross.

I get those that say my warranty is about to run out. My 2011 Toyota Highlander has almost 200k on it. I believe my warranty ran out just a tad ago?

Family member died. Six years later he started getting free magazines, I didn’t mind some of them but then there others that were embarrasing and immdiately went in the taste.

Our neighbor across the street donated to a lot of Christian causes and charities. One of them somehow got our address for him (one digit difference) and sent solicitations. We’d stick those in his mailbox. Then he died and we kept getting them. We’d mark “return to sender – addressee deceased” but they kept coming. Finally I took the time to sit down and write a letter explaining that Gene was a good Christian man but passed away and would not be donating anymore. I said they should save the cost of the stationery and postage. I also pointed out that they had the wrong address and the right address was currently under construction with no one living there. I sent it off and never heard from them again.

I am immortal! I will bet my life on it!

Sounds like a revised version of Spamalot.

get on your high school’s alumni list if you want to receive lots of solicitous (☺) mail…

God put me here to accomplish a certain number of things.

I’m so far behind, I’ll never die…