Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 05, 2022

If he were “New In Box”, he might be worth something. Alas.

There may be snow on the roof, but there’s still fire in the furnace!

They kept him oiled and polished, all the fluids topped up, so the corrosion is minimal, and all the gaskets are sound.

…I am just a boxer though my story’s seldom told…

…yeah, yeah, they say that about all us grandpas …

…don’t shovel the snow…

…it’ll give you a heart attack…

…why, he can still make his own tea…

…elastic knee braces…

…compression socks…

…I even know which Amtrak app to use…

…I remember coffee so strong and cheap you could stick a fork in it…

…and I’d stay there…

…Choice & Sanborn…

…pots didn’t turn off back then…

…ya brewed it ’til it was a most powerful hot syrup…

…make ya twitch your eye and shutter your teeth…

…how else ya gonna work a 12 hour day at the bathmat factory…

…ya sissies…

I’m in darn good shape … for the shape, I’m in!

Okay … did you bring a copy of your birth certificate? Other dating sites may be less careful, but here at the Bathmat Annex Livery Stable and Dating Bureau (known colloquially as the “Peek and Shriek”) we take pride in accuracy.

[Legal]:Societal standards of objectification need not apply. Customer/supplicants may experience some variance in results.

Suggestions for Sister Teresa’s Litany of Saints on the Blog:

Deadpan comedians – St. Buster Keaton

Mapmakers – Azimuthal of Amsterdam

Women on a Diet – St. Roseann Arnold, Lizzo the Inclusive

Birth Control – Amy Coney Barrett

Women’s Rights – Amy Coney Barrett

Leaders of Mutinous Subordinates – Francis of Rome

Deceptively Great Musicians – St. Frank Zappa

Don’t look a gift Horace in the mouth.

The scribbles are fading, but there they are @ @ o o ….

Unknown Saint

Saint Columbo

Still a Sears Sucker from catalog

Nobody likes a show off. Please close your trench coat, and leave that poor lady in the window alone.

The new American Marathon, The Running from the Bullets

Captain Beefheart, Old art at Play

Pappy with the Khaki sweatband bowed goat potbellied barnyard that only he noticed

The old art was smart

The old gold cloth madonna

Dancin’ t’ the fiddle ’n saw, he ran down behind the knoll

And slipped on his wooden fishhead

The mouth worked ’n snapped all the bees back to the bungalow

Momma was flattenin’ lard with her red enamel rollin’ pin

When the fishhead broke the window

Rubber eye erect and precisely detailed

Airholes from which breath should come is now closely fit

With the chatter of the old art inside

An assortment of observations took place

Momma licked her lips like a cat

Pecked the ground like a rooster

Pivoted like a duck

Her stockings down caught dust and doughballs

She cracked her mouth glaze, caught one eyelash

Rubbed her hands on her gorgeous gingham

Her hand grasped sticky metal intricate latchwork

Open to the room, a smell of coal mixed with bologna

Rubber bands, crumpled wax-paper bonnets, fat goose legs ’n special jellies

Ignited by the warmth of the room

The old far smelled this through his important breather holes

Cleverly he dialed from within

From the outside we observed that the nose of the wooden mask

Where the holes had just been a moment ago

Was now smooth, amazingly blended, camouflaged in

With the very intricate rainbow trout replica

The old far inside was now breathin’ freely

From his perfume bottle atomizer air bulb invention

His excited eyes from within the dark interior glazed

Watered in appreciation of his thoughtful cleveration

.

the censor intervened

Doesn’t look like he’ll ever be a champion at Wordle.

Regarding the “quiet neighbors” on the Blog (#FB00429):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4k5XftdTMs

You tell me how old he is and I’ll judge for myself. As it is, getting only a rear view of his black hat, black coat, and black pants, I cannot begin to guess “how he looks for his age”. He does strike a pose, though. Theatrical experience, or does he just do cartoon appearances these days?…

“his”?

On Ripley’s they are talking about giant beavers and bananas, but it has little appeal.

I’d say the condition of this comic is poor at this point. Still, it’s much better than can be said for some, and their cluelessness.

Moth Balls for clothes that make a man ♂️.

I just saw said the Blind Man, as he headed for a sea.