Close to Home by John McPherson for May 19, 2022

That’s batty even by tik tok standards

…she’s a man eater…

Al is about to need the plumbing after Sophie scares the s#it out of him!

I thought she was just a cougar.

The Plumber’s crack / Cleavage turned her on

Bleeb was well positioned but ultimately disappointed to learn that she was wearing slacks instead of a dress. Sorry, Bleeb. Ya can’t win ’em all.

Carnivore is one thing. Cannibal is (usually) another.

Quick!! Tell her you’re full of gluten!!

He´s a plumber so he´s probably been leading her on.

she’s a man eater! :\

I’d tranq her right outta that tree. Do you have any idea how rare and precious plumbers are?

In its natural habitat, the tree-dwelling housewife usually exists on kale and small salads… but as conditions change, it will scavenge for donuts or cheese, and in a need for a more nutritious sustenance, it will attack passers-by from the trees, tearing….

What? But it’s just a cartoon!… Oh alright!

I’ve just been told I’m an idiot again, for making jokes and about making women sound like wild predatory animals, and that I have to apologize again and get off the computer. Sorry!

Dang! I gotta quit doing this at the kitchen table!

Yeah, when he bends over he shows a crack!

nasty crack

Grrrr Baby; Double Grrrr!

They did tell the plumber that it had something to do with a trap. :)

Pipe down!

“Oh-oh here she comes, watch out boy she’ll chew you up, Oh-oh here she comes, she’s a man eater.”

She’s on a carnivore diet in which she eats only carnivores.

She shouldn’t be doing crack.

BTW, that was a rather casual observance.

Wait ’til you see her after that first martini!

Step back, Al, and quickly! Watch Sophie splatter all over the path.

Santa Clarita Diet

Fend her off with a plunger. One good “whomp” to the face with a wet plunger and she’ll lose her appetite.

Can carnivores eat vegans? Or are they considered vegetables?