Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for March 06, 2021

  1. Duck1275
    Brass Orchid Premium Member about 3 years ago

    Not too long ago, it was not necessary for the Froglandia Bath Mat Company to hire security guards to protect workers and executive staff alike from dissatisfied customers seeking violent personal retribution.

    What wobbles the mind is that there is no reason for customer dissatisfaction, given that any defective products would be cheerfully replaced or a refund given if the customer would only contact the Froglandia Bath Mat Company, rather than spending endless hours in the voice mail mazes of the Frugladia Bon Mot Company.

     •  Reply
  2. Duck1275
    Brass Orchid Premium Member about 3 years ago

    Your horse has missed you.

     •  Reply
  3. Josette   13 march 2016   c
    Bill Thompson  about 3 years ago

    My nephew’s wife’s grandmother has an easy work-around for these automated, button-pushing phone systems. When the robovoice says “Por Español, oprima nueva,” she pushes nine and immediately gets a human being on the line. The conversation then proceeds in her native Spanish. (I said it was easy for her, not the rest of us.)

     •  Reply
  4. Photo 1501706362039 c06b2d715385
    Zebrastripes  about 3 years ago

    ¿Habla Inglés señorita?Be thankful it’s not "Earnestine from the telephone company!

    (((((((((Snort snort! )))))))

     •  Reply
  5. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  about 3 years ago

    Don’t get me started.

    My favorite part is the tiny skull with the font top hat. Is that a stalkless dandelion, or maybe a sycamore tree pod? Shame on that sextant. It’s quite rude to peak up a lady’s dress; I don’t care if she is a wasp. The ship is clearly stuck in crossword traffic, and doesn’t even see the arrow pointing the other way. Doily is a fun word to say and reminds me of granny. Turtle out…

     •  Reply
  6. Thinker
    Sisyphos  about 3 years ago

    So, what are we saying here? That the young lady is justified in whacking some Company Dude for inflicting severe Mental Anguish on her, on top of her original dissatisfaction?

    Maybe this is why U.S.A. telephonic help desks tend to be located in India….

     •  Reply
  7. Oldwolfcookoff
    The Old Wolf  about 3 years ago

    This is 100% accurate.

     •  Reply
  8. Oldwolfcookoff
    The Old Wolf  about 3 years ago

    What’s interesting is that the source of this text, an article in the Boston Globe, is now 20 years old, and things have only gotten worse.

     •  Reply
  9. 7831c9a4 3d01 43f0 af20 333f72f4f2c7
    Howard'sMyHero  about 3 years ago

    http://youtu.be/lLeCB7Kn-VE

     •  Reply
  10. Orange bird 2
    drycurt  about 3 years ago

    “…please listen closely because our menu items have changed…”

     •  Reply
  11. Colt2
    coltish1  about 3 years ago

    [SIGH] “Main menu!”

     •  Reply
  12. Skipper
    3hourtour Premium Member about 3 years ago

    …those are not the ‘Legs’ that I remember…

    …someone is spending too much time complaining on Facebook…

    …a sextant and an a hornet walk into a bar…

    ….is that the virus…

    …or are you just glad to see me?…

    …Don’t worry, it’s only Lila on the other side of the phone…

    …I’ll have to put you on hold for a while…

     •  Reply
  13. Skipper
    3hourtour Premium Member about 3 years ago

    … https://youtu.be/kjgvBnYN_Lo. …

     •  Reply
  14. Colt2
    coltish1  about 3 years ago

    I usually say some variant of, So you want that knucklehead (where I’d cite some knucklehead who we both know) to decide your issues for you. Good plan.

     •  Reply
  15. Td  2
    Rotifer NOT GETTING RUBEN BOLLING’S PIN Thalweg Premium Member about 3 years ago

     

    Re: Request For Comments – Non Voting

    Teresa – this really depends on the context of the question.

       1.   If the context is an American electoral contest you remind them of Benjamin Franklin’s quote, “A republic if you can keep it,” patiently explain the meaning and importance blah blah blah.

       2.   If the context is whether to vote to unionize the Frog Applause Owned Bath Mat Factory you bring in goons to bust a few kneecaps then non voting is no problem.

     •  Reply
  16. Oldwolfcookoff
    The Old Wolf  about 3 years ago

    There’s always a relevant Dilbert: https://dilbert.com/strip/1997-09-07

     •  Reply
  17. Skipper
    3hourtour Premium Member about 3 years ago

    …now, this would make a great jigsaw puzzle…

    …this is really a Froglandia incantation…

    …once you read it…

    …you become a citizen…

    …the only side effect is if you are from NYC…

    …you’ll want your knickerbock…

    …but no refunds are allowed…

    ..and you don’t have to be so cavalier about it…

    …because the ball is in your court…

    …and our service is like a fish swimming in the ocean…

    ..with nothing but net… from Ted Nugent book…

    …Fingering Yourself In The Digital Age…

     •  Reply
  18. Screenshot 20220517 145611
    Mad-ge Dish Soap  about 3 years ago

    Thank you… To women on their International Day to be Reckoned With. I myself am going thru Lymphedema care and this month honors such things. The day for recognizing was Last Friday and my Therapists took the day off. Go Figure 8) .

     •  Reply
  19. Bren suit
    FLIGHT SUIT  about 3 years ago

    I have never murdered a company.

     •  Reply
  20. Screenshot 20220517 145611
    Mad-ge Dish Soap  about 3 years ago

    Another Pink Brick in Floyd’s white or black wall tires.

     •  Reply
  21. Screenshot 20220517 145611
    Mad-ge Dish Soap  about 3 years ago

    Used to be The Dog Pound…

    Now press pound for or wait for an operator.

     •  Reply
  22. Agent gates
    Radish the wordsmith  about 3 years ago

    The complaint tablet to Ea-nasir (UET V 81)1 is a clay tablet from ancient Babylon written c. 1750 BC. It is a complaint to a merchant named Ea-nasir from a customer named Nanni. Written in Akkadian cuneiform, it is considered to be the oldest known written complaint. It is currently kept in the British Museum.

    Ea-nasir travelled to the Persian Gulf to buy copper and returned to sell it in Mesopotamia. On one particular occasion, he had agreed to sell copper ingots to Nanni. Nanni sent his servant with the money to complete the transaction. The copper was sub-standard and not accepted. In response, Nanni created the cuneiform letter for delivery to Ea-nasir. Inscribed on it is a complaint to Ea-nasir about a copper delivery of the incorrect grade, and issues with another delivery; Nanni also complained that his servant (who handled the transaction) had been treated rudely. He stated that, at the time of writing, he had not accepted the copper, but had paid the money for it.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complaint_tablet_to_Ea-nasir

     •  Reply
  23. Thinker
    Sisyphos  about 3 years ago

    Another day: Oh, dearie me! The justifiable homicides continue!

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Frog Applause