Tom Toles for March 08, 2019

Trump is pivoting to security issues. HIS OWN security. He doesn’t give a damn about anyone else, especially not those who are loyal to him in a one-way track.

And as Trump contemplates what it will take to keep HIMSELF safe, and maybe his family — Ivanka for sure, Jared if Ivanka begs and cries, possibly Donnie Jr and Eric, Melania, Barron and Tiffany are anyone’s guess — he has to think who he can really count on.

PUTIN! Trump can escape to Russia and request asylum!

Of course, Putin is like Trump in the sense that loyalty flows only one way. But Putin is also smart. A presidential surrender would be the ultimate public relations coup. And he would want to send a message to others — surrender to the great Vladimir and you will be richly rewarded.

Putin is probably the richest person on earth (all stolen, of course). He can afford to set Trump (and his designated guests) in a dacha, compound or small village, overlooking scenic (except in winter) vistas, with all the caviar, Adderall, Big Mac’s and pee-pee generous Russian hookers Trump desires.

The only question? Will Russia return Air Force One?

I thought that Trump uses the Flag instead of Depends.

He’s in luck. Prisons are usually quite ‘security focused’.

I’m pretty sure Linus would love that blanket. Trump is immature enough for one, but they don’t really help people with suspected lobotomies.

He should save a corner of his ‘security blanket’ for the rest of his administration.

Trump’s soiling the flag! That’s only one level below burning it. Where do we put this on the list of his many other infractions?

The Republican party that has unconditional loyalty to the resident is very different than the Republican party of just 2 years ago and vastly different than the Eisenhower Republican party that I was raised in. The unconditional loyalty concept seems to be spreading to the Democratic party as well … as the differences between the progressives and the Reagan-Republican-Lite factions grow. America’s needs now very clearly take second place to partisanship and the ‘D’/‘R’ after a politician’s name is all that politically active seem to care about. With all the wealth being diverted upwards to individuals and mega-corporations and oligopolies, there is little chance that free enterprise capitalism will survive. As America’s standard of living and unity continue their descent, neither party seems to offer a way to reverse the downward trend, and vague empty — fill in the blanks — slogans like “Yes, we can” or Make America Great Again" from presidents trying to rule by executive order because Congress’s partisanship has made it almost completely dysfunctional are not the solution. America, not a political party must become the priority if we are to prosper not just survive on a faulty life support system poorly run by a self-centered opposing party system unwilling the make the compromises that vital organizations do every day.

Speaking of policy failures, I’m curious how come the economy hasn’t tanked after all the trade wars and tariffs.

If you’ve been following Agent Orange’s twitter rants, he DOES seem to be regressing further and further back to infancy as his mind deteriorates from his Adderall and Cocaine addictions and his untreated Syphilis…

With apologies to Charles Shultz.

More like INsecurity issues….

Kim restarting nuclear tipped missile preparedness, Putin launching latest, laser shooting jet planes, Cohen testifying under oath. Trump is just hiding till the men in white coats come to get him.

I understand that after Trump finished, the flag at the CPAC Conference was found in a shower stall, crying.

Was it Samuel Johnson who said “patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel”? Flag hugging Trump must be the scoundrel Johnson envisioned.

Jail the Trump crime family.

Only 22,000 jobs created last month what a joke.

The ‘stable genius’ is running the country into the ground.

Jared is in Saudi Arabia negotiating with MBS for a safe haven for the trump crime family to run to when the indictments drop, and Federal Marshals show up with the arrest warrants…

Time to give him the ol’ Linus-item veto…?

I was not sipping coffee when this one appeared so the keyboard stayed dry.

I had forgotten about Toles — I used to see his stuff in a magazine I read. I thought he could be original… but I see he’s just bopping on Trump like every other conforming lefty. Ho hum. Let’s make fun of Trump. How clever. At least Ted Rall is an equal opportunity ridiculer.

And ANOTHER “Administration Official” has abandoned the Lusitrumpia… Bill Shine, sexual harasser, late of FAUX Noise, married to a real NUTCASE Anti-Vaxxer.

It would be worth losing AF One to get rid of Trump. And Mommadillo has a good point. It would be easier to fit up a new jet than strip the spy equipment out of the old one.

Agent Orange just condemned a House Resolution “Condemning Hate Speech”, calling it a DISGRACE!!!

So, we now have PROOF THAT HE SUPPORTS HATE SPEECH!!

Strange. One would think he would use the flag as toilet paper, rather than a security blanket, based on how he’s treated what it represents.

Donald Van Trump

I know Li’l Donnie is NOT intelligent, never was and never will be, but dontcha think somebody or other of somewhat or other worth, who has the misfortune to know Li’l Donnie, MIGHT could point out that his bleep DOES stink?