Pickles by Brian Crane for September 23, 2018

Considering that Betty White is in her 90s, I’m not sure it’s a compliment.

Opal, you haven’t been as bawdy as Betty White one day in your life.

Nor were you married to Allen Ludden.

“Argue with me!”…are you sure that’s a challenge you want to accept, Earl?

Earl is probably thinking, “What did I do? I’m just sittin’ here reading the paper and…..”

When someone watches a 50 year old movie, they imagine the movie stars as looking like they looked in that movie. I don’t know which Betty White image Earl has in his head.

As opposed to Betty White, You know, the cab driver.

Call the cops Earl! That hag just assaulted you!!

I go out to the kitchen to feed the dog, but that’s about as much cooking as I do. Betty White

I like double entendre because then the people who get it enjoy it, and the people who don’t get it don’t know about it. Betty White

I have the backbone of an eel. Betty White

Animal lover that I am, a cougar I am not. Betty White

I may be a senior, but so what? I’m still hot. Betty White

Earl tell Opal you have to go to the bathroom……you know to think it over :-)

Pull a Shultz, Earl. “I know nothing!”

Knowing WHEN to argue with the spousal unit is the secret to a happy marriage. Never could get that quite right.

Just say the universal answer…….. Yes dear.

If a man tells the truth in the forest, does his wife tell him he’s wrong?

Celebrities I’ve been told I look like: Ricky Skaggs, Elwood Blues, John Popper, Conway Twitty, Walter Slezak. For most of those, I’m pretty sure they’re talking about what they looked like at a particular point in the past.

Finally. Instructions

Time to fake a heart attack and ride off in the ambulance to relative safety.

At least she didn’t say Bea Arthur.

Earl is doomed if he agrees, doomed if he disagrees.

She reminds me of Vicky Lawrence as Mama

Betty was soo hot in Mary Tyler Moore!