I was going to ask why they’d be reading newspapers in Heaven, but then remembered how many newspapers have died in the past decade or two. (I won’t make the obvious crack about who might populate a world of coffee and donuts.)
Being Gluten Free…its been a long time since I’ve had a donut. A French cruller with strawberry frosting please. From Dolly O doughnuts Huntington Beach CA circa 1965.
But they all seem to fit the late middle age and coffee klatch config. Guess there must be another ‘room’ for different categories. Maybe a Starbucks or Dunkin with pc outlets and cells working?
Just wondering what would be in those papers because for the past 60 years, reading the newspaper has always included a slight increase in blood pressure. Would we still be reading about war, poverty, crime, and injustice? And would the sports section still have the Cubs in the cellar?
I like this version of Heaven. There needs to be something else, though. You can still have your favorite morning beverage and a newspaper, but you also get a cat on your lap (or a dog by your feet, or whatever gives you comfort, be it animal, mineral, vegetable, etc.).
I notice that people are reading what appear to be paper tablets of some sort. Also there is nary a cable TV nor smartphone in sight. Now that’s my idea of heaven.
I think one needs an actual body to have sensorial inputs. Disembodied souls are more like armchair philosophers: all a priori. Setting aside the fact that mind is a product of brain, thus…
I may spend a few extra days in purgatory for this, but really. I’d rather be in the Dunkin Donuts heaven that the endless Mormon Tabernacle Choir heaven. …just sayin’
Coffee sales in the colonies increased when our founding fathers rebelled against the British tea industry. Today, tea (black or green) is worldwide the most commonly consumed beverage after water. I trust heaven is much more diverse and universal than this snapshot, esp since I’m a tea person.
Like manna, the edibles and drinkables will taste like whatever you want them to taste like. Want pizza? That doughnut will transform into your favorite (even ham and pineapple!) as it enters your mouth. The coffee will become tea, or beer, or whiskey at your whim.
I don’t have a sweet tooth, so donuts don’t interest me. I have been know to take a bite of a Long John with chocolate frosting, unfilled… but just one bite. Any more than that becomes cloying.
New Heaven and New Earth are listed along with the colossal structure called New Jerusalem which nobody bothers to depict just clouds. [The New Earth will have to be as large as Jupiter or Neptune to take the 100 billion dead and New Jerusalem.]
On the other hand nothing close to a 100 billion will qualify since Heaven is a very strictly regulated membership. Hel is for everyone else under the Goddess Hel.
The 2005 book A History of the World in 6 Glasses, by Tom Standage, presents a vision of world history, telling the story of humanity from the Stone Age to the 21st Century through the lens of beer, wine, spirits, coffee, tea, and cola.
Years ago I bought a brand new powerful Cobra radar detector. (Traveling salesman at the time.) Going through Alexandria it started screaming like a banshee. To my right I saw a gaggle (Sic) of police cars, all grouped around a coffee and doughnut place. Naturally, I had to pull over. It had great coffee and doughnuts, and the cops were telling me all kinds of unbelievable stories. I had a great time, and made it a regular stop on my route.
First Daughter opines that everyone will have the heaven he or she (oh all right, or they) believes in. I said fine, as long as we all have visiting rights.
How about that poor person behind the counter, forced to work and smile so the others can feel good about doing nothing but still getting something for it.
willispate 8 months ago
she has a point there.
GreasyOldTam 8 months ago
One of the remarkably tiny number of versions of heaven that looks like it would be worth the bother to get into.
HidariMak 8 months ago
I was going to ask why they’d be reading newspapers in Heaven, but then remembered how many newspapers have died in the past decade or two. (I won’t make the obvious crack about who might populate a world of coffee and donuts.)
AllishaDawn 8 months ago
That would be my hell. I can not stand the smell of coffee. It makes me nauseous.
SameAsOldFfred 8 months ago
I still prefer Wiley’s vision of beer and pizza in Eden.
Alexander the Good Enough 8 months ago
That DOES look like it could be heaven. Drink all the coffee and eat all of the donuts one wants guilt-free? Sign me up!
keenanthelibrarian 8 months ago
Looks like paradise to me ..
Jml58 8 months ago
There is free Wifi and donuts.
Last Rose Of Summer Premium Member 8 months ago
Being Gluten Free…its been a long time since I’ve had a donut. A French cruller with strawberry frosting please. From Dolly O doughnuts Huntington Beach CA circa 1965.
Scorpio Premium Member 8 months ago
I have my own idea’s about Heaven… but coffee and bagels would definitely be part of it.
wallylm 8 months ago
(To rephrase an old Nike commercial) Life of a coffee shop addict: Coffee, sleep. Coffee, sleep. Coffee, sleep. Go to heaven…..
Coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, COFFEE!!!
SHIVA 8 months ago
Well, a nice danish, or scones would be nice, too!!!
sandpiper 8 months ago
But they all seem to fit the late middle age and coffee klatch config. Guess there must be another ‘room’ for different categories. Maybe a Starbucks or Dunkin with pc outlets and cells working?
fuzzbucket Premium Member 8 months ago
Sure beats listening to a harp symphony. In this version, I want peach cobbler and milk.
crosscompiler Premium Member 8 months ago
Meanwhile, south of the Mason-Dixon line …
cdward 8 months ago
Just wondering what would be in those papers because for the past 60 years, reading the newspaper has always included a slight increase in blood pressure. Would we still be reading about war, poverty, crime, and injustice? And would the sports section still have the Cubs in the cellar?
PraiseofFolly 8 months ago
Are there Pumpkin Spice donuts EVEN THERE??!
LawrenceS 8 months ago
If it’s heaven I want a good book in my hand rather than a newspaper. I’d like happy thoughts.
Dobby53 Premium Member 8 months ago
But where are the cats and dogs? Coffee and paper without them seems empty.
dot-the-I 8 months ago
Well, the Biblical Greek (First Testament and New) for immerse/dunk is “baptizo”; it is what I do with my donuts.
phritzg Premium Member 8 months ago
I like this version of Heaven. There needs to be something else, though. You can still have your favorite morning beverage and a newspaper, but you also get a cat on your lap (or a dog by your feet, or whatever gives you comfort, be it animal, mineral, vegetable, etc.).
Egrayjames 8 months ago
Imagine Heaven and that you’ve already been there.
mrwiskers 8 months ago
How would the articles be chosen for the newspapers in heaven? By holy algorithm?
-Saint- 8 months ago
Heaven for sure, unless the coffee is still $7.87 a cup…
david_42 8 months ago
St. Peter: “I don’t know about this latest batch. All they do is stand there looking down at their hands.”
Old Time Tales Premium Member 8 months ago
Enough is a feast.
Count Olaf Premium Member 8 months ago
Unlimited free refills.
dflak 8 months ago
I notice that people are reading what appear to be paper tablets of some sort. Also there is nary a cable TV nor smartphone in sight. Now that’s my idea of heaven.
gorbag 8 months ago
I think one needs an actual body to have sensorial inputs. Disembodied souls are more like armchair philosophers: all a priori. Setting aside the fact that mind is a product of brain, thus…
sleepyhead 8 months ago
Heaven is where Starbucks employees are treated decently.
preacherman Premium Member 8 months ago
So, heaven is perpetual breakfast. Not bad. Some of my best times are spent in the morn. But, I like those late night reruns, too.
ChaimG 8 months ago
The way my NY Yankees did this year and how my NY Jets are doing, I don’t want to see the scores!!
Tonto & Redd Panda 8 months ago
Hope they have the Sunday Funnies.
Geophyzz 8 months ago
I guess Tim set up shop there in 1974.
vaughnrl2003 Premium Member 8 months ago
I may spend a few extra days in purgatory for this, but really. I’d rather be in the Dunkin Donuts heaven that the endless Mormon Tabernacle Choir heaven. …just sayin’
ctb11365 8 months ago
Why do the people all have halos? In catholic iconography, halos were reserved for saints, I thought.
Roy Lamberton 8 months ago
And the donuts are non fattening – eat as many as you want, just don’t be a Glutton!
ladykat 8 months ago
I want my cats and dogs.
hollisson Premium Member 8 months ago
It can’t be heaven without pizza.
bagholder5150 8 months ago
Where are the dogs ?
txmystic 8 months ago
Access to the infinite library would be nice…
batesmom7 8 months ago
Coffee sales in the colonies increased when our founding fathers rebelled against the British tea industry. Today, tea (black or green) is worldwide the most commonly consumed beverage after water. I trust heaven is much more diverse and universal than this snapshot, esp since I’m a tea person.
poppacapsmokeblower 8 months ago
In the Episcopal Church it’s called the eighth sacrament, coffee and pastries.
MitmanArt 8 months ago
I want a forest that runs down to the crashing sea. With very few other people. Oh, and my dogs. All of my dogs.
mindjob 8 months ago
Amazon is never late for a delivery
momkastner 8 months ago
what more could I want? A cat on my lap & a dog at my feet :)
ira.crank 8 months ago
Blasphemy! Those in heaven will only be praising and worshiping God and His Son forever, and ever, and ever…
Mostly Water Premium Member 8 months ago
Booze.
PassinThru 8 months ago
I don’t know – looks like retirement to me.
Radish the wordsmith 8 months ago
I’ve had that for the last 30 years, even heaven gets boring.
Bex Premium Member 8 months ago
I like the part about not having to wear anything but pjs and robe.
gdklein 8 months ago
I still like the one from a couple years ago the best. Heaven was a water theme park.
snowedin, now known as Missy's mom 8 months ago
Beer. I’d want there to be beer.
r413j731 8 months ago
This would work for me!
Calvins Brother 8 months ago
and you have all of eternity ahead of you, no rush.
jahoody 8 months ago
are those donuts or cow pies on the path??
JohnS1 8 months ago
WINEBAR
The Brooklyn Accent 8 months ago
Like manna, the edibles and drinkables will taste like whatever you want them to taste like. Want pizza? That doughnut will transform into your favorite (even ham and pineapple!) as it enters your mouth. The coffee will become tea, or beer, or whiskey at your whim.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Mike Baldwin creator 8 months ago
HA! Yeah but, who do you sue when the coffee is too hot?
locake 8 months ago
Why are the donuts on the ground? I don’t want dirty donuts.
ChattyFran 8 months ago
I don’t see any dogs or cats. Pretty lousy heaven, if you ask me…
locake 8 months ago
I do not want to wear a robe and slippers all day. I like getting dressed into something else.
JosephShriver 8 months ago
Donuts, hot chocolate and a good book, who could ask for anything more
rugeirn 8 months ago
If there are no calories in heaven, the whole silly supernatural idea starts to become a bit more attractive.
DM2860 8 months ago
Pizza
chief tommy 8 months ago
Wiley, in my informal poll your strip gets more comments than any other
Bilan 8 months ago
Plus, in Heaven, everybody has their own private restroom.
thedogesl Premium Member 8 months ago
Looks like heaven to me.
thedogesl Premium Member 8 months ago
“If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.” — James Thurber
willie_mctell 8 months ago
Cinnamon roll for me, please.
braindead Premium Member 8 months ago
Everyone enjoying themselves? More or less equally?
Kinda socialist, doncha think?
Teresa Burritt (Frog Applause) creator 8 months ago
I don’t have a sweet tooth, so donuts don’t interest me. I have been know to take a bite of a Long John with chocolate frosting, unfilled… but just one bite. Any more than that becomes cloying.
unfair.de 8 months ago
A neverending breakfast. I guess GOD is a Hobbit.
T... 8 months ago
There some comics, that bring commenters out of the woodwork, this is one of them…
amaryllis2 Premium Member 8 months ago
It just needs knitting needles and good yarn. Preferably hand-combed qiviut from the Alaskan musk ox.
anomaly 8 months ago
Pizza?
Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo] 8 months ago
New Heaven and New Earth are listed along with the colossal structure called New Jerusalem which nobody bothers to depict just clouds. [The New Earth will have to be as large as Jupiter or Neptune to take the 100 billion dead and New Jerusalem.]
On the other hand nothing close to a 100 billion will qualify since Heaven is a very strictly regulated membership. Hel is for everyone else under the Goddess Hel.
Richard S Russell Premium Member 8 months ago
The 2005 book A History of the World in 6 Glasses, by Tom Standage, presents a vision of world history, telling the story of humanity from the Stone Age to the 21st Century through the lens of beer, wine, spirits, coffee, tea, and cola.
johnkmcdougall Premium Member 8 months ago
It is only missing dogs.
eddi-TBH 8 months ago
Eternal breakfast.
wconerly28 8 months ago
Years ago I bought a brand new powerful Cobra radar detector. (Traveling salesman at the time.) Going through Alexandria it started screaming like a banshee. To my right I saw a gaggle (Sic) of police cars, all grouped around a coffee and doughnut place. Naturally, I had to pull over. It had great coffee and doughnuts, and the cops were telling me all kinds of unbelievable stories. I had a great time, and made it a regular stop on my route.
MY DOG IS MY CO PILOT 8 months ago
Add dogs and this would be my heaven.
JH&Cats 8 months ago
Everyone can play and sing along, all the parts fit together just right and it sounds great all the time.
Beowulf 406 Premium Member 8 months ago
I used to get up early on work days just to enjoy this; my absolute favorite part of the day.
harebell 8 months ago
First Daughter opines that everyone will have the heaven he or she (oh all right, or they) believes in. I said fine, as long as we all have visiting rights.
Timothy Madigan Premium Member 8 months ago
How about that poor person behind the counter, forced to work and smile so the others can feel good about doing nothing but still getting something for it.