Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for October 29, 2023

I thought he would put on a costume and go trick-or-treating.

Used to be a day when kings led their army in battle, whatever happened to that?

The fink is in horrible rotund shape!

“We could arrange to have you carried.” – Tywin Lannister

Henry VIII was reported to have weighed around 400 pounds at the time of his death, but was actually quite fit in his early years

Look in the mirror, Fink!

It’s tough at the top……

I went to Biltmore recently, It was beautiful but I don’t know how someone could stand to live there. By the end of the day, I almost couldn’t walk anymore. And I’m a healthy 16 year old so it takes a lot to get to that point.

So … the bedroom is not right behind (or beside) the throne room?

Hasn’t had an elevator installed yet. Where’s Otis?

And he still has to climb into that bed!

“He retired early this evening”…meaning he finally decided to stop being king (fat chance) or he decided to sleep early (which I usually do on Saturdays)…

I guess the heat is better there!

All that walking just to go to bed? Ugh, sounds grueling.

Now to mountain climb over the bed

Now they hide in Washington, “direct” Desert Storm from there and grab all the credit. Stormin’ Norman deserved the credit, but the Joint Chiefs of Staff took all the credit…for doing nothing.

I suppose a king who can’t navigate his own castle is not long for the throne. Of course, a king with legs 3 inches long may get a pass.

Or any of us actually…..

If the a$$holes that start the wars had to actually fight them we’d have a lot fewer wars!

So the king draws social security now?

That’s right, Charlie. There’s no excuse for you being out of shape.

That’s 6,000 steps easy.

Not in that castle anyway…

Unless they run America.