Herman by Jim Unger for June 22, 2022

Here’s a tip. Be kind to snakes.

Buttercup Dream in the third at Belmont.

Their sticking the tip on the bill now! Makes service poor, I think.

Low expectations.

Had that experience yesterday. Totally mediocre food at elevated price. If it weren’t for the company, I would have passed. But that’s what one does when the younger family member makes the birthday meal choice. The gathering is more important than the meal.

Performance related rewards?

I would starve!!

Tip him now, then sue the restaurant if you end up in hospital. After all, he didn’t make the food.

Don’t take the toast out of the toaster with a fork. Don’t park on a railroad track. I’m generous. That’s two tips.

Buy low, sell high. (It’s all in the timing.)

I’ll have to remember that line.

That’s actually a good idea. Mail the tip.

It could have been worse. He could have eaten that last mint and exploded “cue Monty python”

And if he dies, he’ll haunt you.