Skin Horse by Shaenon K. Garrity and Jeffrey C. Wells for January 30, 2021

It’s awful hard to flip a waterbed, much less all those goldfish inside.

Sex in the waterbed was a real splash! They came in waves.

This could be the beginning of something new. With a lot of future side effects.

Hard on you, Tip..?

Like Tip need any further persuasion for sex

Thank goodness he came to his senses at the last minute.

One word that I have not heard said

In many years is “waterbed.”

Recall when those were all the rage?

(Now that’s a way to show my age.)

They may have seemed like cozy fun,

But not when you were filling one

Or carrying its heavy weight.

The harder models sure aren’t great

For back support or circulation.

Furthermore, there’s radiation:

Heaters make magnetic fields

That may cause cancer (there’s no shield).

And Edward Scissorhands displays

Another reason for the craze

Declining from its ‘80s peak:

At times you’d have to fix a leak.

While waterbeds can still be bought

Online today, I’d rather not.

Tigerlilly has got Tip on a feather boa leash. One tiny stroke of ego and he abandons his scruples and follows her like a puppy dog. Mind you, I would have done the exact same thing.