Close to Home by John McPherson for April 26, 2020

I wish they had done something like this sooner. It’s so bad now they even have had to arm Bleeb.

TP needs a new classification. How many turds per-roll can you get? Let’s get real folks, That’s what really counts.

And remember, breakthrough seriously sucks. That’s a huge part of the equation.

Weight limit is certainly not a problem.

My store already has multiple brands on the shelves.

I work for a grocery store and during the worst of the “crisis” there were crowds of people waiting when the store opened

I kept an eye on them when they came in, would not have been too surprised at one point to be help up for TP

My first 4 favorites are fine, after that they all have the AT&T ad, and will not come up!

Single rolls, how quaint.

Coming soon to a crazed populace near you!

Why all the fuss? Just rinse it out, hang it to dry, and reuse it.

My son went to the grocery store a few days ago (I am not allowed, yet) and he said there is plenty of paper products, but still no cleaning supplies. How about in your area?

What’s that one guy got, a blowgun?!

Two masks for five guards? Not very safe!

So know we all know what the apocalypse will bring? Smelly bottoms.

Isn’t everyone tired of the toilet paper jokes by now?

In the not too distant future of Brinks trucks…..

Yeah, that pretty much says it all.

This joke is a bit behind (some pun intended). I work in a grocery store and we have gotten in pallets of toilet paper and paper towels over the past week.

Now that people have hoarded TP, they can use it as currency. Also, the US Mint can use it to print new money. Then the US will truly have dual-purpose currency. For those times when you need Legal Tender, and those times when you just need something “tender” for your….

I don’t know what all the fuss is about. When Kroger had Quilted Northern TP on sale for a Friday sale, I bought the limit of 5 packages. I’m good for six months plus. When something is on sale, I always stock up.

Shouldn’t those be wrapped up and in boxes?

Wouldn’t want to get wiped out!

H I L A R E O U S .

That won’t last long.

Around here the network tells you where TP is in stock, but by the time you get there it’s gone.

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!! Bleeb is back!!!!!!!!!!! Hi Little Alien Dude! Watch where you’re pointing that thing, Bleeb! Don’t want to destroy the TP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Loved your 4/26 cartoon about the toilet paper craziness! See you on the golf course this summer. Stay well and safe! Bob S.

Careful Bleeb or you’ll get wiped out.

As long as there are corn cob rinds, we should have no problem.