B.C. by Mastroianni and Hart for September 30, 2019

“Wait until I install my lift kit! You might need an oxygen mask up there.”

So in the last panel, did the mean bird say that wisecrack on tortoise?

Open up your sunroof and watch him fall.

For a freeloader he’s got a big beak…

Should have jettisoned the useless weight on your back as you ascended that hill Mr. Tortoise …

Smooth, John. You can hardly tell the difference! ;)

Hes getting a nitrous system installed next week.

Bird isn’t wearing his seat belt

Drop it in “Granny gear”!

Low gear, high gear….is the same speed….for turtle

By federal law now the worker has to warn the freeloader before changing anything otherwise the worker is subject to fines which will be redistributed to the freeloader with a portion kept by the government.

Low gear give you more torque to get up a hill, but then of course everyone knows that torque is cheap.

He’s a cute little all wheel drive!

What? No “turtle cop” pulling them over and giving them citations for the bird not having its seat belt on and the turtle for not having “taillights?”

The tortise has got it all over me. Since I retired I have only 2 speeds, slow and dead stop. Usually the latter…

Oh, man, does this remind me of driving a 1950s stick shift woody over the Oregon Mountains to get to Seattle. And it was packed with STUFF. . .I didn’t think I’d make it. . .

Better darn well not use his Jake-brake on the downhill side.

He’s going faster today because he used Turtle Wax.

18 wheelers too often have ‘turtle races’ up a steep hill.

Wow! I wonder how many G’s they’re pulling?

His gate is definitely not of his species. It’s like he is goosestepping one side then the other. Now why would any of the bio-engineers would do this?