Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for April 02, 2013

Hi everybody.

Perhaps Leon should unhand the cat faced pillow…

Good way to loose a hand Leon. Munkyblues trained Louie to really hate cats !

Peeking in…….Whew. …. looks OK…

You there? Monkey?

I just gotta go back to the salon for a few minutes and unload some groceries. ..I’ll be right back. ..Everybody be cool!

I’m here, Bev…. I’m here….

And the Monkey’s OK…really! You know he’d never hurt you!

He’s not only our good friend, he’s kind and generous…. and he’s the Sheriff!

But monkeys… well, they play hard…they think a lot of things are funny that we humans just….well…. we don’t.

You played hardball with him…and now he thinks you want to play monkey -size jokes….you know?

C’mon…. let’s have some soup.

I don’t think the Monkey would … never mind….

Oh… and I’m really tired.If you only want a pedi, could we make it 12:16 tomorrow instead of 11:37?

Hi Brian… or good night……

Nobody needs anything profound to say here…. we’re just glad to see you, so saying hello is way better than saying nothing!

Ladies, and you too Bri, let me buy you all a nightcap. No fear about Munky, Bev. he is busy attending to the placement of all that yak dung on your front porch ! Just kidding ! ( As far as I know ). Anyway, I’m having my usual and then off to walk Zeke the Zebra, so order what tickles your fancy… Don’ t say what you’re thinking Brian !!

OH!

I only went in the back door into the kitchen…..

He did it i my salon???!I’ve been so tired I wasn’t thinking about that!

MONKEY!!!

Sigh….

Actually…. he’s pretty good about cleaning up messes…

And he knows humans have this strange obsession with clean salons and restaurants…and hospitals…and our doctors don’t put mud on everything…

So he may have done it already.Maybe.

Oh, thanks Ling….it’s been a loooong day….I was going to stick to yaktail soup and hot chocolate…but a little brandy in the latter wouldn’t go amiss…

Did you get your soup, Bev?

OK Bev…. as long as morning isn’t before 11:52.

Meanwhile… a glitter covered munky keeps a tite watch on teh goins on at teh tiki frum his perch on his fridge… “meybe ah needs ta werk on mah pokey dots..” he thinks tew himsef…. as he drifts off tew sleep… dreamin of painted glitter covered puss kats…. with fethers poofin’ out… yep, a gud daze zzzzzx…… Zzzzzzx… Snik*…..Zzzzzz. (-..-)

Do I hear snoring?

I could swear I heard snoring….. and it sounded…. I dunno….kinda like “bhwah ha hazzzzzzzzzzzz”

And I smell bananas….and …… glitter?

Uh oh…..

Impossible, Dog… he has a few hours head start.

Hi Red!

I’m pretty much keeling over, myself.

Long weekend, long drive home, several stops…then I had to worry about Bev and the Monkey!

I just had some hot chocolate with a generous splash of brandy…I think that’s gonna do it for tonight….

Louie’s not a big fan of Garfield.

Just wait until Louise sees the mess you two have created! Then there will be somebody’s feathers flying!

The only cat that Louie is really afraid of is El Gato the Watch Cat. Although El Gato stays on my galleon, The Irish Rover, most of the time, guarding the ship, he occasionally does make forays into town . Drunks,dogs and unruly cats beware ! Louie found out the hard way that this is one cat not to mess with.Speaking of messing with somebody, has anyone seen our glitter covered Sheriff ?

you win… i’ll be in the van down by the river

So much for pillow talk.

Who dressed my turkeys in wigs and dresses? Some are male you know. I will not be paying the therapy bills!!

Wait til Leona sees what happened to her needlepoint pillow that won the blue ribbon at the Ballard County Arts & Crafts Fair and Tractor Pull last October. It only took her six months of painstaking needlepointing and ripping out stitches….needlepointing and ripping out stitches…well, YOU try to needlepoint with cataracts!

( Ballard Bugle photo, October 2012 )

Leon and Louie will BOTH be in the doghouse now…………

Hellooooo Ms Bev…!!!!My dont yer nales look gud…!!! Ah seas SuSun did a GUD job…!!!!

Bev, whatever did you put in the snickerdoodles???? Munky is out like a light again and right near where I put the bowl of glitter that I just cleaned up.

I just hope he doesn’t ……………………… SNEEZE!!!

sniff… snifff*** ahhhhhh…. ahhhhhhhh….AAHHHHHHHH…

Oh NO!

My beeootiful glitter!

Oh, Monkey, I know you couldn’t help it…this time…

….sigh….But you know…the salon looks… kinda pretty…all glittery and everything…..

I don’t suppose I could…. leave it that way?

And BTW…. Gesundheit!

Bev…. I’m not sure…. and he’s a little overwrought at the moment …but I think the Monkey might think I make the stripes with special STRIPING glitter.

i.e. "striper’…. well, maybe..

When I read he wanted to use “stripper” glitter I was worried more about paint stripper than the other kind.

And really, strippers wear the same glitter as everybody else….I don’t think taking off your clothes is contagious…

Well, except with monkeys, maybe….and…um… a few parties that I ….. have heard of…on…the…. radio….or something.

Not nice to insult Dogsniff when he’s not here.

Well, Bev….I don’t ask my clients what they do for a living…except as mere conversation.

And if they tell me they work as…. dancers…or even… um…. gentlemen’s assistants,I can’t very well say “Get out!” can I?Not my job to guess where they wear my work.

Oh…. um… Bev…

Well… I have this customer….Chi-Chi…. she’s a chihuahua…very sweet….

She asked about reserving the yurt today for a birthday party…she said she was bringing the cake….

Her business has something to do with delivering cakes…I think maybe she’s a baker?

Anyway, I don’t usually rent the yurt….

I use it for guests, and working on projects, and entertaining my friends….

But she assured me a few local officials would be there… very upscale guest list….

I guess I’ll go see what’s happening….

Oh MY….

Oh MY…..

I…um…. er… excuse me folks….I just wanted to see…. I mean…. well… I heard music….

And… Chi-Chi said…Well….um…carry on…..

Chi-Chi…. you do look… pretty…..and…. nevermind…. sorry…

Oops.

Really, though, Bev….I mean…. they’re not doing anything terrible…..

I just felt funny interrupting…I mean, if it’s Councilman Sweeny’s birthday and all….

Oh!Stormy!

We missed you too!

Hope you’re feeling better!

Maybe you need a little glitter…and some more of my special soup!

My Dear Sweet Susan,Everyone loves you. We love you artistic skills, We love your love for all of us. We love your cooking and your drink concoctions. We love Elvis and your yurt. But please dear lady … A little litter of glitter goes a long way !

LOL….

But Linguist… the ladies of Ballard Street, whatever our species….just love to sparkle!

And I happen to be a trained glitterer..in fact, a Certified Glitter Specialist….

with a degree in glittering from x_Tech Technical College…

I even helped develop (and hold exclusive Ballard County rights to sell) x_Tech Industries Color-changing glitter….

So you can see that glitter is an important part of my business.

StelBel is also on the license to sell the XTI glitter line… but I am her wholesale supplier, as I receive trainloads direct from X, at my glitter repository behind the salon.

Replied to you six yesterday’s strip.

Good Night Ballardeers and susan, StelBel and bev and Dazz- and all the gentlemen, munkey and who may drop in later.

Leon- get a grip! don’t tease Louie with a stuffed cat.

Shika!

When you drop in for 5 minutes I never catch you…..

And yes, I fear the Monkey may be glittery for quite a while!

I do have temporary glitter-glue…. much better for fur…but he apparently grabbed the tube of special super-hold permanent glue….

It can be removed…. but it takes lots of washings with remover.

My dear Linguist…Oh my…. I hope you’re not giving away any secrets there!

I mean…. I don’t ask my clients where they go (or what they do) once I have left them glamorously glittered…. nor has anyone been forthcoming enough for me to know …well…. or guess…upon whom your complaint is based.

Unless, of course, your objection is to the loose glitter often found floating in the Ballard Street air… some of which is ending up in your bed.

To that, indeed, I or my work may be a contributor…but it was there before me, and will remain after me….

Cos Ballard Street is such a naturally sparkly place!

@Stel, that prize winning pillow reminded me of another project of mine (a 9" copper plate on which I enameled the madonna and child on a golden flux background). I worked so hard on all the skin shadings and drapery folds in lovely shade of blue and I believe it won grand prize (and least first, long time ago). I gifted it the following Christmas to my godmother (with a house full of kids) and she kept it on her coffee table where it was promptly knocked off and the enamel shattered. That was a huge disappointment; like much of my art I never even got a photo. I think my mom purposely destroyed my reclining nude (painted in my teens, with a mirror); I have an even more lascivious mind now, but I’m the eldest of all my family so noone can stop me. I plan some private art for my room, but I’m not the subject.

@Bev, The bunny reminds me of my dear Cuddles. I could never leave a plate of anything on the counter with her around. She would even try for my whole wheat pizzas while they were cooling before I topped them.

Those skills would’ve come in handy here:

https://cleoandcompany.net/april-2-2023/

Good morning Balladeers and Tigressy!