Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for July 13, 2012

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling Presents: News of the Times Accused Burgular Incorporates Self When police caught RICHIE TYNER during a burglary, he quickly produced and executed a corporate charter. 00074 07092012 Richie: Oh, hello, officers. If you'll sign here, and here, as witnesses, TYNERCO, INC, will be a duly created corporation. Prosecutors were perplexed by the development. Man: That scumbag TYNER would go straight to jail...but how do we imprison a CORPORATION? Woman: The C.E.O. of Tynerco is offering full cooperation. Tynerco, Inc. TYNERCO C.E.O. RICHIE TYNER Richie: We regret the incident, and I assure you this does not reflect the IDEALS and STANDARDS here at Tynerco. TYNERCO C.C.O RICHIE TYNER Richie: Sure, we could find out WHO at Tynerco did THIS or approved THAT. But isn't it more important to put SYSTEMS in place to ensure this won't happen again? The victims are also chiefly concerned about changing the corporation's culture. Woman: No, we're not! Man: He's still got, like, $10,000 of our stuff! The case was resolved with a $2,000 fine. TYNERCO COMMUNICATIONS DIRECTOR RICHIE TYNER Richie: Plus, we were given a million-dollar tax incentive, not to outsource our van-driving and meth-purchasing operations to India!