My wife took me to McDonalds because she knew I’d only have a coffee and tell her the food smells bad. Next, she’ll take me to Taco Bell because she knows the same thing will happen. I’m trying to convince her that Subway is next so I can actually eat. I’ve always had a fondness for overcooked soy patties nestled in wilted veggies.
Once, while in a celebratory mode, out with a group of friends, I took the waitress aside and gave her money for the group bill and a generous tip. “Tell my friends that we are the restaurant’s 100,000th order and the management has picked up the check”, I said to her. She “sold it” like a professional actress. One friend said, “If I had known, I would have ordered steak.” A dancer at the table asked, “Will there be pictures?” Classic.
Reminds me of when I’d go out to eat with my late father. He’d insist on paying, but leave maybe a dollar as a tip — or maybe nothing. So I’d have to sneak a tip under my plate, and leave a bit of food so they wouldn’t clear it away early.
[Yes, I know tipping is a terrible system, but we weren’t going to change it by stiffing the wait staff at Denny’s. We were just going to make it harder for the wait staff to pay their rent that month.]
BE THIS GUY almost 4 years ago
Jeremy is going to die a virgin.
mattro65 almost 4 years ago
My wife took me to McDonalds because she knew I’d only have a coffee and tell her the food smells bad. Next, she’ll take me to Taco Bell because she knows the same thing will happen. I’m trying to convince her that Subway is next so I can actually eat. I’ve always had a fondness for overcooked soy patties nestled in wilted veggies.
well-i-never almost 4 years ago
Atta boy, Jeremy! What a sport!
Troglodyte almost 4 years ago
Reality check!
NeedaChuckle Premium Member almost 4 years ago
It is her fault for accepting the invitation!
nosirrom almost 4 years ago
The first and last time a woman buys him dinner.
mistercatworks almost 4 years ago
Once, while in a celebratory mode, out with a group of friends, I took the waitress aside and gave her money for the group bill and a generous tip. “Tell my friends that we are the restaurant’s 100,000th order and the management has picked up the check”, I said to her. She “sold it” like a professional actress. One friend said, “If I had known, I would have ordered steak.” A dancer at the table asked, “Will there be pictures?” Classic.
Cincoflex almost 4 years ago
Clueless as an eight year old, sigh
ZBicyclist Premium Member almost 4 years ago
Reminds me of when I’d go out to eat with my late father. He’d insist on paying, but leave maybe a dollar as a tip — or maybe nothing. So I’d have to sneak a tip under my plate, and leave a bit of food so they wouldn’t clear it away early.
[Yes, I know tipping is a terrible system, but we weren’t going to change it by stiffing the wait staff at Denny’s. We were just going to make it harder for the wait staff to pay their rent that month.]
Scoutmaster77 almost 4 years ago
With friends like this…