Close to Home by John McPherson for July 11, 2019

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    enigmamz  almost 5 years ago

    I once heard a lady ask if the ham she had picked had any pork in it. I once saw a man hand an empty grape stem to the cashier and say “I found this”.

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    whahoppened  almost 5 years ago

    Simple enough; the milk goes in the return-to-stock basket. I wanna see if the scanner comes up with a price for Bleeb!

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    jivanimark  almost 5 years ago

    Makes cents to me.

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    Stevefk  almost 5 years ago

    She should at least give him back her 2 cents worth!

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    derdave969  almost 5 years ago

    It isn’t so much the job, but the class of people it exposes you to.

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    InvertedCow  almost 5 years ago

    hence the reason that it is still against the law to kill stupid people. One day at work and I would hit my bag limit.

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    danholt  almost 5 years ago

    I have no patience with people who want to see the manager to argue about coupons, either…

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    Smokie  almost 5 years ago

    Our local store is in the middle of a complete reset. Our cashiers had been trained to ask if you found everything OK. I had the great fortune to be in the line of the funniest cashier who would say, "We thought we would make shopping more of an adventure for you. Just look at all the new friends you have made by asking where things are. And just when you think you know where it is, we will move it so you can look some more. (store name) is dedicated to your shopping pleasure, but we need you to spend more on impulse items. Thank you for shopping at (store name).

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    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    Some times the customer is not always right.

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    the lost wizard  almost 5 years ago

    How much is that green slime he’s buying?

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    Nate England  almost 5 years ago

    My favorite was a guy who came in the other day with a return without a receipt. He got mad when best we could offer was in-store credit; he wanted cash. His play was, “Walmart does it.” Forgetting that in our tiny town, practically everyone has worked there at one point or another. And, no, they don’t either.

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    MichaelHelwig  almost 5 years ago

    That guy looks like he lives in his parents’ basement.

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    JudyHendrickson  almost 5 years ago

    I used to say tomysef ohhhh,howILOVEmy job!!

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    Diat60  almost 5 years ago

    My pet peeve. Why, when I have a huge amount of groceries which I bag myself, does someone with three items decide the checkout I’m in is a good place to wait. The cashier will say “take your time”, but I have an urge to yell “go somewhere else!” You can just feel the impatience streaming from them.

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    Amra Leo  almost 5 years ago

    Ah, Bleeb. Peekin’ ’round the peanut butter…

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    Rabies65  almost 5 years ago

    My mom, often falling for junk science food trends, bought 2% milk, or as I called it, 98% water.

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    ekke  almost 5 years ago

    The real question about 2% milk: what is the other 98%?

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    Bonita Voigt  almost 5 years ago

    After the “chickie” remark he wouldn’t have made it any further to say the rest of that stupid sentence with me.

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    BubbleTape Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    “chickie”? i think that entitles her to shove 100% of that carton of 2% milk up his crevice where there is 0% sun.

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    TheLetterista.com  almost 5 years ago

    If a half gallon costs $4, then at least he got the math right.

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    William Stoneham Premium Member almost 5 years ago

    Assuming this genius doesn’t know that whole milk is only 4%, his calculation is based on 2% of $4 for a half gallon.

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    AtariDragon  almost 5 years ago

    Another very disturbing hand.

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