This is long but it’s the end of the night…>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Yesterday in old Fall RiverMr. Andrew Borden diedAnd he got his daughter, LizzieOn a charge of homicideSome folks say she didn’t do itAnd others say of course she didBut they all agree, Miss Lizzie BWas a problem kinda kid<<‘Cause you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsNot even if it’s plannedAs a surprise (a surprise)No, you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsYou know how neighbors love to criticize<<Well, she got him on the sofaWhere he’d gone to take a snoozeAnd I hope he went to Heaven‘Cause he wasn’t wearing shoesLizzie kinda rearranged himWith a hatchet so they sayThen she got her motherIn that same old fashioned way<<But you can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsNot even if you’re tired ofHer cuisine (her cuisine)No can’t chop your mama up in MassachusettsYou know it’s almost sure to cause a scene
<<Well, they really kept herHopping on that busy afternoonWith both down and upstairs choppingWhile she hummed a ragtime tuneThey really made her hustleAnd when all was said and doneShe’d removed her mother’s bustleWhen she wasn’t wearing one<<Now can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsAnd then blame all the damageOn the mice (on the mice)No, you can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsThat sort of thing just isn’t very nice<<Now it wasn’t done for pleasureAnd it wasn’t done for spiteAnd it wasn’t done becauseThe lady wasn’t very brightShe’d always done the slightest thingThat mom and papa bidThey said, Lizzie, cut it outSo that’s exactly what she did<<But you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsAnd then get dressedAnd go out for a walkNo, you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsMassachusetts is a far cryFrom New York<<You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts………………………………………….
Shut the door and lock and latch itHere comes Lizzie with a brand new hatchet…………………………………………You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts………………………………………………..Such a snob I’ve heard it saidShe met her pa and cut him dead…………………………………………………..You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts…………………………………………………..Jump like a fishJump like a porpoiseAll join hands and habeas corpus……………………………………………You can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsMassachusetts is a far cryFrom New York
Linguist over 11 years ago
Don’t forget about Godiva’s constant wardrobe malfunctions and Rapunzel, incessantly complaining about split ends !
Digital Frog over 11 years ago
♪♫And Socrates himself was particularly missed…
uniquename over 11 years ago
Marquis de Sades’ … um better not go there.
Sherlock Watson over 11 years ago
Oedipus’ therapy bills?
Sherlock Watson over 11 years ago
I saw the Doctor Who episode “Vincent and the Doctor,” and I thought the great artist was very well portrayed in it.Ears to you, Vinnie!
Intophaloblue over 11 years ago
Oh, what’s the Mag to do?? All of these whiners about! Maybe she can get Lucy Harding to serve up some chicken salad to all her unfortunate guests.
pcolli over 11 years ago
Oh dear, Cleopatra’s complaining that she’s been bitten.
Linguist over 11 years ago
This is long but it’s the end of the night…>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Yesterday in old Fall RiverMr. Andrew Borden diedAnd he got his daughter, LizzieOn a charge of homicideSome folks say she didn’t do itAnd others say of course she didBut they all agree, Miss Lizzie BWas a problem kinda kid<<‘Cause you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsNot even if it’s plannedAs a surprise (a surprise)No, you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsYou know how neighbors love to criticize<<Well, she got him on the sofaWhere he’d gone to take a snoozeAnd I hope he went to Heaven‘Cause he wasn’t wearing shoesLizzie kinda rearranged himWith a hatchet so they sayThen she got her motherIn that same old fashioned way<<But you can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsNot even if you’re tired ofHer cuisine (her cuisine)No can’t chop your mama up in MassachusettsYou know it’s almost sure to cause a scene
<<Well, they really kept herHopping on that busy afternoonWith both down and upstairs choppingWhile she hummed a ragtime tuneThey really made her hustleAnd when all was said and doneShe’d removed her mother’s bustleWhen she wasn’t wearing one<<Now can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsAnd then blame all the damageOn the mice (on the mice)No, you can’t chop yourMama up in MassachusettsThat sort of thing just isn’t very nice<<Now it wasn’t done for pleasureAnd it wasn’t done for spiteAnd it wasn’t done becauseThe lady wasn’t very brightShe’d always done the slightest thingThat mom and papa bidThey said, Lizzie, cut it outSo that’s exactly what she did<<But you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsAnd then get dressedAnd go out for a walkNo, you can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsMassachusetts is a far cryFrom New York<<You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts………………………………………….
Shut the door and lock and latch itHere comes Lizzie with a brand new hatchet…………………………………………You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts………………………………………………..Such a snob I’ve heard it saidShe met her pa and cut him dead…………………………………………………..You can’t chop yourPapa up in Massachusetts…………………………………………………..Jump like a fishJump like a porpoiseAll join hands and habeas corpus……………………………………………You can’t chop yourPapa up in MassachusettsMassachusetts is a far cryFrom New York