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Pearls Before Swine

By Stephan Pastis
158,742
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Nov 30, 2011
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Goat: You spend too much time on that iPhone. It's not healthy. Noise: Beep boop bepp. Noise: CRUSH. Rat: The 'Monty Python' app. Pig; What happened to me?
Dec 2, 2011
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  1. Profile photo
    StrummerFan  about 6 years ago

    Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

     •  Reply
  2. Ts
    killacowinWA  about 6 years ago

    Always look on the bright side of life…

     •  Reply
  3. Missing large
    legaleagle48  about 6 years ago

    And now for something completely different!

     •  Reply
  4. Man hat2
    rf_eq  about 6 years ago

    more like a “splat” than a “crush”

     •  Reply
  5. Knees phuh
    phuhknees  about 6 years ago

    “My brain hurts!”

     •  Reply
  6. Cat3
    Nabuquduriuzhur  about 6 years ago

    Wonder if Sousa would have gotten a kick out of Monty Python using his Liberty Bell March as their theme music?

     •  Reply
  7. Chris88
    chireef GC Insider about 6 years ago

    spam, spam, spam, …spam, spam, spam, spam

     •  Reply
  8. Brad tele
    jpsomebody  about 6 years ago

    @PopeyesforearmFrom yesterday.

    By changing the language of my keyboard to spanish and then hold the ctrl key while pressing the symbol

     •  Reply
  9. Brad tele
    jpsomebody  about 6 years ago

    Where is the guy at the piano?

     •  Reply
  10. Missing large
    jozzeke  about 6 years ago

    Nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more.

     •  Reply
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    Hugh B. Hayve  about 6 years ago

    Where can I download the “16 Ton Weight” app? If I get attacked by someone with a bunch of loganberries I want to be prepared.

     •  Reply
  12. Coffee avatar
    clivia grana GC Insider about 6 years ago

    we’re all individuals……

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    goalgo  about 6 years ago

    why is this in my in box? its Spam

     •  Reply
  14. Thinker
    Sisyphos  about 6 years ago

    Smashing! Spilled coffee trope! A tribute to the brilliance of Terry Gilliam and Monty Python’s Flying Circus!

     •  Reply
  15. Sunshine   copy
    SusanSunshine GC Insider about 6 years ago

    ananomoose and Popeye —

    Very enterprising…. but…. um….. you might find it faster to just use alt codes.

    Hold down the alt key and type 168 on the numeric keypad only , not the numbers above the letters, release the alt key, and you get ¿

    Alt and 173 is ¡.

    ¿¿¿¡¡¡!!!

    I happen to have those and a dozen or so more memorized from years of use — ♪ ♥ £ etc — but there are tons of online charts you can bookmark if you google “alt characters”.

    You can also use Character Map in Accessories on a Windows computer to copy and paste - but be aware that not every character will work here -- websites vary.

    And some alt codes do tricks — alt 14 should make a barred music note but instead it loses your comment. After a while you learn some of that.

     •  Reply
  16. Dd2
    jukeofurl  about 6 years ago

    Lousy Vikings!

     •  Reply
  17. 619jrrggs6l. uy600
    Number Six  about 6 years ago

    “We used to dream of living in a corridor!”

     •  Reply
  18. Burrowing owl attack
    emjaycee  about 6 years ago

    Albatross!

     •  Reply
  19. Starman
    Michael Rosser GC Insider about 6 years ago

    best.app.ever.

     •  Reply
  20. Snoopyhockey
    cdward  about 6 years ago

    And by the way, I need that App!

     •  Reply
  21. W12
    chris_weaver  about 6 years ago

    Looks like Goat is now ‘pining for the fjords’.

     •  Reply
  22. Dsc00002
    cork  about 6 years ago

    I’m a lumberjack….

     •  Reply
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    57-Don  about 6 years ago

    crunchy frog

     •  Reply
  24. 20071112 einstein
    hariseldon59  about 6 years ago

    Killer joke!

     •  Reply
  25. Missing large
    Lman GC Insider about 6 years ago

    It’s….

     •  Reply
  26. Calvin
    starkeyt62  about 6 years ago

    I’m not dead.

     •  Reply
  27. Imagesca66di1a
    Thehag  about 6 years ago

    Rat could do the Fish Dance bucky from Get Fuzzy.And one of the crocs Brain Hurts.

     •  Reply
  28. Spiney norman
    tim the wizard  about 6 years ago

    lets not get all worried about oo killed oo.

     •  Reply
  29. Missing large
    madmike90  about 6 years ago

    brilliant! looks like pig sufferred barely a flesh wound!

     •  Reply
  30. Flash
    pschearer GC Insider about 6 years ago

    I once attended an outdoor Fourth of July concert in which the Philadelphia Orchestra played Sousa’s Liberty Bell March. At the appropriate moment, several hundred audience members made that rude noise I’m never sure how to spell. Stupid programming on someone’s part, but hey, there’s a lot of ways to celebrate freedom.

    (Hi, SSS! You get more interesting all the time.)

     •  Reply
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    shewith5  about 6 years ago

    No march playing, but I do have “every Little Sperm is Sacred” Goin’ round and round in my noggin

     •  Reply
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    ninetoes  about 6 years ago

    But I don’t like Spam!

     •  Reply
  33. Lila
    Kathy Freeman GC Insider about 6 years ago

    And now…..for something completely different….=^..^=

     •  Reply
  34. Threetoms
    catqueen  about 6 years ago

    Do you mean an European or an African sparrow?

     •  Reply
  35. Missing large
    Redwall22  about 6 years ago

    I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

     •  Reply
  36. Ronald reagan
    OldestandWisest  about 6 years ago

    I would have preferred the 16 ton weight.

     •  Reply
  37. 170
    finale  about 6 years ago

    “You nailed his little feet to the perch….”

     •  Reply
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    orinoco womble  about 6 years ago

    That goat has ceased to be! It has shuffled off this mortal coil and joined the choir invisible! It is an EX-GOAT!!!

     •  Reply
  39. 20071112 einstein
    hariseldon59  about 6 years ago

    Next time Rat should just use the ‘Star Trek’ App and have Goat “beamed” away.

     •  Reply
  40. 005
    tahoeh2o  about 6 years ago

    Now maybe Pig can fly…

     •  Reply
  41. Missing large
    Tue Elung-Jensen  about 6 years ago

    if that exists I want it.

     •  Reply
  42. Oil can harry 2
    OilCanHarry  about 6 years ago

    Nothing to see here, folks. No Cleese for alarm. Move along.

     •  Reply
  43. Exclamation
    johndifool  about 6 years ago

    “crunchy frog”

    More like Crunchy Goat…

     •  Reply
  44. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  about 6 years ago

    Dinsdale…

     •  Reply
  45. Bedrich smetana
    mmm_spam  about 6 years ago

    Best use ever of a Bronzino Cupid’s foot.

     •  Reply
  46. Missing large
    KarlW2000  about 6 years ago

    What do you think of it so far?

     •  Reply
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    Snoopy_Fan  about 6 years ago

    And this is where Pastis introduces the killer rabbit…

     •  Reply
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    Chibi-robo64  about 6 years ago

    Psst… guys. Time to RUN!

     •  Reply
  49. Missing large
    tigre1  about 6 years ago

    And this time Pig, meet the other white meat, you turkey.

     •  Reply
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    metropolitan gnome  about 6 years ago

    “this was a PBS program: your computer will now explode.”

     •  Reply
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    Gokie5  about 6 years ago

    d’ D’ d’ dah dah dah DAH dah dah dah d’ D’ d’ dah dah dah DAH dahhh dahhh . . .

     •  Reply
  52. 08 6
    tegm  about 6 years ago

    Monty Python’s flying cir-cus~~~~

     •  Reply
  53. Hello kitty uk
    Number Three (Free Afficionado)  about 6 years ago

    Wow, Pig looks amazing.

    LOL xxx

     •  Reply
  54. Tumble
    Keno21  about 6 years ago

    Goat needs to lob the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch at Rat, who, being naughty in my eyes, shall snuff-it.

     •  Reply
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    bossyheifer GC Insider about 6 years ago

    And there was much rejoicing! yeeeeeeaaaa

     •  Reply
  56. Popeyesforearm image
    Popeyesforearm  about 6 years ago

    Goat’s been turned into Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam..

     •  Reply
  57. Yellow pig small
    bmonk  about 6 years ago

    Hahahah! I’m just wondering where Pig’s banner is to haul across the screen.

     •  Reply
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    aircraft-engineer  about 6 years ago

    and now for something completely different…

     •  Reply
  59. Missing large
    Alms4Thorby  about 6 years ago

    I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok, I sleep all night; I work all day.

     •  Reply
  60. Hammy
    pnorman1 GC Insider about 6 years ago

    Also known as the Bilabial fricative. Thank you George Carlin.

     •  Reply
  61. Sunshine   copy
    SusanSunshine GC Insider about 6 years ago

    Hi Schearer! (If you ever get back here to see this…) Been wondering where you went.

    And here I thought I was boring everybody silly :)

    (If you can’t be silly ONE way, try another, I always say.)

     •  Reply
  62. Sunshine   copy
    SusanSunshine GC Insider about 6 years ago

    As to the alt characters — Harry, anonamoose et all -

    The VERY fastest and easiest way, if you only need a few, is still the keyboard. Alt 130 - boom! -- é, and there you go.

    But sure, once you go beyond characters you know by heart, there are tons of ways and places to get them for pasting.

    I have several charts bookmarked, both HTML AND alt chars, and can get some rather quickly from character map cos now I know where to look.

    Mostly, in fact, I started a blank Word document called Symbols.doc and pasted in the ones I need most often.

    I have quick access to it because I use Windows 7, with Word pinned to the taskbar and “Symbols” pinned to the right-click menu.

    If I really need a ☠ or a ♕ I just open that.

    Even faster is my unicode text version, but I can’t keep the font of an individual wordpad file (.txt) large enough for my eyesight.

    Everybody will find the most comfortable way for himself.

    (yeah yeah or “herself”. Grammar is grammar, folks.)

    Just didn’t go into all that cos I figured I already posted too much………

    …..sigh…. and this doesn’t counter that feeling……

    And Night-Gaunt — funny, I’ve always liked that word too.

    And “nevertheless”, which I use more often….

     •  Reply
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    Ginrummy33  about 6 years ago

    It’s always bloody loupins!

     •  Reply
  64. Iiisimpson800yearold
    simpsonfan2  about 6 years ago

    Mr. Arthur ‘Two Sheds’ Jackson.

     •  Reply
  65. Rude stencil
    soupygeorge GC Insider about 6 years ago

    Stop that! It’s silly!

     •  Reply
  66. Cat29
    x_Tech GC Insider about 6 years ago

    C: Well, I was, uh, sitting quietly, reading all these comments, and I suddenly came over all peckish.

    O: Peckish, sir?

    C: Esuriant.

    O: Eh?

    C: ’Ee I were all ’ungry-like!

    O: Ah, hungry!

    C: In a nutshell. And I thought to myself, ‘a little fermented curd will do the trick’, so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!

    O: Come again?

    C: I want to buy some cheese.

     •  Reply
  67. Missing large
    SMSM  about 6 years ago

    Classic PBS

     •  Reply
  68. Missing large
    A.Ficionada  about 6 years ago

    “The larch.”!!!

     •  Reply
  69. Hamchimp
    codedaddy  about 6 years ago

    Today’s logorrhea is more than excessive. At least 80% of the comments could have been skipped to reader advantage.

     •  Reply
  70. Civil defense symbol
    firedome  about 6 years ago

    isn’t it odd that a british comedy troupe would use as their show’s theme something having to do with the liberty bell?

     •  Reply
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    theLydMonster22  about 6 years ago

    Nudge nudge know what I mean? SAY NO MORE!!!!!

     •  Reply
  72. Js bunny avatar
    JoeStrike  about 6 years ago

    Okay if we can put the MP quotes aside for a second…

    I don’t know if Pastis or any of you folks are aware of this, but there is a kink out there for something called “crush videos” that are exactly what it sounds like – close-ups of a shoe (I think a woman’s shoe, never seen one of these myself – honest!) squishing a small animal. If you’re really curious Wikipedia can enlighten you:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crush_videos

    I’m sure (I hope) this strip isn’t a subterranean reference to that sort of stuff!

     •  Reply
  73. Missing large
    tormie  about 6 years ago

    shouldn’t that’ve been a farting sound?

    And for some reason, I’m embarrassed to know that…

     •  Reply
  74. Ts
    killacowinWA  about 6 years ago

    Based on the number of comments, ‘Pearls’ and Monty Python must have very similar appeals.

     •  Reply
  75. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  about 6 years ago

    So where’s “TheSpanishInquisition”? I was expecting him today…

     •  Reply
  76. Missing large
    texansdave  over 5 years ago

    Bring out your dead.

     •  Reply
  77. Missing large
    CosmoFan47  almost 3 years ago

    And Karl Marx said he was offside!

     •  Reply
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